Investing in Us: Holidays, Health, and the Road to £150k

debtfreewannabe321

Afternoon all, things are going back to normal here slowly. DS went home around lunchtime. DD is at work today and I've had a bit of a tidy around. The food has gone down quite spectacularly considering there was only four of us here 😳 DS is weight training at the moment so has bulked up and eats for two at least, so I'm glad I went over the top with buying a few bits now 🙈🤣. We made sure that him and DD ate all the cheese boards, I'm not eating it and DP although he's gone back to some dairy isn't a big cheese person. That cleared out one shelf of the fridge at least 😆. I also sent DS back with some beers we had (I think we bought them for him anyway but honestly can't remember now). 

It was lovely seeing DS 💓.

DD is off to her dad's house tomorrow for a few days which I'm a bit worried about as there is already tension there with DD stating she doesn't want to go to dad's gf house and dad stating, tough. But hopefully it will all be ok.

DD and DS went to my sister's house and then my mum's house yesterday (and my other sister was there). I wasn't invited but honestly wasn't very bothered anyway, I'm still battling this cold which has moved to my chest and is being extremely stubborn and no amount of coughing is productive in helping to clear it. I know my brother in law is just finishing chemo and I know my other sister is poorly with her chest so I wouldn't have gone even if we were on good terms - which we're not really so *shrugs shoulders*. I was a little upset when they came home because my mother had made comments about the fact we must be very middle class now and rich if we can afford a car outright (DD cat S car that really wasn't that expensive) and live where we do (right on the edge of a council estate 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️). There were also comments about DD working, DS job (two of my nephews want to do the same job as ds1 now), about my job, and I suspect about DS2 but they weren't passed on to me. I feel there were insinuations made about my reasons for being with DP which I'm upset about and DD and DS knowing me didn't pass all the convo on. I'm pretty peeved to be honest and really very upset. I feel I've finally gotten to the core of why one sister and my own mum have stopped talking to me though. Jealousy, envy, whatever you want to call it. 🙁

Anyway, when they had gone out yesterday, DP and I camped out on the sofa for a bit yesterday in a nice quiet house, then DP went for a walk and took himself off for a pint on his own whilst I stayed at home and cleared up and bit and just enjoyed some quiet time. DP came back happy and commented how he'd never have been able to do such a thing as go for a walk on his own or go to a pub without his ex starting a fight. I thought to myself I wish you'd go more often so I can have half hour quiet time 🤣😆. Odd how we both still find things we are grateful for in our relationship when compared to our old lives. You would think after this amount of years we'd already have found all the gratefuls 🤗. When DD and DS came back I made sure to make a cheese board of all leftover cheese and crackers which got demolished, no one had fed them all day and they were too polite to ask for anything. I also made them pizza and other random bits that needed eating from the fridge. 

We popped to the shops this morning for a few bits we'd run out of. Including tissues for our cold. DP has come down with it really quite bad now too. Whilst my cold isn't that bad my chest still is which is really annoying me as I keep having random coughing fits. DP is napping but I can hear him coughing. I'm just hoping by new year it's gone. I haven't really been able to enjoy myself too much because I'm ready for bed with exhaustion by this sort of time every day... 
I've stopped taking the tincture. It's alcohol based and after some googling it turns out that could be the culprit of my spiked blood tests. So I've quit that for now. Upped my water. Trying to avoid naughty foods which is extremely hard with the amount we have in, although DS was sent off with a fair bit of it 🙈. 

I was given a cookbook for Christmas and it's from a restaurant we enjoyed last year. It's not completely veggie though so I'm sifting through it finding the things we enjoyed off the menu. I'm starting with a Bhel Puri so I got a few bits for it in the shop this morning and ordered a couple of bits off big river site too. It looked nice and easy and I never see this on our local Indian menu. If it all arrives tomorrow I'll make that for us perhaps as an accompaniment to a curry. 

