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Money Moral Dilemma: Should I pay to have the bike my ex-husband got our son serviced?

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  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 35,810 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Savvy Shopper!
    This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

    My ex-husband bought our son a second-hand bike that cost £180 for Christmas the year before last. Since then it's been badly damaged a couple of times, and I've paid for it to be fixed professionally. My ex now wants the bike back to sell, saying the money he gets will go into a savings account he's set up for our son. Yet he wants me to pay to have the bike serviced again so it can be sold - should I do it? I've probably paid more for the bike now than my ex did.

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  • THV
    THV Posts: 6 Forumite
    Third Anniversary First Post
    I'd tell him to get lost. It's your sons bike. He can't take a present back.
  • tastyfish
    tastyfish Posts: 96 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    First of all, it's your sons bike not your ex's. Secondly, you are not going to get much for a £180 second hand bike, maybe £30-40. Best give it to a charity who may have the experts to fix it.
  • RickyAH
    RickyAH Posts: 6 Forumite
    Third Anniversary First Post
    Similar thing happened to me, when my parents divorced my mother took most of my stuff, work tools, LP records, and an expensive 21st birthday present, both my parents paid for. I said if it's yours take it, if its mine leave it alone.
    She must have realised her error and left just my present there, on the floor.
    I never saw or spoke to her ever again.  
     A gift does not come with strings, so ''on yer bike matey'' is my reply.
  • CapeTown
    CapeTown Posts: 145 Forumite
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Posts Photogenic Name Dropper
    Lat time I had a bike serviced it cost over £100 and that was years ago. Teach your son how to service it himself via YouTube.  Skill for life. My daughter does her own. Saves money.
  • There's no clue to how old your son is but has he been consulted? Has he outgrown the bike, does he want a new bike and if so could this old bike be put towards a new one? The bike was already second hand when your ex bought it so therefore it is unlikely that a service will add much value, besides which it was a gift and therefore your husband has no claim on it in my opinion. You have done your bit by keeping the bike in good condition for your son's safety. Well done. There is a reason why this man is your ex!!!!!
  • phin
    phin Posts: 6 Forumite
    Fifth Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    This is utterly ridiculous. 
    1. Legally the bike belongs to your son
    2. If your son wanted to give him the bike back to sell, he (or you) would be under no obligation to repair it first.

    I agree with @mira77 - tell him to do one. And maybe consider why you think this request would be even half way reasonable in the first place
  • I'm with Mira77, only EVEN LOUDER, Triple Underlined, Bold Print and Font Size 72! F R O!
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0 Newbie
    Fourth Anniversary 10 Posts
    edited 24 April 2024 at 3:33PM
    Absolutely  -  NOT!  Your son damaged the bike, you paid for the repairs, that's reasonable if you'd agreed to accept the responsibility when your ex bought the bike, but paying to have it serviced so that it can be sold (whether or not your son benefits)?  Certainly not.  Your ex can have it prepared for sale if he wants to, it's his choice, it isn't your responsibility.  Your ex should always consult you before making decisions that affect your son, so things such as these could have been agreed then.  If he didn't get an agreement, then he should pay up.
  • JainEm
    JainEm Posts: 13 Forumite
    Sixth Anniversary 10 Posts
    Cambsmum said:
    The bike was a Christmas present. It belongs to your son! It is up to him what happens to it.
    The question about servicing the bike is irrelevant. I agree with others that gifted to your son makes the bike his property. It's his decision what happens to it - with your input if he's of an age to need it.
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