DMP Mutual Support Thread (Part Three)

katyw

I'm very proud of everyone on here. I've been on my DMP nearly 3 years and just wish I'd found this site and everyone here then.....I wouldn't have paid out over £1000 in fees (God that's the first time I've added up how much Churchwood have charged me in that time). Thanks to everyone here though, I'm going to save £888 and become debt free in two years. :j
((((HUGS))))

loopylu36

sam89 wrote: »

Loopy, your post was fantastic. If your looking for a job have you thought of counselling? You have a very wise head.

Big hugs to all my DMP friends (that's everyone on the thread, by the way) for being a brilliant bunch of people :grouphug: .

Sam,
x.

Big hugs back Sam - you were one of the first people to respond to my initial posts and you were also one of those who didn't judge. Not that I didnt need to hear those things or need to know them, but I wasn't ready for it straight away - I already knew I was an idot !

Not sure how wise I am but I do like to help others if I can, I think I am quite generous in nature (and clearly too generous with banks' money!) so a "caring" job would probably suit me. However, when I went to Job Centre today, I was asked what I wanted to do and and was then told that it didn't really matter if I knew or not, cos they weren't careers advisers and I had to agree to look for work that I was qualified/able to do, rather than setting any "career goals". And all that for £59.75 per week - seriously how is anyone expected to live on that? I know it's not meant to be enough to encourage people to live off it, but even so.. I used to pay more than that in tax every week, not to mention National Insurance, VAT, Car tax, Council tax, tax on fuel - sorry gone off on a tagent now! And to say that they made me feel like a second class citizen is putting it mildly. :mad:

Anyway like I said kind of got off the point, so to get back on it - actually don't think I need to say anymore, cos I think everyone who's chipped in to this little discussion has kind of said it all. Keep up the good work!:A

jackie710

Hi,

It was brill to talk to CCCS today they didn't preach to me but sat back and listened and gave me loads of good advice especially on NOT letting balliffs into your house and only speak to them through your letter box!! Because if you let them in they then can make a list of all your expensive antiques and quality antique furniture!! (DREAM ON!) - to use as a way of payment. I have only a leather suite which is worth anything but I still owe £1500 on it!!
I would recommend them to anyone -
As probably with alot of yourselves this really tests your relationship with your husband/wife. We have a very strong relationship but because of all our financial pressure at home and our business it has tested us to the limit and nearly split us up lots of times over the past few months.
But, we are still together battling away and trying to keep positive. My husband at times has worked 3 days solid with no sleep to get jobs out for cash to pay bills!
I now have to sit down now and face my demons - all my debt- in goings, out goings, this is what I have been avoiding now for months- unopened letters as I know they are demands, or I open them and chuck them in a bag to which I carry from home to work again and again saying to myself 'tonight or at lunch I will sit down and go through it all - but I never do!! SURPRISE SURPRISE!
But, it had got to a point today where I could not avoid it anymore - as it had got so bad that I hadn't got enough money to even buy food for the week for us and the kids. It was rock bottom.
I have now taken the plunge and only done this with your help I am looking forward to the many months, well years really, of chatting with you all and being able, in time, to look back at this time and prehaps laugh at myself walking round for months with this plastic bag of opened/unopened demand letters hoping the problem will just disappear!!

From the bag lady!
Cheers

Toffee_Penny

Can I just ask what actually happens when setting up a DMP?

I have sent the template to my creditors with a token payment and all the relevant information back to CCCS, so then what happens?

I understand you get a welcome pack with a payment slip to pay at the PO with your first payment but then what?

do you have to talk to CCCS? if so what for? do they just ask how you are feeling?

sorry if they sound dumb questions but I just wanted to know what are the steps. thanks

Bigdi

Toffee Penny, I am with Payplan and they do things a bit differently but to the same end. I spoke to a lovely, understanding man in the first instance but some peeps on here have said that you can deal with cccs online (I think). Someone will be on here soon to answer your questions. Good luck!

Bigdi

Jackie, I too used to be a 'bag lady', or rather a big brown envelope lady which I would lose from time to time and that led to more late payments and charges - which I will be claiming back at some stage. The things we do when we can't think straight. I, like you, would always find some excuse for not dealing with my post and to go to the cash point for a statement left me frozen with fear. Now I have online banking and check my balance every day! The money I had to live on before was the credit that was available on my credit cards & I thought I had it sussed because there would always be some money knocking around somewhere. FOOL! What a delight to pay for food at the checkout now and know that my card will be accepted - debit card of course!

Ex-Spendaholic

Evening everyone

I have not been on here for a long long time. I was just thinking of you all today so thought I would look up the whole thread and see how you all are. I seen Teecee, Newleywed and Rayday posting whilst having a quick read back. What about Smilealot, 95Kelly, Sea78, Lonely, Joek and all the other old timers? Are they still about?

I'm just over 1 year into my DMP with CCCS now. I did mess up at one stage and miss a few payments but they were so good about everything and I got it back on track. A DMP is the best thing I ever did. I would recommend CCCS to everyone.

One year down the line the advice I would give to you all is:

Now matter how bad it all seems now - it will get better. Get on a DMP and your life will change.

