The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

Bingowings_2

Okay it’s time to come clean…

I’ve been following this thread since May, and have thought many times that I should post, but haven’t (now that I have it’s gonna be a long one so please forgive me). I don’t watch soaps, but in that time a really good one has been played out before my very eyes…
I’d like to thank MollyPolly for setting such a good example, ‘Dr’ Bismark for the sense that I’m yet to see, Jo, Winebox, and also yellowmonkey, and TNG, for being a top class lurkers, and BHB who has inspired me further to want to grow my own veg, or even get a few chickens or ducks, despite the fact that my mother won’t allow it as It’ll mean digging up some long standing fushias)

My reason for posting today… It’s my birthday, and I wanted to spend my 35th year and hopefully a few more with rather more sobriety than of late.

When I found a new job in April I vowed I would never go to work with a hangover, a complete change (going from 9-5 Mon – Friday job, to 12 hour shifts with no set ‘weekend’ and just random days off) so avoiding the dreaded 5am Monday morning feeling when you know you’re going to have to drag your sorry a**e to work. It’s happened three times now already.

A typical weekend used to be a litre of vodka - with OH, now I find myself drinking alone more often as on my sacred days off OH is working and I’m determind to ‘enjoy’ the day – so I drink. It used to be cider – just strongbow, not that white cider trash I used to drink when I was 15, but I put on far too many lbs…

The result – I waffle, I go for meals out in total blackout, (staggering) I wobble about more than should be expected of someone at noon or 4pm, and I’m asleep by 8pm with music channels still on the TV when I come round, about 2am, when sober I’m more a news and current affairs girl. I slurr, which I never used to do until I found I could ‘neck it’ quite quickly straight from the bottle. I find vodka all round the house because when I order in online, it doesn’t go into the bar area I fashioned from an old tool shed attached to the house, is cause my mother hides it from me. She fears a weekend with myself and OH drinking, it makes her miserable. For this reason I feel sad.

Written at 11.00am

Is now 15.00 and my mother (whom if you’ve not guessed already) I live with is mad at me – cause I got drunk again, I don’t meant to do it, it just happens, that voice says oooh one more won’t hurt, but it does, it hurts your family. Have read the Allen Carr book several times and fully understand what’s said, but I can only put it off for so long, after that is down to willpower of which I feel if absolutely none…

And yet when I know I’m working nights is no problem.. I know I’m going to have to be responsible and can be… It’s just the days alone that kill me.

lifesuckssometimes

Bingowings wrote: »

Okay it’s time to come clean…

I’ve been following this thread since May, and have thought many times that I should post, but haven’t (now that I have it’s gonna be a long one so please forgive me). I don’t watch soaps, but in that time a really good one has been played out before my very eyes…
I’d like to thank MollyPolly for setting such a good example, ‘Dr’ Bismark for the sense that I’m yet to see, Jo, Winebox, and also yellowmonkey, and TNG, for being a top class lurkers, and BHB who has inspired me further to want to grow my own veg, or even get a few chickens or ducks, despite the fact that my mother won’t allow it as It’ll mean digging up some long standing fushias)

My reason for posting today… It’s my birthday, and I wanted to spend my 35th year and hopefully a few more with rather more sobriety than of late.

When I found a new job in April I vowed I would never go to work with a hangover, a complete change (going from 9-5 Mon – Friday job, to 12 hour shifts with no set ‘weekend’ and just random days off) so avoiding the dreaded 5am Monday morning feeling when you know you’re going to have to drag your sorry a**e to work. It’s happened three times now already.

A typical weekend used to be a litre of vodka - with OH, now I find myself drinking alone more often as on my sacred days off OH is working and I’m determind to ‘enjoy’ the day – so I drink. It used to be cider – just strongbow, not that white cider trash I used to drink when I was 15, but I put on far too many lbs…

The result – I waffle, I go for meals out in total blackout, (staggering) I wobble about more than should be expected of someone at noon or 4pm, and I’m asleep by 8pm with music channels still on the TV when I come round, about 2am, when sober I’m more a news and current affairs girl. I slurr, which I never used to do until I found I could ‘neck it’ quite quickly straight from the bottle. I find vodka all round the house because when I order in online, it doesn’t go into the bar area I fashioned from an old tool shed attached to the house, is cause my mother hides it from me. She fears a weekend with myself and OH drinking, it makes her miserable. For this reason I feel sad.

Written at 11.00am

Is now 15.00 and my mother (whom if you’ve not guessed already) I live with is mad at me – cause I got drunk again, I don’t meant to do it, it just happens, that voice says oooh one more won’t hurt, but it does, it hurts your family. Have read the Allen Carr book several times and fully understand what’s said, but I can only put it off for so long, after that is down to willpower of which I feel if absolutely none…

And yet when I know I’m working nights is no problem.. I know I’m going to have to be responsible and can be… It’s just the days alone that kill me.

like dracula with blood you now have the taste for the drink if you are at the early stage. there is help. Also you have to face your demons the root cause for your drinking

sample_account

Bingowings wrote: »

Okay it’s time to come clean…

I’ve been following this thread since May, and have thought many times that I should post, but haven’t (now that I have it’s gonna be a long one so please forgive me). I don’t watch soaps, but in that time a really good one has been played out before my very eyes…
I’d like to thank MollyPolly for setting such a good example, ‘Dr’ Bismark for the sense that I’m yet to see, Jo, Winebox, and also yellowmonkey, and TNG, for being a top class lurkers, and BHB who has inspired me further to want to grow my own veg, or even get a few chickens or ducks, despite the fact that my mother won’t allow it as It’ll mean digging up some long standing fushias)

My reason for posting today… It’s my birthday, and I wanted to spend my 35th year and hopefully a few more with rather more sobriety than of late.

