Money Moral Dilemma: Should I have got my wife a second Christmas gift, as her first one was free?

MSE_Kelvin

This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

I got my wife a reasonably expensive coat for Christmas, from a well-known department store. I submitted my loyalty card when paying, and was told that I had nothing to pay - the loyalty scheme gives one customer their purchase for free every week in each store. But as I got my wife's present for free, should I have bought her a second one? And should she feel entitled to another present?

Unfortunately the MSE team can't answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be a point of debate and discussed at face value. Remember that behind each dilemma there is a real person so, as the forum rules say, please keep it kind and keep it clean.

If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.
Got a Money Moral Dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.

JGB1955

'No' and 'No'.  It's the thought that counts.

bluelad1927

Does your wife know you got the coat for free? Is she feeling entitled to another gift

Nebbit

Surely paying for an extra gift is not within the spirit of 'Money Saving'

itsthelittlethings

Maybe get her a little something if your finances are separate. If not, she’ll benefit as well.

Pollycat

Lordy!
Not another nonsense MMD.
Just talk to her.
Tell her you chose a 'reasonably expensive coat' for your Christmas gift to her and it cost you nothing.
See what she says.
FHS - she got a gift.

HillStreetBlues

Depends if your girlfriend's present was also free.

kimwp

Does loving someone come with a price tag?

Whitepoppy

Did you tell her you got the coat free? If you didn’t then just keep quiet and leave things the way they are. You could buy her a little gift later on in the year just because you love her. If you did tell her, her reaction will tell you whether you should buy her another gift or not. But you know your wife whether is materialistic or not so only you can decide whether or not you should buy her an extra gift. 

IvonH

What?  Why?  First of all, I don't necessarily think you needed to have told your wife - after all, you went to the shop prepared to pay for the coat.  Secondly and more importantly, gifts are not about the money.  They are about the thought that went into them and the effort.
My most treasured possession is a love spoon my husband made me years ago, when we were poor as church mice.  He did not have any tools, just an old knife.  And the wood was a piece of scrap wood.  But he managed to get a twist-effect, our initials in a heart and those of our 3 children underneath...  I melt inside every time I see it - 30 years later. That's what presents should be about, not the money.

maff_the_snaff

This is almost like asking “if I bought a present with money I won, then does it really count as a present?”.

In this imagined scenario, the fella has participated in a scheme which allows for a prize to be won when you make a purchase.  The prize is of monetary value equivalent to the item purchased.  Can’t see the issue. Bought a coat and won a prize.  Take the win and carry on worrying about real problems.