Tired of being afraid

rosyc_2

keren29 wrote: »

yep - been there. I was working 2 jobs to pay off £25,000 of debt with the help of MSE and was basically doing a minimum 60 hour week, every week. I had an appalling work situation (which led to the depression and break down), I was trying to study for a Masters degree, keep the house together, problems with my OH and trying pay for food for 2 on an absolute pittance of a budget and I never went out other than work - ever.

It all fell apart for a bit and then I realised I had to stop something, somewhere. I didn't progress with the Masters (good call with my change of career), decided to take on the situation at work and got help at the doctors.

It WILL get better. Until then, take each day at a time, have a read around some of the threads and challenges, say hello wherever you fancy it and trust me, we'll get you through it.

I totally relate to your story, in fact reading that has made me realise that I really am at the end of my tether and something has got to give, it's not so much that i am tired, as am normally not so bad, its more that i can;t see an end to it, however what you have said has made me realise that I was doing all my sums based on having 2 jobs and trying to save as much as I can, but once my debts are paid off I can maybe give up my second job and try to manage on one income, won't need as much when debts are gone anyway, have to consider my quality of life which is very poor at the moment.

rosyc_2

lincs1205 wrote: »

Hi Rosyc, i am a newbie as well, im 29 and have been qualified as a nurse for nearly 2 years now. i have got debts of 13500 with a default attached to one of those which i have just finished paying off, im single as well still living at home with my parents. but have decided that once i have finished paying my debts off hopefully by december or january i am going to go travelling probably for a year or so, i would like to meet somebody and get my own house but i want to make the most of my life as life is to short. I hit a really low period while i was in the last year of my training i was unable to pay my rent due to my own stupidity in not budgeting appropriately id fall behing with one months rent then another then another until in the end during the holidays my landlords contacted me and threatened to take me to court, my parents bailed me out but i came really close to thinking about taking my own life. but i didnt im now qualified and have got a gorgeous nephew who i adore. Sorry for rambling dont know where that came from.

Don't apologise for rambling at all, have been doing lots myself today. Relate to your situation as well, was falling behind with rent at uni, had to be bailed out by parents a few times, I feel by my age that I should be in a better situation, but my eyes have really been opened here by people saying having a house and partner aren't the be all and end all, which I suppose they're not, still want them though! feel not so alone when other people are saying they don't have these things and they're ok with that. Thanks for posting.

fc123

rosyc wrote: »

Hi, an exercise class would be a good idea, I will look to see if there is one near me, you're right there may be others in a similar position am just so tired at the moment, but I could look for one available on weekends as am less busy then, feel something has got to change, even if it's only small things, which is part of the reason i decided to post on here, needed to get out of my rut, I realise it may not seem a big step to some people, but i have never posted anything anywhere, can barely manage to email, so was a big step for me and have already "met" so many nice people.

Hi I don't have much time to post in this board but pop over to read a lot.

The excercise suggestion is a good one. It saved me 3 yrs ago...we were sinking fast.....currently treading water....and battling the credit crunch.

I read that excercise (of any sort, even a brisk walk) gets oxygen flowing and is proven to lift mood. I found it out by accident on a Doctors website (researching for MIL) as it recommended prescribing anti depressents to those with lung disease as less oxygen going into brain can 'bring on' depression,,,,whether this is correct or not, I can only post what I recall but it was a proper medi site.

If you can afford £££ and time for classes well worth getting into.
Can be addictive too...but in a good way.

The dog walking for rescue centre sounded good too...if you like dogs (more of a cat person me).

As I'm 10 yrs on you I can only say that things do imporove if one can kind of 'take charge'. Things don't usually just work themselves out totally alone...but need a bit of a kick sometime.

Chin up...this site is full of really great people too:D

rosyc_2

I think the exercise thing is a good idea, you are right, things do need a kick sometimes, being so low is very tiring but I see things need to change so I have lots of research to do tomorrow!

Burlesque_Babe

excellent - I'm really glad you're going to do that

rosyc_2

Thanks keren, you have been so helpful tonight, I can't tell you how much that means to me, have allsorts of different options running through my head at the moment which I didn't have yesterday, and beginning to feel a bit braver about posting on other threads, so glad I joined, you have been great xxx

Burlesque_Babe

everyone on DFW is fantastic - a few resident nutters (in the nicest way ) but everyone is helpful and has something they can throw in the pot experience or ideas wise. There's always plenty of virtual tea and jaffa cakes available.

Seriously, come and say hello on the daily chat thread, there is one every day on the DFW board - or the nightowl one if you are up at this time of night

I wish MSE had been around 10 years ago, I'd have saved a lot of heartache, worry, stress and pain about money and debt.

rosyc_2

Feeling a little better today, had another sleepless night but arranged to see some houses in the next few days so maybe I can reduce my rent, have also been thinking about the kind things people have said on this thread and the night owls thread and beginning to see that not having my own home may not be the end of the world. It's just a little hard at the moment not to be insanely jealous of those who have a partner to share it all with. Just cannot get it out of my head. I know lots of nice people have said sometimes having a partner makes it more difficult or that love comes along when you least expect it, just finding it a little difficult to even anticipate at the moment. Can't imagine having my very own Mr Right.

boredofbeingathome

Glad you are feeling better. Don't worry about it so much, and every Mr.Wright has his flaws..there is no such thing as perfect, and most men would not want to be seen in that light. As you say he may be under your nose and you wouldn't know it.
Everything has its own time and place.

rosyc_2

Thank you, am currently looking at how to place on online dating ad, not sure if I'll pluck up the courage but a few people have mentioned that they've met people online and I suppose it doesn't really matter how you meet someone as long as you meet them!