Teetering on the brink

daisy_1571

Lol, ill watch the films but yes, i dont want to see it happen in your life! (Again)

Dxxx

EatingBeans

More good news - I went to my Blood Pressure follow up appointment which I was previously told was going to be the absolute latest start date for taking medication, and guess what, I no longer need it! 🎉 After three tries it was recorded as 121/92. The nurse was pretty amazed, especially as the second try actually gave a bottom number of 89! It obviously still needs a bit of work, but after just 4 weeks of starting the new meds for the Trigeminal neuralgia, and finally being able to get up and move around, I am pretty darn pleased with that. 😁 I am still booked in to check my heart on Thursday and apparently she is going to check my blood pressure again to be sure it is staying lower but as far as I am concerned today shows that I am able to lower it from lifestyle changes and I would much rather keep trying that way than take more drugs.

And on the note of exercising more, I now have to go shift about 10 bags of compost/top soil from my van to the back garden. That should get my heart pumping! Most people would probably have ordered a bulk delivery and used a wheelbarrow for the quantity I’ve got but sadly that is just not possible where I live as there is no where to drop it. Usually dd2 would help - she helped put them in the van in the first place - but now she is at college I have to do it by myself. It needs doing asap as I’ve bought some used pallet collars off ebay to make the raised beds that all the compost is for, and they need picking up by 4pm. It’s all very exciting though. I can’t wait to have somewhere to finally plant vegetables in my garden!

Cherryfudge

That's great news on the BP, well done!

badmemory

From what I have experienced just being in pain pushes your blood pressure up, so it is only logical that if the pain is reduced then the blood pressure will be too. Good that the TN meds are working so well.

EatingBeans

See the nurse suggested that - that being in pain could have been the cause of the previous high blood pressure. I left her to think that as I didn’t want to admit that literally as I sat there my TN was firing in my face. 😬 It wasn’t cripplingly bad but it was definitely painful rather than just uncomfortable and I’d sat in the waiting room holding my face to try and warm it to reduce the intensity. The thing is, I am pretty used to being in pain every day. I’m no longer convinced that the new tablets have stopped the pain any better than the old one did but the one thing it has done is reduce all the side effects. Without the side effects I am able to get up out of bed and actually do stuff! Despite the pain I am able to enjoy life again and honestly, I believe that is why my blood pressure has gone down. Probably the same mechanism that causes pain to raise blood pressure in some people (I suspect cortisol levels), it’s just if I waited to be pain free to be happy I would spend most of my life miserable. The previous tablets caused depression as one of the side effects, without it I have the mental strength to get on with enjoying life regardless and that’s good enough for me. 😁

EatingBeans

Back at work today and tomorrow. I know it is only two days but it seems like such an inconvenience as it is stopping me getting on with things. 😬 Yes, I do appreciate that most people work 5 days a week, but equally, most people don’t have to stay locked up in their house 6 months of the year.

Yesterday I managed to shift all of the compost and completely empty the van but it got too late to collect the pallet collars. That is now a job for Thursday but dd2 said she will help me with them during her break from college. 😊 Fortunately the weather is looking glorious Thursday, Friday and Saturday so I should hopefully be able to shift all of the broken concrete and gravel from where the blocks are to go, build and fill the beds and see how much more compost I need. 😬

Once that is done I really want to make a start on the van. I have found a guy selling used sheets of plywood so hopefully I will be able to grab some of those before the week is out and then I think I have most things to kick that off. I really want to be ready to take dd2 off camping as soon as she finishes her exams (before summer holidays hits properly), and that is going to be a tall ask. If I can at least get the van cleaned and the roof sorted in the next week that would be good, but before then I need to tick off work and raised beds.

Thinking ahead, I have been recording what I have been doing so fingers crossed I can still turn it all into YouTube videos as planned, just as soon as I have some spare time! At this rate I will spend 6 months getting out and about living life and recording, then the winter 6 months editing it all! 🤣 I wouldn’t mind that tbh but it might make it a bit more of a challenge. 🤷‍♀️

EatingBeans

Work has officially been ticked off for the week. 🎉 I am now super tired and very ready for bed tonight, but equally very excited for the next few days. I know there is going to be quite a bit of hard work involved but somehow hard work that you choose to do (rather than being paid to do), just doesn’t give that ‘Monday morning of dread’ type feeling. Instead, despite currently feeling exhausted, I still can’t wait to be able to make a start. In my ideal world I would love to find a way to monetise the work I actually enjoy - I can but dream!

