The Diary Of Onebrokelady Aged 60 And A Half

in_need_of_direction

So sorry to hear your news.please take comfort that you had tried everything you could.

Cloth_of_Gold

So sorry to hear about B. You gave a great life though and did absolutely everything to keep her going for as long as you could, and you could not possibly have been more loving or caring. I hope that in time you can focus mainly on all the happy times you had together.

Muddy_Walker

I’ve only just caught up - so incredibly sorry to hear about B ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ it is truly heartbreaking and we feel dreadful when it happens but you were the best mum ever to her and she would never have forgotten that. Xxxxx

milann

Just thinking about you and sending my best 👋

Seasidegal58

Having caught up with your posts, let me say how sorry I am to hear the sad news of little B. 😞. You must be heartbroken. Our pets are so special to us. Although I haven't had a dog of my own for some years, I am currently staying with my DD and love her two like my own so I know what you must be feeling. 

Sending hugs. ❤️

milann

Just checking in to say hi and hope you’re ok OBL 

Seasidegal58

Me too....

Onebrokelady

Thank you for the lovely comments about B everyone ❤️ I m sorry I haven’t posted but I just didn’t feel like posting anything. I am slowly coming to terms with her not being here any more but it’s very strange. I spend all my time at home on my own so I used to speak to her constantly and it’s this that is catching me out. I just keep forgetting she isn’t here 😟but I’ve decided she must be somewhere so if I forget it doesn’t matter. 

The  cats have been very cuddly so I still have the feel of someone fluffy to cuddle. It’s also amazing how your brain gets into a routine and then struggles when that routine stops. I took her out everyday twice a day for ten years and I still keep thinking need to take her out. I also didn’t realise how stressful the last few months have been and while I don’t feel relieved it’s over I do feel a lot calmer and I’m sleeping better because I’m not worrying about how she is or if I’m doing the right thing. Im now just waiting for her ashes to come back to the vets so I can pick them up.
DD2 has been very upset but hopefully is coming to terms with it now. We went for a walk last weekend to a place where we took B and poor DD just cried when we got there. I suggested trying a different route but she wanted to carry on. I won’t be able to go to the beach I don’t think because that was Bs absolute favourite place ( mainly because of the sausage she knew she would get ) but maybe next year, its tourist season now luckily so I don’t go down there now until October.

I have been keeping myself busy though and this week seeing as we have had nice weather I’ve been doing my garden. The front l lawn is mowed and I’ve removed all the celandines that are now finished flowering. I don’t pull the roots out just the top growth because I like them. I’m going out tomorrow to see if the  Range have any decent shrubs that I can plant on the bank where the grass doesn’t grow. The back garden is in the middle of being tidied and I’ve chopped back lots of the hedging which had got straggly. I’ve left one bush because it’s got flowers on it which the bees like but once they have gone I will chop that back as well.

House wise not a lot has happened but I do have a builder coming to look at my kitchen floor for me on Monday so once that has been done I can put some new flooring down. I’m planning on finishing my bedroom if it rains next week then I can sort a new carpet and build my chest of drawers.

Work has been ok and I’m still loving my new work life balance. I was supposed to be working tomorrow but there were lots of us there so I asked for annual leave so I now have the day off. If it’s as hot as they say I’m going to strip the covers off my settee and get them washed so they can dry on the line 

Cherryfudge

I can only imagine how it feels to be adjusting to not having B's company, but I really like that you've decided she must be somewhere. 

jwil

I was the same with the cat, it's so weird when they are not there any more.  I still step around the top of the stairs in case she's there waiting to trip us up!  It takes a while to break those habits.

Hope you enjoy the sunny day today.