Repossession, Repossession, Repossession

churchrat

my post crossed with pinkshoes there-- so I'll reply now. Pinkshoes--you are being smug, although none of us like to hear negatives about ourselves and so find it hard to accept. I am not asking for your sympathy--perish the thought. All I ask is that posters do not automatically assume that all of us in debt did so to have great holidays and new"stuff" as a matter of fact I would love to have been in debt for that reason. We did end up in debt unexpectedly, thats the thing about unexpected costs--you don't expect them. Of course we had factored in child care, one of us not working, us becoming ill etc, what we hadn't thought about before DD became ill was the extra things, such as extra child care, travelling, higher food costs, the fact that my insurance did not cover me not working because of a childs long term illness, different clothes etc. I will admit though that our savings did not go far, but the fact that we had them meant that we could not get benefits for some time.
My point is this--if people come on here asking for advice then could you just answer the question without making assumptions about how they got into that situation? In fact, do you need to know at all? or do you just like to make sure you get you veiw across? We all know we should not have done whatever it was we did to get into our own respective messes--and if we ask for advice that is what we need, not someone saying "told you so, you are stupid" I have assumed, that this site is about moneysaving and mutual advice/support. Perhaps I was wrong.

mystic_trev

I know it's a hard thing to ask, but people should have at least 6 months savings to cover things like being made unemployed or sickness. Self employed should definately buy 'Critical illness' insurance.

Regarding repossessions, I saw a lot of it in the last crash. I had friends who lost their homes and some made bankrupt. I have to say that most of it was through greed, which is probably the way it'll be this time around! You cannot,however, but have sympathy for those (who through no fault of their own) have been made homeless, and I thank those who've shared their stories here, on the true cost of many who will be repossessed.

Phirefly

churchrat wrote: »

My point is this--if people come on here asking for advice then could you just answer the question without making assumptions about how they got into that situation? In fact, do you need to know at all? or do you just like to make sure you get you veiw across?

I've mixed feelings about this. The other day, someone was lamenting their situation, but initially neglected to mention they had a terminal illness. Naturally, this information put a whole new perspective on my reaction. (I think he did this on purpose by way of baiting but thats another argument)

What I'm saying is, without contextual information, people can only respond based on the facts you provide. And yes while theres no place for judgementalism or spite, one has to expect on a public forum no sympathy or understanding for factors you choose not to disclose.

emmy05

Do what my mum did, she took a third of my wages as rent and I didn't get it back to pay for a car or anything when I left home. I soon became aware that I needed to budget for things. It wasn't a shock when I left home & had to fend for myself, well except for the cooking & cleaning that I had to do.

thats a good idea, thanku xx hopefully he will appreciate us putting a bit of it away for his future, or maybe ill look into a decent savings account for him ..... sorry for gatecrashing this thread x

churchrat

I absolutly agree with Phirefly, there is no room for judgement or spite, and that is what I have seen on here. If someone is asking a direct question, can't that just be answered with calling people "stupid". I am lucky and found my own way through my debt problems before I came on here and have not needed to ask q's about my debt. I think if I had asked and been unlucky enough to have been answered by some of the posters on here I would probably just have given up. People ask for advice because for the most part they want to know how to deal with their problems--they don't need another kick, just the answer to the question.

I am glad that pinkshoes father has recovered from his by-pass (my husband used to run an ITU, perhaps they met!) and if we were in that situation we too would have coped. Its the unexpected that gets you, and nobody can ever be prepared for that.

I think that I do have a problem tho in that I expect other people to behave well and be polite, even on a public forum (how silly is that). I don't expect sympathy or even understanding, just honest advice. Or is the price of that advice other peoples strongly held opinions?

Jorgan_2

emmy05 wrote: »

thats a good idea, thanku xx hopefully he will appreciate us putting a bit of it away for his future, or maybe ill look into a decent savings account for him ..... sorry for gatecrashing this thread x

Emmy, the idea of taking the money, wasn't to give it back to me later on. If they had done that, I may not have appreciated what they were doing for me.

Jorgan_2

churchrat wrote: »

I think that I do have a problem tho in that I expect other people to behave well and be polite, even on a public forum (how silly is that). I don't expect sympathy or even understanding, just honest advice. Or is the price of that advice other peoples strongly held opinions?

Opinions are like backsides, everybody has one, nobody wants two. I don't think its silly to expect people to be polite on a forum, it says they should be in the forum etiquette sidebar.

People may feel they have given you 'honest advice' as they have not been in your situation. They can't always envisage themselves in a particular situation, likewise they may not be able to understand how you got in that situation. When someone posts something it may not be meant for you personally, it can be just a general observation.

So read all the advice & pick out what is relevant to you. Seeing something from anothers perspective can give you a clearer overall picture of your situation.

Hermia

pinkshoes wrote: »

I agree. They should teach financially responsiblity perhaps in schools, but this is also down to parents to set an example to their children. Those that see their parents buying on credit will tend to follow suit. Those that see their parents save hard for something will respect that and do the same.

They should also teach youngsters about how the economy/finance works (which would have been a lot more useful than the stuff I learnt in maths class). A friend of mine is facing repossession because her fixed rate mortgage has ended and she can't afford the mortgage with the higher interest rates. It never occurred to her to work out how much the repayments would cost with different interest rates (we have an accountant friend who would have done it for her). I can't believe that she never did any reading about mortgages before taking out a loan for so much money. I have another friend who is hugely in debt on his credit card. I asked him what the APR is and he didn't know what an APR was, let alone what the rate is?! And these two people are both educated to postgraduate level! ARG!

The level of financial education in this country is woeful and so few people seem to think ahead and consider what they would do if times get hard.

DGJsaver

There is large numbers of people who are not capable of understanding financial responsibilites
These are the people that think the teeth clenching ads like purple loans or ocean are a good idea


EDUCATION thats what`s needed , and i dont mean just for kids

I think people dont understand how debt spirals out of control so quickly , and i freely admit to having suffered from all of the above in my youth

Only in the last 3/4 years have i finally got a hold of the problems too much credit can give you
And im 31 , probably half way through life
Dan

emmy05

Emmy, the idea of taking the money, wasn't to give it back to me later on. If they had done that, I may not have appreciated what they were doing for me.

oh, with ya now lol

i couldnt really charge rent, i feel awful thinking about that tbh, i wasnt charged rent myself:s ...