Right it's nearly time to get DD so I best get a move on. I hope everyone is well (this cold is horrible) and has had a Christmas surrounded by loved ones. I'm grateful for the loved ones I did have around me but I had holes where others should have been. 

My wishes for 2026. And I hope anyone else who reads this who feels this deeply also finds that rest and reset. 

debtfreewannabe321

daisy_1571 said:

Glad you are having a nice chilled day.  Great idea to check your stats, writing it all down for the doc will hopefully get you both on a path to solving or further tests

Love foxy visitor

Dxx

Thanks @daisy_1571 💖🦊🙏🏻

KajiKita

That doesn’t sound fun with the DD visit already involving tensions and strife … I hope it goes okay for her and she doesn’t bring it home with her …

Glad you and DP got some quiet time, both together and apart. I’ve been with Mr KK 22+ years now and I’m still finding things to be grateful for 😊😉

I’d never heard of Behl Puri - had to google that 😊 Sounds good. 😀 You’ve reminded me, I still have the veggie epicure to read through and pick recipes from… 🤔

Hope you cold eases soon and I’m 100% with you on the rest and reset! Hope we both find it in 2026  ❤️ x

KK

Watty1

With you on the rest and reset.   Love the fox visitor  (The Fox Project is worth a mention here, it might not cover your area but they are a fabulous charity and offered me some great advice when a neighbour was shooting foxes and I wanted him to stop - he has chickens - The Fox Project explained how foxes pick their territory and were so helpful).

Hope the doctor can give you some help.   I did speak to someone privately about my blood test results when GP said all were fine - and - her advice was to give up all sugar and take some supplements - which really helped.  It being Christmas I am off that but I am promising myself I will go back to it when this period passes.

daisy_1571

it sounds like you've hit the nail on the head there, it certainly comes across as jealousy, im sorry your wider family aren't the sort to be happy for other family members successes but you won't change them so best ignoring it.  They don't see the years of hard work in jobs that were tough and living in building sites, to them you've got it easy in your fancy house so just ignore them.  Similarly you have no control over their thoughts about your relationship so ignore that too.  By ignoring rather than fretting you will also be showing your daughter how she can ignore the bits of future family relationships she has.  Hopefully she can just see her dad and come home again, no need surely for long drawn out visits if she isn't keen on visiting other parts of his life ?

Glad you are feeling settled and you enjoyed the festive period, a couple of days resting and sleeping and some daylight walks will hopefully get the cold out your system  😴 😀 

Dxxxxxx

debtfreewannabe321

Afternoon all. I shall try again at posting 😏😅 I keep leaving half finished posts as I get distracted with something or other 😅🙈. 

Up feeling slightly more refreshed than I have in a while this morning, so decided to take the bull by the horns and book an early morning gym session. There was me thinking everyone would be in bed. It seems everyone was in the gym, swimming pool and sauna instead 😅. Anyway I took it easy, I've relaxed my usual gym session waaaaay back down to level one again and, well, here we go again with it. I went on the treadmill only, walked on an incline as fast as I could without any pain or breathlessness causing me to cough so around 4 on the speed and 4 on the incline. I did 1.5 miles and then decided to stop as that took a fair while 🙈 and I wanted to go in the sauna too. DP did the rowing machine whilst I was walking. I listened to my audiobook which was nice as it drowned out the horrible music they play. 
We got back in time to take DD to work. 

After a few household chores we decided to mosey into town as I have an m&s voucher. I was after a nightgown, a nice fluffy soft one like DD has and I keep getting told off for nicking 🤣. I was also after a handbag. Either / or....There was lots on sale but none I really loved. 50% off lots of stuff so I wandered around every aisle. I found a nightgown I really liked but didn't want to buy because it wasn't in the sale (of course 🙄!) so I put It back. DP said just get It fgs, it's not your money see it as a gift from work. Get the one you want. So I picked it up again. He was right of course I should buy the one I like not the one I think is better value. I also managed to get two tops I like for every day use. And we had a little wander around the YS aisles in the food court. Picked up 6 ready made meals for the freezer. Only had to put £20 towards the whole shop 😃! Fab. 

