Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

daisy_1571

Post hasn't posted so this might appear twice 

this was here when we moved in.   Is this what you are thinking of doing?  It probably wouldn't have been my first choice but I like it now

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks for that Daisy, the beam is very similar! But it's going over the range cooker and I just think it will be too high up and look silly. Over a fireplace where the opening is lower anyway i think it looks fine. It's a problem for another day though I think.

I am feeling all of a sudden very stressed and irritated. I have had a phone call with the friend I helped get the job in college with me, and she's struggling to answer any of the questions on the initial forms. TBF to her I don't recall doing this until I was in on my first week and I spend 2 weeks in the office doing it all and had people around me to ask if I didn't know. So I have helped as best as I can but I can't do much more. She was super stressed and upset though. 

DS2 is also messaging me from his bedroom asking if I would like to go out today. I feel uber stressed by this too. I know I shouldn't he is my son, but I feel like everything I do and say is being reported back to exidiot and I find it really stressful and upsetting and feel like it is some sort of interrogation. I have said yes though, obviously otherwise that would be reported back that I didn't want to. He wants to go for a walk somewhere and I have found that for the last 6 months he lived here every time I tried to be jolly and make conversation he would slam me down with rude answers or one word replies meaning I carried on talking through awkward pauses and he would say I was too much and stressful to him and I just feel stressed now. I appreciate he is trying to mend the relationship but I feel it is coerced from idiot so that he can once again be the hero and say oh look at me I saved your relationship. My tum is in knots. I guess at least it is free or cheap if we stop at the coffee shop. 

I have put a wash on so at least I have achieved something today. I also have brought all the ironing down- not done it but the intention is there. I have also picked up a few things for the bin along the way down. DP did the washing up. I will go shopping and get that out the way too and then do a few jobs around taking DS out. I doubt that will last long anyway as my knee is too sore to walk too far and we don't have anything to talk about because he cuts me off and thinks I am interrogating him. Sighhhhhhhhhhhh ughhhhh.

beanielou

Not a nice way to live. I feel for you. 

debtfreewannabe321

I'm back! We didn't go for the planned walk. My leg is in absolute agony when I walk. I took DS to c/sta instead and paid for lunch. I let him take lead on conversation. Everything is so stilted it is like being on a really bad date with someone you desperately want your friend to save you from with a phone call and faked emergency 🤣🫣. In the end I said shall we go shopping? So we went and got the food shop. I'm hopeful that what I bought will last a week as I'm due a veg box as well on Saturday/ Sunday. I spent £70 and around 8 pound of that was on a veg and fruit slicer (don't judge I know I fell for the middle aisle again). With the veg box too it's still under £90 I think so doing ok so far if it lasts. DS was more relaxed around the supermarket and we chatted as we walked (I hobbled).

Back home and was going to do a tip run but it's shut. Whenever I fancy a takeaway away or doing a tip run I ultimately always want to do either on the day they're shut 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️. I remembered before loading the car up this time though.
Will hang a wash out in a mo, it's cloudy but I think it will dry. And then maybe do the ironing and prep for dinner (fajitas). 

daisy_1571

Glad your time spent with son went as ok as spending time with a teenager can lol.   I wouldn't worry about whether it was exidiots idea or not, fact is your son approached you to ask you to do something with him.  Thats all your son's actual doing - nobody can make a teenager do something they don't want to lol.  

Whenever you start thinking exidiot is pulling strings get into the habit of diverting your thoughts cos you can't possibly know what someone else is thinking plus who cares what he's thinking?   I bet he thinks about all the things you think he's thinking about a lot less than you think he's thinking about them 🤔 😆 🤣 😂 

Enjoy the fact you got a little glimpse of a more grown up ds for a few moments today, take it as its hard to get spontaneous affection from a teenage boy.  Enjoy it in your head when tomorrow he's back grumpiness over some teenage drama and then send him on his way back telling him you look forward to seeing him again and tell him that he should make the arrangements next time.  Ie less interaction with exidiot,  you just talk to son about when he's coming and when he's going.