Use cash instead of cheques, debit cards etc. If you use cash you can see where your money is going. It is not as easy parting with hard cash as it is to just swipe a card. Plus when you use cash when you hand it over that is the item paid for. You don't have to worry about it clearing your account whenever.

Cancel as many direct debits as you can. I have the bare minimum in DDs now. No longer does half the world have control of my account. That is what DDs are - giving other people control. Instead I use the bill payment facility to make payments. That way there is no risk of anyone requesting money and it not being there and you being subsequently charged. I even pay CCCS this way rather than the standing order.

Go Pay as You Go on as many things as you can - phone, electric, gas etc. That reduces the amount of bills coming through your door and you always know where you are with things.

Review your shopping habits. I used to buy all our groceries in M&S and Sainsburys. I truly believed that one supermarket was the same as another pricewise. Nowadays I have a love affair with Lidl, Iceland, Asda. I also buy all my meat from a local butcher and fruit and veg from a local greengrocer.

Clothes - You really don't need designer labels or brands. I was a label junkie for years. Nowadays I'm more likely to be found in the likes of Matalan and Tesco.

Quidco - join up and anything you are buying check to see if you can get cashback on it. It all adds up. I've had about £600 in the past year.

Charges - For the last 18 months I have so wanted to claim my charges. The trouble was I was scared. Not any more. I'm taking on each and every one of them. The money will go to my debts so that can only be a good thing.

For anyone who hasn't fallen asleep, I wish you all the best of luck. This is truly is a great place to come for help and support. Without this site and particularly this thread, I really don't know where I would be now.

Scottishmummy

Surprise surprise Ex-Spend. I took a break from here too and have only just returned tonight. Small world - at least in debt free wannabeeland. It's great to see familiar names still here. I was spending far too long on here and last visited about November but have still been getting martin's emails and decided the time was right to return. Will be good to catch up with everyone.

rayday2

loopylu36 wrote: »

You are right rayday - the main DFW board does have very strong opinions in terms of spending when in debt and when I first started posting, I was a little taken aback by some of those opinions. I thought that just by admitting my debt and asking how best to go about repaying it would give earn me some credit,(no pun intended ) but that wasn't necessarily what I got. For most of us the DMP route is intended to give us some quality of life back and I don't think that to that end, anyone should be vilified for spending £20 a month on Sky tv - it may be the only entertainment they get (getting a pay per view movie is a lot cheaper than the cinema at £7 a pop!) or getting their hair cut to cheer themselves up, or god forbid, "accidently" finding a bottle of wine in the trolley when they get to the checkout :rolleyes: Life is for living and we must all be careful not to lose sight of that along our (in some cases VERY long) journeys. Everyone here is great and a major support to one another without judging- at the end of the day, we are the ones living with these debts and anyone who isn't hasn't earned the right to judge. It must be lovely to be perfect and never make mistakes don't you think?

I completely agree with everything you say!

She says as she can't sleep because she is picking her puppy up (how dare I ? - actually he is cheaper than gym membership and brings quality of life to the five of us heh I can justify anything)

Seriously in the long term like we are if we don't have the odd release I think we could make ourselves ill. Its so easy to have a year of no unnecessary spending if that clears all your cards or loans but I know I couldn't do it for the five years it would take me. Also its not fair to inflict that on my children that would mean never spending on my daughter the whole time she is in secondary education!

They don't get a lot now and I teach them wise ways of achieving what they do want like buying from USA with the weak dollar or different shops etc and they never got toys (from us! grandparents are a law to themselves!) without special occasions anyway.

Yesterday someone at Youth Club asked me where I shopped and my daughter was with me she is 12 next month :eek: (not put that in writing before!) and she turned round and said mum shops everywhere Sainsburys, Morrisons, Tesco or Netto - we prefer Netto she gets more stuff!

Anyway I am waffling but I just wanted to quote your post really because I do worry about how some people are pounced on they post to say they are considering an IVA or DMP which is a huge decision and you get post your SOA you can always cut back - but its not always the answer...

rayday2

jackie710 wrote: »

Hi,

Just joined the forum today and started a thread on Debt management companies - thanks to you lot I am ditching the fee paying company(£597! plus pay them 5% fee of debt written off) and going with CCCS. Booked an appointment with CCCS to start a DMP. They got me hook line and sinker at my lowest! You all have saved my sanity with your support.
Can I join please as it is also going to be a long haul getting rid of my debt and we can keep each other focused on the goal - NO DEBT!

Cheers

You found us!

Thank you for looking us out - I have added you to the list on the front page you are member number 206.

I guarantee in two months time you will be hand holding people through the process (probably before then to be honest) it always amazes me the progression people make from the worry of setting up and two months later the change is remarkable and the support people offer.

I am not too good with how CCCS or Payplan work as I have never dealt with them but huge wealth of knowledge and personal experience on here.

It is not an easy ride a DMP but it is so much easier than the life I had before and the worry of taking money off this card and that to avoid charges here and there.

Throughly recommend when you feel up to it sorting some savings accounts up and even an ISA (Yorkshire Building Society are pretty good I set one up online with just a £10 - it is my emergency appliance breakdown or replacment account!) because you will have more to live off if your budget is right but you do need to get into a good habit ASAP for assigning money here and there for emergencies, Christmas etc