How to have a baby without making debt?

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missbee wrote: »

I really can't believe it HAS to be house or baby!

I don't think we're saying it has to be house or baby. It just doesn't have to be THIS house. I think RoxieW has made some good points. When you have kids, you may want to be nearer to your parents, you may feel you're in the "wrong" school catchment area, the house/garden might be too big/small, etc. If you may end up moving anyway, it can't hurt to think about it now - especially if you can't sufficiently reduce your expenses any other way.

It is typical of life that those who think they'll go back to work end up being SAHMs and those who want to stay home end up racing back to work. However, it is always nicer to have made the choice yourself. At the moment, I fear your mortgage will be making the decision for you.

sooziesooz

Just thought I'd add my two penneth worth as again this is very relevant to me.

I too am the main wage earner at £45k and my OH is on £24k. I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant at the grand age of 31! I too thought like you and didn't want to wait until I was 35 and then find out we were having problems.

We've worked through our finances and yes it's going to be a struggle as I'm going to take a whole year off but we saved enough to cover the mortgage. We have no debt at the moment and with our income we've managed to save £1300 a month which is more than enough to cover our main payments while I'm on maternity.

We living on my OH's and half my wage at the moment and it's really easy. We love spending time together because we won't be able to do this as much once baby is here and generally spending time doing baby related stuff with family rather than spending on clothes/shoes/holidays etc.

We are making the sacrifce of moving - we've just bought a house close to my parents and both of us will be sacrificing London salaries but a nicer environment for our baby and a support network are far more important than the things I used to do prior to getting pregnant.

You don't need to give up your house it's just about striking a balance!

Good luck with whatever you decide!

missbee

Thanks to everyone with their suggestions. This is what I have done today:
1)Did Martin's budget planner - I was shocked at how much we overspend each month when everything is considered - e.g. adding up how much I spend on Xmas presents for my family! I was also appalled to add up my spending on food at Tesco (not counting the corner shop or husband's lunch) to find we spent nearly £500 last month!!! We VERY rarely go out so I was dilluding myself to think we are thrifty with food. Anyway, I clearly need to make cutbacks and have wotrked out I can save about £700 per month if I stop spending on yearly hols/DIY etc.
2) Reduced internet cost to £5 per month - I think this is pretty cheap
3) Applied to have a water meter fitted
4) Cancelled my income protection insurance5) Took a peek at Rightmove but didn't last long (Still, BIG move for me!!)
My husband and I are going to have a serious talk when he gets home.

I think some of the best advice has been for me to check what I'm entitled to so I know exactly and to really try to build up some savings before ML. I am still on the pill and so it is likely to be at least a year before a baby would come, and if I have problems who knows? A year (I hope) may be enough to cut back and save a few thousand. I am reasured greatly by thoses of you in my situation who have managed to do it.

RoxieW

good luck missbee - I too used to spend over £500 on groceries - I 've managed to get this down to £300 just by menu planning (ie only buying things specifically for each meal so you're not overbuying and throwing things out).
Thats for a family of 4.
Well done for having a look on rightmove!!

bandraoi

I'm going to say that moving house is not the answer.
Selling your house will cost you money, buying another house will cost you money, moving house will cost you money.

Selling your house is not the answer to a short term lack of income vs expenditure, unless the move is for reasons outside that expenditure.

I wouldn't move house for schools etc. until the child is approaching school age. You don't know what might happen or how the future will pan out. In four years alot can change in terms of your own priorities, the schools reputation, and when you have a child you'll be better able to identify what they need from a school.

arthur_dent_2

I am sorry but I don't subscribe to the I can't afford a child thing. Children are there to be loved if you really want one or two then you will manage. If I can survive on my household income (very low) then I am sure other people can too.

affordmylife

it so can be done.

my hubby and i are on a combined income of about £30,000 and have 5 children and a 6 bed house in a lovely area (with a huge mortgage) and we have a brilliant life. no of us go without anything.

i really totally cant see your problem at all.

jellyhead

put your wages into the entitledto website and see what tax credits it comes up with. i think you'd get £545 a year, doubled for the first 12 months but it may be on a tapered scale so i'm not too sure. the first £100 per week of maternity money can be ignored when making the income calculations iirc.

child benefit would be £18 per week for 1 child.

when you go back to work will your salary cover the childcare costs? will it just be while you'reon maternity leave that you think there will be a shortfall?

anyway, i know this will be unpopular on here .... i am a stay at home mum. i thought i would go back to work after having my 2 year old but then as my maternity leave expired i was pregnant again so i quit work. i lost that baby but i still didn't go back to work because i don't want to work until he is in school, and my husband agrees. so we are going into debt, running up an overdraft. i will repay it once i go back to work, but in the short term we are getting into debt in exchange for having me at home as a full time mum. this year i am also paying £400 for playgroup fees, but in September he will be 3 years old so he'll get it free.

our shortfall is nothing like yours though. but over 4 years i suppose i will build up a hefty overdraft.

Sarahlouz_2

affordmylife - all I can say is you must have either bought your house a very long time ago or live in an extremely cheap area. Even scrimping and saving I don't see how you can have a large mortgage and 6 bedrooms and 5 kids on £30k. Round here that kind of salary wouldn't even buy a one bed flat, so I don't think you can say that just because you've managed that everyone could!

leni

Although younger I often think like this! I've been broody for what seems like forever!

I've been with my partner for 6 and half years and have had a mortgage together for 5. Luckily we bought before the house increases so our house has doubled in value and our mortgage is very manageable compared to some friends.

We have a combined income of £48kish and have basic outgoings of one entire wage a month; this includes 2 car loans, broadband, mobiles, insurances, bills etc

I looked at my maternity policy and it states I get 6 weeks at 90% of my usual wage then only SMP:eek: This is TRULY scary and makes OH want to put TTC off even longer. Plus the fact he wants to get married before we start a family, but I don't even have an engagement ring yet, never mind planning a wedding (which we'd have to pay entirely ourselves)

I can therefore totally sympathise with you, but cuts have to be made! Theirs lots of ways to subsidise your reduced wages, mystery shopping, AVON rounds, Ann Summers Rep (I used to do this and made about £400 a month extra), QUIDCO, start a business

Good Luck