Now I know that this is supposed to be a debt free diary and currently it is turning into a diary of spending instead (whoops) but can I just say that I absolutely love my new rule of being able to buy new clothes from the sale money of clothes I sell. I genuinely think this will save money over time, and it will help me finally declutter my home of all the bags of old clothes I have. I am being less fussy about the money I am asking for each item (favouring getting rid of things quickly rather than at the highest value) and only once I have enough to cover the full cost of a new item including postage do I let myself buy something new. Honestly, I so very rarely buy myself any new clothes that it seems super extravagant but in reality I really do need some new clothes. It says something when I have so few that I often find myself wfh wearing pj bottoms that I’ve had for over 15 years, and are a size 12 when I am a size 16 and the only reason they ‘fit’ is because the elastic waistband has completely failed and the fabric has detached from the elastic almost a quarter of the way around. It really is time to buy some more clothes and now I can effectively do it for free I get to treat myself. 😁 I have only actually bought two things so far but just the Vintage window shopping and favouriting is giving me so much joy knowing that I can actually treat myself. You never know, maybe one day I will actually have a wardrobe full of clothes that I actually like and fits me! 😱

EatingBeans

How can it be lunch time already?! I got up early as planned and started moving all the rubble out the way in preparation for the raised beds. Then off I went to pick up dd2 and collect the pallet collars. Turned out I didn’t need a hand in the end as the very kind man at the other end brought them right up to my van using his forklift and then proceeded to pop them all in the back for me! Currently all but one are still in the van as I didn’t see the point in getting them all out until the ground is 100% prepared and whilst I have moved the big blocks of concrete there is now a whole lot of gravel to shovel. 😞 Quite honestly I may just level off where the edge of the beds will sit evict the weeds and leave all the rest exactly where it is. The raised beds need to be quite deep anyway to stop the dogs jumping on them during their zoomies so I’m ok with a bit left at the bottom. I just keep telling myself that it will aid drainage so half a job is just fine on this occasion. The reality is noone will see it and the plants should grow just fine either way. I feel like after 3 years of shovelling gravel from one spot in the garden to another, I am about over it! The ‘nice’ grey top gravel I am happy to reuse as a path but the old mixed ‘golden-ish’ gravel that was the bottom layer of the gravel lasagna covering the entire garden, I just want to hide as much as possible. Frankly I am tempted to add another pallet collar to the height of the raised beds and scoop the giant pile of ‘golden-ish’ gravel into it! I am sure I would probably regret it at a later date but maybe one raised bed done this way would be ok because I could just grow shallow rooted crops in it? 🤔 Decisions decisions!

EatingBeans

Today has been another day of gravel shovelling, fetching the pallet collars from the van and making a start on painting them. I am exhausted again but it will be worth it. Once painted it should just be a case of slot them together and start filling them up with compost. Then finally, after almost two years of gravel shovelling I will finally be able to level out the last bit and I will have a lovely path in all the right places and all in one colour! Honestly, I think the neighbours will be glad too as it will finally look more like a garden again without mounds of gravel everywhere. Would I do it again if I knew at the beginning how difficult it would prove to be? Absolutely, the transform is totally worth it. But would I ever buy another house in future that had a garden fully covered in gravel? Hell no! I have learnt my lesson! Just because I would never dream of laying landscape fabric over a whole garden of rubble mixed with gravel, slabs and rubbish, then throwing tonnes of gravel on top just to sell the house, doesn’t mean someone else wouldn’t! Not that I plan on moving any time soon. As my daughter pointed out today, I can’t move now I’ve put so much effort into the garden. Hell, even the pond works now! 😁

cbsexec

if your raised beds are going to end up quite deep you can save on compost by using a bottom layer of cardboard and twigs etc (some good videos on Facebook/instagram) May save you a bit as it’s surprising how much compost you will use