I also bought a book. DS bought me one I wanted but I hadn't read the one before it (it's a series 🙈) so I bought the one before the one he bought me 😊. 

Also picked up a handbag half price in accessorise for £15. All spends came out of Xmas money or my pocket money for Jan / vouchers. 

Quite a successful trip and I already have my nightgown on 🥰 and my book next to me to start on. 
DD finishes work soon. Ex must be on his way up. I have DS2 presents in a bag ready for DD to take. I've wrapped last minute presents she bought for ex and step sis (actually DP did bless him) and she's hopefully ready to go when he gets here because she does like to dawdle which makes the handover awkward AF at the front door..I intend to not even go anywhere near the front door today, DP will do it. I don't think I can hold my tongue if ex was to say something. 😏

DP is going to join me on a detox. I am going to start next week so that most detox symptoms will be gone by the time I start the new job (always get headaches when I withdraw from sugar or caffeine). I was going to do it alone but he wants to do it too. So hopefully that will spur me on to stick to it! 

debtfreewannabe321

daisy_1571 said:

it sounds like you've hit the nail on the head there, it certainly comes across as jealousy, im sorry your wider family aren't the sort to be happy for other family members successes but you won't change them so best ignoring it.  They don't see the years of hard work in jobs that were tough and living in building sites, to them you've got it easy in your fancy house so just ignore them.  Similarly you have no control over their thoughts about your relationship so ignore that too.  By ignoring rather than fretting you will also be showing your daughter how she can ignore the bits of future family relationships she has.  Hopefully she can just see her dad and come home again, no need surely for long drawn out visits if she isn't keen on visiting other parts of his life ?

Glad you are feeling settled and you enjoyed the festive period, a couple of days resting and sleeping and some daylight walks will hopefully get the cold out your system  😴 😀 

Dxxxxxx

@daisy_1571 Tried the gym instead as my last walk outside in the cold triggered asthma which triggered coughing and me nearly having wet myself and a massive headache 🤣🙈. 
We've said to DD if she's had enough to let us know...so we will see how she goes. I'm a little upset about my family but it makes sense. I couldn't see what else I had done considering all I ever did was favours for everyone...

debtfreewannabe321

Watty1 said:

With you on the rest and reset.   Love the fox visitor  (The Fox Project is worth a mention here, it might not cover your area but they are a fabulous charity and offered me some great advice when a neighbour was shooting foxes and I wanted him to stop - he has chickens - The Fox Project explained how foxes pick their territory and were so helpful).

Hope the doctor can give you some help.   I did speak to someone privately about my blood test results when GP said all were fine - and - her advice was to give up all sugar and take some supplements - which really helped.  It being Christmas I am off that but I am promising myself I will go back to it when this period passes.

@watty1 thanks I will look them up! We have chickens in a neighbours garden so we think they may be here for them 🙈 puts me off getting some now too. 
DP and I have mentioned going private if we get no joy with doc on NHS because something is not right and I'm fed up of being ignored or told everything is ok when it's not. 

debtfreewannabe321

KajiKita said:

That doesn’t sound fun with the DD visit already involving tensions and strife … I hope it goes okay for her and she doesn’t bring it home with her …

Glad you and DP got some quiet time, both together and apart. I’ve been with Mr KK 22+ years now and I’m still finding things to be grateful for 😊😉

I’d never heard of Behl Puri - had to google that 😊 Sounds good. 😀 You’ve reminded me, I still have the veggie epicure to read through and pick recipes from… 🤔

Hope you cold eases soon and I’m 100% with you on the rest and reset! Hope we both find it in 2026  ❤️ x

KK

@kajikita all my ingredients have arrived so I will be making that Bhel later!! Will let you know how it tastes. 
I hope the cold goes too I'm done with it now. 

teapot2

When I lived in London we used to go to a lovely veggie Indian restaurant near us and Bhel Puri was one of my favourite sides.  Crunchy and with umami flavours, yum.