Money Moral Dilemma: Should I pay in full for a break with friends when I can only stay for half?

MSE_Laura_F

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

Six friends and I have hired a barge for a seven-day Easter break for many years, with the cost divided equally between us. Last year, I could only stay for three nights of the trip, so I suggested that I should pay a bit less. My friends disagreed, deciding that - as it was my decision to leave early - I'd have to pay my full share. I couldn't stay any longer than three nights this year, so I didn't join the trip as I object to paying the full cost. Am I right or wrong in thinking I shouldn't have to?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value. Remember that behind each dilemma there is a real person so, as the forum rules say, please keep it kind and keep it clean.

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Mark_d

You agreed to the trip so you should pay your full share.  No-one else should have to pay more than the price they agreed, as a result of your plans changing.

Newly_retired

At best you might hope for small refund for food you won’t be eating, that is if everyone has already paid into a kitty up front, but the bulk of the cost is the boat hire. You must expect to pay your fair share of that, even if you curtail your stay.

CrazyBee787

Think of it this way, can your friends get someone to come half way through to make up your decision to leave early...No! then you have your answer!

keithyno.1

CrazyBee787 said:

Think of it this way, can your friends get someone to come half way through to make up your decision to leave early...No! then you have your answer!

This says it all! ⬆️

Rd1994

Why can’t you choose a date when you can all go for the whole time? Are the choosing the date without your say so? I think you should pay the full amount unless they are not giving you the option of dates - because they can’t find someone else to take the room when you are gone. 

dumpster_fire2025

MSE_Laura_F said:

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

Six friends and I have hired a barge for a seven-day Easter break for many years, with the cost divided equally between us. Last year, I could only stay for three nights of the trip, so I suggested that I should pay a bit less. My friends disagreed, deciding that - as it was my decision to leave early - I'd have to pay my full share. I couldn't stay any longer than three nights this year, so I didn't join the trip as I object to paying the full cost. Am I right or wrong in thinking I shouldn't have to?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value. Remember that behind each dilemma there is a real person so, as the forum rules say, please keep it kind and keep it clean.

 If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.
 Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.
 View past Money Moral Dilemmas.

It's entirely up to you to negotiate this with your friends. There isn't really a "do I or do I not have to" element to it.

If your friends are happy for you to turn up for half the holiday, leave and pay half then so be it. If they want you to pay for the entire trip regardless, that's fine too.

They may simply just want to find another person who will be there for the entire trip and therefore pay the full amount, meaning they're not paying more for the trip than the feel they ought to. Again, that is also fine.

This isn't really an MMD at all, given that this has already been decided and you've not actually given them any money.

Missy15

If it was your decision last year to leave early then they were right, if it was your choice to not stay for more than 3 nights this year, you were right not to go.
Why book for for a 6 night trip, if you all want to go together? Do you even want to spend time with your friends?
Either you get your act together for next Easter, or you all go  together for less time if it's possible, or as 3rd option all go away at a different time of the year!

Somersetshorty

If it is something that was already agreed and each paying the same amount then that is fair enough.
Going forward, maybe have a discussion prior to the booking of next year's trip and do what our group of 8 friends do. Not everyone can do the whole trip so we count how many days each person can arrend and work out the cost per day from the total cost of the holiday
We find this a great compromise so we can all enjoy each other's company without anyone having to miss out on a much needed break away.
We like to be mindful of everyone's personal circumstances and inclusion is a great thing-life is tough enough at the best of times. 

Marcon

Why is this a dilemma? Your friends have told you the terms and you simply decide whether or not you want to access them.

bikaga

I've organised a trip where the only friends with a kid of school age couldn't stay as long - it was a 3 night minimum rental but they could only make Fri-Sun. I offered for them to pay less, but they insisted on paying as much as the others.

I'd be happy for the people staying longer to pay a bit more, but that would need to be agreed upfront, before booking, and it'd have to be for a good reason (otherwise why agree to a trip you can only make half of).

But likewise I don't know your friends, the relationships, if they're maybe short of cash - I can see both sides, so best not to go if you don't think it's worth the full amount (or you can't afford it).