When I found a new job in April I vowed I would never go to work with a hangover, a complete change (going from 9-5 Mon – Friday job, to 12 hour shifts with no set ‘weekend’ and just random days off) so avoiding the dreaded 5am Monday morning feeling when you know you’re going to have to drag your sorry a**e to work. It’s happened three times now already.

A typical weekend used to be a litre of vodka - with OH, now I find myself drinking alone more often as on my sacred days off OH is working and I’m determind to ‘enjoy’ the day – so I drink. It used to be cider – just strongbow, not that white cider trash I used to drink when I was 15, but I put on far too many lbs…

The result – I waffle, I go for meals out in total blackout, (staggering) I wobble about more than should be expected of someone at noon or 4pm, and I’m asleep by 8pm with music channels still on the TV when I come round, about 2am, when sober I’m more a news and current affairs girl. I slurr, which I never used to do until I found I could ‘neck it’ quite quickly straight from the bottle. I find vodka all round the house because when I order in online, it doesn’t go into the bar area I fashioned from an old tool shed attached to the house, is cause my mother hides it from me. She fears a weekend with myself and OH drinking, it makes her miserable. For this reason I feel sad.

Written at 11.00am

Is now 15.00 and my mother (whom if you’ve not guessed already) I live with is mad at me – cause I got drunk again, I don’t meant to do it, it just happens, that voice says oooh one more won’t hurt, but it does, it hurts your family. Have read the Allen Carr book several times and fully understand what’s said, but I can only put it off for so long, after that is down to willpower of which I feel if absolutely none…

And yet when I know I’m working nights is no problem.. I know I’m going to have to be responsible and can be… It’s just the days alone that kill me.

Hi and welcome,......just got here myself.

You've been lurking since May and you've only just chosen to post.

I would imagine that's because you found it hard/ didn't like the idea of "coming clean".

This is a massive step. Don't underestimate how important it is that you made time to tell us all your situation.

Don't beat yourself up any more, just take another small step in the next few days.

Good luck

Bingowings_2

I thank you for your help:A

I guess I didn't post because I thought I could put it down to 'social' drinking, despite the angst and the sweats. But now when I wake I'm thinking of my next drink, I get home from nights at 07.15 I have a few to knock myself out ready for the next one. Is not where I want to be.

I've alway's felt I have an attictive (but not attractive) personality - I gave up the cannabis and stuff about 4 years ago but realise now that you should never subsistute one habit for another... hence my current predicament. I also lost my father in that time and because of the nature of his death - asbestos and the ensuing court case etc- maybe I didn't grieve, I just mucked in and got on with it as you do.

see waffling...

my 35th year starts tomorrow, and I will be strong, got my best friend, my mother on my side but it's not going to be easy

winebox

Hi to lifesucks & bingowings, welcome & very good luck, you're in the right place for help / support.

I'm late on here today cos when I was in work I had to - work! The whole time! (home at 2, got this far by 3.30 then it's been bedlam since then!)

There's some heavy stuff been posted on here in my absence; it's even shut me up. Am still thinking about a lot of it but meanwhile it's "lightweight lil" here.

I inadvertently fibbed when I said I hadn't gone 3 days AF this year - I have all sorts of notebooks around with my drinking & dieting written down & I did do 3 days in April!! However, today = AFD 4 which most certainly IS a record. And, thansk to Jo & Eselt & Bis for warnings earlier this week - if I wasn't joining in this thread I would have had a drink today - have done 3 days so am "OK", feel great, sun's out, loads of domestics to do round the house, spot on.
But thanks guys, I didn't. And it would have been silly if I had cos people kept dropping in & I would've been trying to hide my glass behind the kettle & not breathe on them etc.
BIG test tomorrow, TGIF. Always "my" night. If I was going out I would allow myself to, but I'm not & my aim is not to drink on my own so.......we'll see. I will drop in later loads to do now.

barshamhillbilly

lifesuckssometimes wrote: »

I CAN'T HELP THE WAY I LOOK

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

barshamhillbilly

Anyway - messed that one up again - bought one bottle of beer on the way home again! Needless to say - its down the hatch!

Tea time now - catch up later

BHB

barshamhillbilly

:hello: Welcome Bingowings

Bismarck

winebox wrote: »

BIG test tomorrow, TGIF. Always "my" night. If I was going out I would allow myself to, but I'm not & my aim is not to drink on my own so.......we'll see. I will drop in later loads to do now.

Could always make it "my night" to do something completely different....go out...try something new...see a film...do anything but sit waiting for the urge to overcome you...get a PC game and keep popping online to check up on the thread...the way things are going there's bound to be someone around!

lifesuckssometimes

Its good to know that there are some good people out there I'm glad i found this site I'm a bit jaded when it comes to people to much back stabbing i prefer the company of my family..or maybe I'm copping out of society. just got back from tesco in thetford got a nice bottle of wine could only last 4 days without a drink mind you it is my longest without.