Money Moral Dilemma: Should I replace my son's Pokémon encyclopaedia that I gave away?

MSE_Sarah

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

As our kids are getting older, we had a massive clear out of toys, clothes and books that they no longer use. I asked my son, aged nine, to go through them and pull out anything he wanted to keep, but rather than checking, he said he knew there was nothing he wanted. One of the things I gave away was his Pokémon encyclopaedia, which it turns out he still liked and used, so he's very sad. Should I replace it, or is this the right time for him to learn a lesson?

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elsien

Does he get pocket money? Maybe deciding whether he wants to spend his pocket money on buying another one will help him to decide how important it actually is for him. 

jim1999

I would turn it into an activity together, have a look around and see if you can find one second-hand that looks like it's in good condition and will save a bit vs buying new.  Or look around in some bookshops / charity bookshops and see what you can find.  If they have pocket money this is even easier, perhaps they can contribute some / all of the cost.

On the one hand, at that age it's really easy to make snap judgements on things like "No I don't need any of that", and it's easy to take things much more emotionally as well than an adult would perceive it.  So I think it's a good idea to try to turn that sadness into something positive and help to fix it.

But equally, if something goes wrong they need to se that it has an impact and you can't always magic away the consequences.

So for me, taking a bit of time to find one that's maybe not in perfect condition might be a good way of teaching that lesson in a positive way.

Spendless

I would replace but only give it as a birthday or Xmas present. That way he gets back something beloved but has to wait so learns to check in future. 

Emerion

I wouldn’t just replace it, or you’re teaching him not to think about his decisions, because someone will always fix his mistakes for him. The other suggestions about replacing it as a Christmas gift, or helping him to find a good second hand one are both great ideas. 

keithyno.1

I just checked on Amazon, they're selling the Pokémon Encyclopaedia: Updated and Expanded 2024 edition for £14.63. The kid made a mistake, just get him a new one. 

ffcforever

Absolutely - could be worth a small fortune in the years to come!

gloriouslyhappy

keithyno.1 said:

I just checked on Amazon, they're selling the Pokémon Encyclopaedia: Updated and Expanded 2024 edition for £14.63. The kid made a mistake, just get him a new one. 

Yes, the boy made a mistake but buying the Amazon one for him would teach him nothing. Does he get pocket money or have a savings account? Let him pay for it himself, and hopefully he’ll learn a valuable lesson.

akbrooker

He's 9 and we cannot really expect a 9 year old to stop whatever they're doing to think carefully about all their toys and books and belongings and remember everything important immediately.  An adult would most likely say they need to thnk about it, even take a look in the loft... Replace it - it's a lesson for an older person...

Shell1989

Unless he wants to buy it back for himself using his own pocket money / birthday money, I'd let this one be a lesson. Yes, 9 years old is young, but he's not too young to have sorted through and taken it out. Asking him to use his own money will determine exactly how much he really likes and uses it...

Ed264

If you can get another for under £15 as mentioned earlier, just do it and give the boy a bit of a lecture about checking properly in the future. It's not a big deal, and everyone can put it down to experience.