The Great 'Where to meet people on the cheap' Hunt

debbosc40

Well said Lionhead - I was thinking the exact same thing. I have tried the datingforparents and found someone who I thought was special but in the end, they werent! I have now receided myself to find love IF it comes my way!

I have been going to a carpentry and joinery course one eve a week but even though I have a choice of lads to look at - it's still hard to break the ice and say 'do you fancy a drink sometime?'

johnedwards64

No, I'm not saying it's all about money (although for women it seems money does play a big part - don't tell her about your credit card debts on the first date!), but if you're hoping to find an apple on the ground it helps if you get yourself into an orchard and give all the trees a good shake!

nikkie

Hi everyone,

I've used loads of different dating sites over the years [about 5/6 years now]- i first used social/dating sites when a teenager (using AOL chatrooms- potentially far dodgier then than now! we were talking via email and phone for 2 YEARS before we actually met in the flesh... I was about 14/15 at the time of meeting him). i've still now got that friend i made during that time- nothing romantic has ever happened between us. i then began using them again when living in london to get out and about and meet new people... and i do have some friends as a result.... but it didn't take long for this to move into specifically for dating though! (moved away from London since then).

I've met all walks of people and not been too closed off to only going for my "type". Don't actually have a type really... if my cross section of past BFs is anything to go by! and that's the mistake most make- don't ignor/forget someone just because they aren't your typical type . Photos can lie [LOADS! and not look anything like the person] so don't trust them when deciding to meet with someone/not. i also try and meet up with people sooner rather than later- why? because i don't want to spend too long "courting" only to meet them and think "er... no, well that's # weeks i'll never get back!". nothing beats a face-to-face meeting to find out if you have that "spark"... and actually fancy them!
you do get weirdos, if your actively dating and haven't had/don't get any you've been very lucky!- just make sure you meet the various people at a public location and have a friend on "emergency call" standby in case you have/want to leave! (you should tell at least 1 other person you're going on a date regardless of this phonecall idea!). Never get people to pick you up from your home... you don't want them to know where you live if they're weirdos! if things go well, THEN let them know your address to pick you up etc. if they want to know why you don't want picking up from your home- be honest!! tell them you don't know them well enough yet etcetc. most people would aprechiate your honesty and that should give you brownie points!!!

Some sites i've paid for, most i haven't. here's a rundown:
there's love@lycos [go to the flirt/chat section- tabs at the top of their main search page]. which is mostly free- extra features come at a cost but these aren't needed. i've had quite a few dates as a result of contact from this site.
loopylove.com is another that's technically free- i think if you agree to receive advert emails you earn points to use towards contacting people. you can just pay for the service and avoid all this... depends how cheap you are i guess! :-D I have had dates from this, though not many.
midsummerseve.com is another that's completely free. but it's a little less known so, as a result, there are less people (though this could actually be a good thing??). I think i've maybe had 2 or 3 dates as a result of this site.
plentyoffish.com is one mentioned a lot in other posts. i probably use this the most as it [as everyone else has said] is free. not only is it free but it has just as much, if not more on offer, than some of the paid for sites- chat module, multiple photos etcetc. it being the most well known of the free sites makes it quite large [in terms of members] too. I've had a reasonable amount of contact/dates via this site (inc weirdos!).
match.com just didn't offer enough for my liking for the amount you would have to pay. If you were able to see who sent you emails for free rather than having to pay- only then deciding if it was worth paying up to read what they had said, then i may be more interested. but i don't want to pay £30 ish to see an email from someone it quickly turns out i'm really not interested in! they do offer 3 day free trials, but you have to enter payment details to get it [cancel straight away to avoid forgetting- your account doesn't close immediately after you cancel, it just ends automatically on the 3rd day]. the cost is just too high IMHO.
girlsdateforfree is a branch off from loopylove but, as the name says, girls don't pay. this was because in the early days of internet dating women were few and far between and the dating sites had to do something to increase the amount of women and this site was born!
There's sarah beenie's (sp?) dating site that she set up- it's something like mysinglefriend.com/co.uk and is designed to allow your friends to post you up and write all about you to "pimp" you to potentials. seems like a relatively good idea- but your friends prob won't be truely honest! and you have to get them to do it in the first place, and update/maintain it [i think! correct me if wrong here people!]. i haven't bothered with this site, so maybe someone else can give better info about this!?

My success rate with regard to getting dates has varied. sometimes i've dated 4 different men in 1 week!:D other times i'm lucky to have one date in 3 months [usually longer]:eek: . i go through fazes of seriously hitting the dating sites to "can't be bothered" style attitudes. so just because someone hasn't been active in the last 2, 3, 4 plus weeks doesn't mean you shouldn't send them that email. contact them anyway- you never know!

Happy dating everyone!
Nikkie xx.

For the single men out there:

---

27 - female - single, no kids - in blackburn, Lancs!

