Does your partner pay you rent?

jezza1O1

too_many_details wrote:

No longer is it a world where the men provide and the women nurture. Nowadays we are all encouraged to be equal.

indeed, its one of those be careful for what you wish for things. Women have fought hard for equality and Im afraid that means giving up the 'perks' as well as the negatives - and rightly so. Soz gals but Ive been bought up to believe in equality, I didnt ask to be!

So now we have the silly situation where although I take home over double my partners pay packet (thats not a male/female divide btw, its a public/private sector one!) she insists on paying half of everything where tbh Im not that bothered. Still, means I have more money to spend on boys stuff, and of course when Im allowed to spend money on her (birthday, christmas etc) then I do !

I thought the comments on romance were kinda sad, you gotta feel sorry for people who equate money with romance, imo the two are quite different - but again I guess thats from being brought up as a modern chap !

lady_noluck

My boyfriend lives with me in MY house. I pay the morgage and bills and he gives me a contribution each month. Call it rent if you like. It does cause arguements cos he has to give me money but if he was renting somewhere he'd have to pay rent so why not to me. I can't afford to pay for everything for him to spend his wages on "boys stuff" each month. Why should I pay for him? We earn roughly the same wage so he should contribute. Those who say romance is dead, why? Isn't it more romantic to share and be equal rather than build up resentment over one partner having to pay for everything?
Hmmm rant over, I feel better now :j

elvis_bloggs

.................

Sofa_Sogood

lady_noluck wrote:

My boyfriend lives with me in MY house. I pay the morgage and bills and he gives me a contribution each month. Call it rent if you like. It does cause arguements cos he has to give me money but if he was renting somewhere he'd have to pay rent so why not to me. I can't afford to pay for everything for him to spend his wages on "boys stuff" each month. Why should I pay for him? We earn roughly the same wage so he should contribute. Those who say romance is dead, why? Isn't it more romantic to share and be equal rather than build up resentment over one partner having to pay for everything?
Hmmm rant over, I feel better now :j

As much as I like to think I'm a feminist ... I can't be 100%

And regarding the romance is dead part?

All I can say is that when my daughter moved in with her (then) boyfriend, and asked us to help her out financially btw ... it was because she was his partner, but paid what a lodger would have paid.

The only problem was, her (then ) partner, charged her what he'd charged his former lodger - say £200 a month as an example.

But the difference was ... she was sleeping with her (then) partner. And he then started to ask for rent for the pleasure She never used the former lodgers room.

Does that make sense?

Sofa_Sogood

jezza1O1 wrote:

indeed, its one of those be careful for what you wish for things. Women have fought hard for equality and Im afraid that means giving up the 'perks' as well as the negatives - and rightly so. Soz gals but Ive been bought up to believe in equality, I didnt ask to be!

So now we have the silly situation where although I take home over double my partners pay packet (thats not a male/female divide btw, its a public/private sector one!) she insists on paying half of everything where tbh Im not that bothered. Still, means I have more money to spend on boys stuff, and of course when Im allowed to spend money on her (birthday, christmas etc) then I do !

I thought the comments on romance were kinda sad, you gotta feel sorry for people who equate money with romance, imo the two are quite different - but again I guess thats from being brought up as a modern chap !

I think I've just quoted lady_noluck when I should have quoted you.

Apologies to lady_noluck

If I had a son, I'd probably want him to be happy, well off, a 'modern chap' etc etc ...

..... but not when he charges rent to someone he's going to marry.

Unless he marries the real lodger ....



Don't rule out romance vs money .... it might be an age thing but it works in most cases .... imo.

lady_noluck

That's ok Sofa.

Elvis how did you know what my boyf looks like?? That's just like him!!!!! Obviously my beard's a little shorter

Daniel_B

I think it is ridiculous if your in a relationship for one person to solely look after the finances - what kind of teamwork is that then??

Especially if you both work, then it's just unfathomable.

Myself and my partner have a very simple fair way of sorting all bills.

These figures are purely for example.

Overall joint take home pay = £3000

Person A: Take home after TAX = £1000 - as a percentage overall take home = 33.33%
Person B: Take home after TAX = £2000 - as a percentage overall take home = 66.66%

Total bills = £1500

Person A: Pays 33.33% of £1500
Person B: Pays 66.66% of £1500

We both manage the finances, and we both know what is going on ALL the time, whenever renewal comes around for any service we discuss, and sometimes both look for the best deal, and when a large purchase is required (Car, Sofas etc) we sit down and discuss what we want to spend, and go from there.

We have a joint savings account for house expenses, and pay an amount into that each month to cover larger purchases, or put money towards it.

We are very romantic, and romance is very important, but for us, teamwork is THE most important thing, afterall to stay together for ever, you need to be a phenomenally good team.

Dan

Ember999

Daniel_B wrote:

I think it is ridiculous if your in a relationship for one person to solely look after the finances - what kind of teamwork is that then??

Especially if you both work, then it's just unfathomable.

Myself and my partner have a very simple fair way of sorting all bills.

These figures are purely for example.

Overall joint take home pay = £3000

Person A: Take home after TAX = £1000 - as a percentage overall take home = 33.33%
Person B: Take home after TAX = £2000 - as a percentage overall take home = 66.66%

Total bills = £1500

Person A: Pays 33.33% of £1500
Person B: Pays 66.66% of £1500

We both manage the finances, and we both know what is going on ALL the time, whenever renewal comes around for any service we discuss, and sometimes both look for the best deal, and when a large purchase is required (Car, Sofas etc) we sit down and discuss what we want to spend, and go from there.

We have a joint savings account for house expenses, and pay an amount into that each month to cover larger purchases, or put money towards it.

We are very romantic, and romance is very important, but for us, teamwork is THE most important thing, afterall to stay together for ever, you need to be a phenomenally good team.

Dan

I see what you are saying hon but team-work applies even if one person looks after the finances. My hubby and I are a team and I discuss everything with him (even though most the time time he says for me to decide as I know best etc.) and it works very well for us that I look after the money. It's what he wanted after we got married. I guess all couples find their own way of doing things, it's just we would find it most unromantic splitting things 33%/66% etc....depends on how you look at things.

funky-footprints

my husband was actually my landlord at one time !! (it isnt that seedy honest) my parents paid my rent and he used to cash the cheques and give it me back, as I was always skint. I moved in with him after a while, and my poor parents continued to pay my rent until we got engaged !!! then they told him I was his responsibilty ....... (I was too scared to tell them we were living together as my dad is so old fashioned) god how spoiled was I ? ? ? ? We married 9 months after we were engaged, and are still happily married, only he does occasionally say, praps I should of listened to your dad !!!!!!!