Teenagers bedroom

Sharra

I wondered if anyone has suggestions about my 13 yo son's bedroom - it is a disgrace!
I know thats the case with most teenagers (I was pretty bad) but even when I bite the bullet and force him to tidy it, it is trashed again the next day. He doesn't seem to care about the mess at all.
It's not so much I mind it being a bit messy (it is his space after all), I just get very upset when I see brand new cds, books etc being trampled on, and clean clothes strewn all over the floor. I also worry that if there was a fire or a power cut he wouldn't get out of his room without tripping over something.
If anyone has managed to crack this problem I'd be really grateful for some suggestions.
Thanks

tooties

Hi Sharra,
you have my sympathy i have exactly the same problem myself i have three teenage sons still at home and their rooms are an environmental health risk!
i bit the bullett yesterday and went in and throughly cleaned them it was not pleasant but i couldnt stand it any longer.
my plan is to sneak in daily and have a quick tidy and remove dirty laundry.
I would be interested to hear if anyone else has a remedy
regards
tooties

daisymaisy123

Do like I did and don't venture in there because every time I did there was a full blown screaming match (me) and hubby would be shouted at for not sorting him out and make him listen to me bla bla bla .
So I just gave up going in there because it was more hassle than it was worth.
He is 23 now still lives like a slob but I tell him if he wants washing done leave it outside the door or it wont get done.
When it's a nice sunny day I get hubby to go in and open his curtains and window because if I do it I just lose all my good intentions not to blow my stack again.
What I can tell you is when he gets his own place it will be different story when he becomes like a clean freak like my oldest son, who now has his own kids and home.
daisy

looby-loo_2

Just the same here. My son loves going to carboots so after a mega tidy up last summer the deal is this - I remind him once on Saturday afternoon, I check the bedroom on Sunday morning and we don't leave for the carboot until the bedroom it tidy to my standard.


Does it work?













nooooop!!

destiny_star2006

i leave it and he eventaully does it when he wants friends around etc he 16 years old
it just annoys me as when ive done the washing for the week or wotever he will fill my basket up again with clothes hes had on bedroom floor for over a week and then expects it to be done straight away and im sick of explaining to him that i wash 2 days per week then iron onthe third so then he wants it washed and ironed straight away but it doesnt get done till the following week!
He does make more hard work for me but i dont really mind because he has to learn that im not doing things for him!
Also when i was giving him pocket money {dont now as he works} he would only get it if his room was kept nice and tidy and that worked a treat!
He was getting £10 per week and if the room wasnt clean he diddnt get it!
The first few times he thought i was joking and ignored my warning but soon got to grasps with it when he knew i was serious!
There was a few times when friday came and he maybe had forgotten and i would say to him paul your due your tenner today and the rooms a mess and he would say well if i do it tomorow can i have money now and i would say yes and it was always done the next daY! I think its all about compromise with teenagers they want to think that there are doing it for themselves and not for their parents!
Its harder now though as he has own job so i carnt get away with that anymore so i just leave it to grow and smell and when my family come over and maybe go and see him in his room there quite outspoken and tell him it stinks and is a mess this embarrases him!
So i would say its only messy now for 3 days out of the whole week and then he tidys around!
Each teenager is different so you got to hit them where it hurts where with my teenager it was pocket money

taplady

tooties wrote: »

Hi Sharra,
you have my sympathy i have exactly the same problem myself i have three teenage sons still at home and their rooms are an environmental health risk!
i bit the bullett yesterday and went in and throughly cleaned them it was not pleasant but i couldnt stand it any longer.
my plan is to sneak in daily and have a quick tidy and remove dirty laundry.
I would be interested to hear if anyone else has a remedy
regards
tooties

I do what you do and give it a quick tidy up daily. He makes the bed and puts laundry in the bin so not too bad compared to some. I am not prepared to let it get into a disgusting state as its my house and I dont want it to smell. I also get him to strip the bed weekly so I can wash the sheets but I usually make the bed up again.

My eldest has just moved into lodgings during the week and apparently he is quite tidy:rolleyes: never was at home!

I am trying to encourage the youngest to participate more than his brother did.

aimme13

I clicked on this link hoping to find a miracle cure:-) .........nothing works!! im still desperately trying and failing:-( im going to try the pocket money one and see how that works, the problem I have is grandparents give pocket money too so not sure if it will work but can only try.

And was my bedroom clean and tidy as a teenager???

of course not, it was my room so why should it bother my parents!! Im just waiting for mine to have their own kids and go through the same lol

beachbeth

Well, I have a 20 year old daughter who is just the same as all the above. Her room is disgusting! Dirty plates, glasses and mugs, dirty clothes and absolutely nothing is ever put away! New things she has bought or been given remain in the bags lying on her floor and important things such as passport, credit cards etc can be found amongst the pile too. She also waits until I reach the day when the linen basket is empty and I am up to date with the washing and then fills it up with the debris from her bedroom floor! Some of it is clean stuff that she just can't be bothered to put away.

When we carry on at her to clean up she always has a reason why she can't do it now and promises to do it later/tomorrow and then doesn't. The only way we can get her to do it is to absolutely blow up at her and have a blazing row followed by the threat that we will go in there with a bin bag and throw anything away that is lying on the floor!

Queenie

Three words: Shut-the-door!

Actually, your post goes deeper than an untidy room; seems you are really saying that he has no respect for property/belongings which costs you your hardearned!

My lads (12&13) have to bring their own washing down - I'll wash it; they have their own chores, one of which involves doing their own ironing. They are not in such a hurry to throw them on the floor when *they* have invested *their* time and energy into the process

They have pocket money each month and have to budget for spends/savings and gifts from that amount; they learn not only to budget, but the cost behind their *wants*.

Thirdly, there comes a point where you have to step back and let them learn their lessons the hard way. Besides, wait until he starts noticing girls and wants to bring them back to listen to CD's ... could almost be called "miraculous"

beemuzed

How this takes me back! I wavered between the screaming match approach and the leave it completely alone tack! Nothing, not even bribery, really worked - just the passing of time, a very long time! Now he has his own flat and family, and it always seems very clean and tidy when I visit. Try to keep cool and ask yourself whether it's really worth raising your stress levels over - it certainly won't be raising his!

aurora_borealis_2

Just leave them to it. Save your energy

They'll learn.