unsuitable housing

cindy100

I have been offered a 3 bed flat on the 4th floor in the worst area, i don't want to sound ungrateful but i feel so low and i am really dreading it, i am trying to appeal and have contacted a local councillor for advise but i'm still waiting to hear from them. I have been in temporary housing altogether for 9 years now and just want a stable and secure place for my kids to grow up, my partner and i are both studying atm and i don't want to be in social housing forever but until that time i would like my kids to be able to play outside and feel safe in my local community, i don't really know why i'm posting just wanted to get it off my chest as i can't stop crying and i'm getting really depresed.

JoJoB

Sorry to hear that Cindy, a friend of mine is in a similar position and you really have to fight tooth and nail - but still no guarantee you will get anywhere better. It may help your case to get statements from your doctor and health visitor (re your mental state concerning the move) and put pressure this way. Also contact shelter. Being in London probably doesn't do you any favours unfortunately, housing stock is so low there (and few places where your kids can play safely outside, even if you lived in a posh area tbh).

cindy100

Thanks JoJoB, Shelter told me to go to see my doctor as well, i would love a garden as i have one now and my kids are always outside, i just can't seem to shake off my depression, even my kids are giving me hugs and they are only 2 and 3

JoJoB

Would it be better to stay where you are now even if it's a bit cramped rather than go somewhere you are going to feel awful? it's a horrible choice to have but if you have a garden now maybe that would be better than the kids being cooped up. Again, even if you have lots of money in London it is difficult to find places with gardens so this isn't something you should count on. Hope you can find a way to get your head aorund things.

pinkshoes

Given how long people spend on the list waiting for a house, then perhaps you should be grateful you got one? Your other option is to stay put. A 2 bed flat is usually classified as big enough for 2 kids of that age, so you're lucky they offered you a 3 bed one! And now you want a garden??

Personally I think you should be grateful for what you've been offered. There's lots of lovely big parks in London for children to play in, and it'll do you good to get out in the fresh air!

cindy100

i would love to stay in my house but my landlady is selling it and i am being evicted, i am being offered a 3 bed as i have 3 children, who are 10, 3 and 2, the place they are moving me to is not near any "lovely big park" in fact all the local parks have been trashed and are full of beer cans and what not.

JoJoB

pinkshoes wrote: »

Personally I think you should be grateful for what you've been offered. There's lots of lovely big parks in London for children to play in, and it'll do you good to get out in the fresh air!

I was wondering when the first patronising person would come along. I'm sure you too would be grateful to be housed in a place where you would fear for the safety of your kids and not have anywhere to take them out to play that doesn't involve the needle and junkie obstacle course. It's true beggers can't be choosers and somehow cindy is going to have to get her head round things and figure out how to get through this without falling to pieces - but christ, can't she be allowed to feel a bit depressed about her change of circumstances for a bit without being told she should be grateful? ydes, it's good she won't be homeless, but some areas of London are like warzones and i too would be very worried and unhappy if my only option was to bring my kids up there. I suppose Damilola Taylor's parents should feel "grateful" he had a roof over his head too eh?

cindy100

Thanks again JoJoB i also thought someone would be negative but didn't think it would be so soon lol

pinkshoes

JoJoB wrote: »

I was wondering when the first patronising person would come along. I'm sure you too would be grateful to be housed in a place where you would fear for the safety of your kids and not have anywhere to take them out to play that doesn't involve the needle and junkie obstacle course. It's true beggers can't be choosers and somehow cindy is going to have to get her head round things and figure out how to get through this without falling to pieces - but christ, can't she be allowed to feel a bit depressed about her change of circumstances for a bit without being told she should be grateful? ydes, it's good she won't be homeless, but some areas of London are like warzones and i too would be very worried and unhappy if my only option was to bring my kids up there. I suppose Damilola Taylor's parents should feel "grateful" he had a roof over his head too eh?

So why live in London? If they're not working, then perhaps the OP and her OH should consider transferring their course to a different location (up north is cheaper!!) and swap city for town! Their kids could grow up in a nicer environment, they could probably get a 3 bed place with a garden, and can get jobs when they finish studying.

London has some shocking areas, which tends to be where the housing becomes available. The OP chose to have 3 kids and live in London, so they should still be grateful that they're being offered this house. There's probably people that would jump for joy at being offered that property!

London has buses, so no need to live NEAR a park!

Everyone makes their own choices in life.

cindy100

I live in London because this is where i was born and all my friends and family are here, I don't expect to be offered a palace but the thought of trying to get 2 littleones and a buggy and shopping up 4 flights of stairs is stressfull, the flat doesn't have a lift, I have considered moving out of London but i thought you had to have some connection to the area to be housed, like family or a job, in a few years time this might be an option but for now it doesn't seem possible

starbump

cindy100 wrote: »

i don't really know why i'm posting just wanted to get it off my chest as i can't stop crying and i'm getting really depresed.

I'm sorry your housing situation is making you feel unhappy. I find it helps to remember there are always people in worse situations - something to be positive about. It's only temporary, not forever. Being a tenant is better than a homeowner in debt and in danger of repossession. And so on. I hope you move again to somewhere nicer, sooner rather than later. ((hugs))