Urban_chameleon

I just had to contribute to this thread as you lovely people in the forum have given me so much.

It’s comments for dates not for meeting

Here’s what I think.

Blokes please note: I’m speaking as a fairly romantic female who also has her feet firmly planted on the ground and understands money issues.

Ladies: you might not agree with me. Okay, I’m a feminist when it comes to equal pay and conditions but in the job of dating, I’m willing to be less of a feminist.

I’ve always thought that early dates (first, second, third) can be short. See it as a getting to know each other exercise. For that type of thing I would prefer a nice drink (and one is enough at this stage) in a nice place over a meal in a cheap restaurant. Going to a nice place for one drink might cost less or about the same as a meal but it makes me feel special, which every lady wants. Same goes for flowers: I prefer one beautiful rose from a good florist to a bunch bought in a motorway lay-by.

Cinema is also a good option at the beginning. Can be a bit embarrassing when you’re not sure how much to touch. But you don’t have to talk too much.

One of my greatest first dates was a guy who came to pick me up on his motorbike and drove me around Paris to see the sites by night. Okay, you don’t all have a motorbike and you don’t all live in Paris. But the point is, it was cheap and imaginative.

My other half, who I’d known for 3 months at this time, won my heart with a very simple gesture. We were watching TV one night and an ad came on for a new ice cream that I really wanted to taste. Next time he came to see me, he had that exact ice cream in his hand. Again, only a couple of quid but I loved it because he’d paid attention to me and remembered what I like.

One horror story for you: I was on a date with a guy (not OH) and he offered to pay. On dates I always offer to pay but he insisted and proceeded to take out a little purse and count out his coins onto the table. I understand money saving but this was just not good dating etiquette. Remember to take some notes with you!

Alison (who is rapidly getting addicted to MSE forums : is there a cure ?)

Li0nhead

Urban_chameleon wrote: »

One horror story for you: I was on a date with a guy (not OH) and he offered to pay. On dates I always offer to pay but he insisted and proceeded to take out a little purse and count out his coins onto the table. I understand money saving but this was just not good dating etiquette. Remember to take some notes with you!

Alison (who is rapidly getting addicted to MSE forums : is there a cure ?)

lol Made me think, id hate to end up with someone from MSE, think of the potential arguments a few dates in:

Me: "I went shopping today got my weekly shop at the cheap place, not going there again though their own brand beans have gone up a penny to 21p a tin."

Her: "You waste too much money, they are 19p a tin at the other cheap store"

Me: "ah but the breads 3p more where you shop....."

two hours later:

Either of us: "You started this debate outside this restaraunt because you know it was closing an hour after we got here and were still outside debating beans and bread because we dont really want to pay a £25 for the meal....."

There no cure for addiction to this site.

Basically relationships are something that happens in a different way for every couple, theres no one way to find 'the one' (untill you meet me ladies :rotfl:).

Try your hobbies folks, surely theres like minded people in what your hobby is.

All us single types have an idea of what they want. In my case a highly attractive multi millionaire who is very stupid. But thats never going to happen in the real world....:rotfl:

narnia2000

Met my ex through friendfinder....don't know how that is anymore, it used to be international and free, various chat rooms for many different interests:)
Met my current through UK personals, seems to have shrunk now, however it did what it said on the tin.....free, and at that time had a lot of members, maybe if you all sign on, it will kick off again?

Li0nhead

My place......

Bed time lionhead.....

emjaybee

Hi everyone
Hope you are all oK.

I'm a fairly new to this site and would like to say thanks to all for the helpful information posted.

I live in Greater Manchester and would recommend SPICE as a great way of socialising with new friends. But I like the idea of local moneysavers getting together to socailise not necessarily for dating but to make friends with like minded people. What does everyone else think?

Take care

M

sylvia13

Like Jackiy, I have started my own group. I live near Southampton/Winchester and started In-Sync (www.in-sync.org.uk) three years ago with a friend. He has since become engaged and at the present time we have twelve couples who have all met within the group. We have about 150 members now. Our membership fee is £5 for a month to try it out and £36 for a year's membership. The money goes right back into the club for various expenses. We have lots of social activities going on, including: walking, dining in/out, parties, dinner dances, games evenings, quizzes, debates, cinema, theatre, gardening group, French speaking group (who are all going to France this month for a week) and book club, etc. Recently we all became involved in making our own film and are thinking of doing a pantomime. It's lots of fun and a great place to be if you're single. However, I'm still waiting for Mr Right to walk through the door! Our age group is from 40s up. There's IVC down this way too. Sylvia

indie_girl

My sister and I have both used www.plentyoffish.com (or is it co.uk?? ) and although I'm yet to meet the love of my life, I have made some great friends. And best of all, it's completely free!

I did sign up to some of the Facebook dating applications, but at least 99% of the men who contacted me were married and the rest lived abroad, so I gave up on that!