Dxx

debtfreewannabe321

🤣🤣🤣 I had to re read that twice @daisy_1571
But you're right. 

DP is stressed with work. I was stressed because of pain and DS and I literally walked away when he was having a moan 🫣 I had reached full mental load. Oops. 

I am going to go outside for a bit and clear the carport. DS started it however there were spiders everywhere and we couldn't find a dustpan and brush. We can't find most things these days. I've found a garden one though so I will dust it all down. He's going to decide what he wants to keep and what he wants to get rid of ...there are martial arts things out there four sizes too small (like those legs covering things to stop bruises dunno what they're called damned menopause has stolen my vocab lately?!)

We've bags of rubble out there too and broken down kitchen units. It might be time to relent and order another skip soon.

I've paid off one k1arna thing as I've two on a pay over three months thing. Ex has paid for my new beam 😁. The other one will come out of the bills account where there's money waiting anyway so doesn't impact the budget. 

Right off to tackle spiders (I have arachnophobia pretty bad if you hear screaming it is me ...)

slm6002

Perhaps DS has an inkling that the grass isn't greener with Exidiot.  He might be trying to suss out if he has the nerve to bring it up about moving back.  He does sound like he has been a little better and trying to interact a bit more

debtfreewannabe321

slm6002 said:

Perhaps DS has an inkling that the grass isn't greener with Exidiot.  He might be trying to suss out if he has the nerve to bring it up about moving back.  He does sound like he has been a little better and trying to interact a bit more

I've already brought it up several hundred times 🤣🤣🤣 (okay maybe slightly exaggerated) however even if did want to stay me and DP were saying how stubborn he is he will cut his nose off to spite his face and stick with his choice. 

debtfreewannabe321

AHH I'm devastated (okay maybe another slight exaggeration) my l1dl middle aisle slicer thing is all cracked! After one use!! I'm going to take it back and try one more. I used it to make salsa last night and it worked really well so I will try another one if they will swap it over (surely they will I think the crack was there before I used it but it got worse with the slicing).

I slept slightly better last night but I have huge big bags under my eyes from a week of bad sleep and odd dreams (so no good deep sleep). I've dropped DD off to work already and up and showered. 
Plasterer is in. The guys from the office are due too today as they want to check progress. Electrician not here ...and that's the one we want so cooker can be plugged in and we can quit using the old one. Ah well. 

It's raining cats and dogs. Not literally but you know... So no gardening for me. Knee is still sore anyway so I'm tempted to have a lazy day. But, well, you know me and lazy days. I don't know how to do them properly 🤣. 

I have a glut of gherkins and I've bought vinegar and some other bits to make a pickle mix. I need to find the jars now and give them a good wash and sterilise. I'm hoping to do this today before the gherkins get too old. 

I paid £5.50 from v1nted sales across to the EF.
The bills are all trickling out nicely.
I paid off the electric and gas bill last month for the bill the very next day to say £167 instead of the zero I was expecting. Was fuming with that and thought !!!!!! you. So left it. I've been harassed all month for the money to pay it. I had put aside £155 for the bill this month and there isn't much wriggle room for anything else. At the moment. So I've paid that across and owe about £12 and I've already had emails asking for payment. They can wait. Absolutely fuming with that. The standing charges are so high our usage was around £54. 😒😒😒. 

I'm waiting to see how much is left in my AC after bills go out to see what to do with the maintenance money. I got £230 but used £80 to pay for the beam. And so have £150 supposedly but I think it will be swallowed up on other things so haven't earmarked it for anything else (like outstanding power bills 😐). 

debtfreewannabe321

Okay I've swapped the slicer for a new one. 
I also popped to Mr T for some GF stuff and picked up some stationery too. I also booked an eye test whilst out too. 

I'm sat down with the Tele on. As I was walking around my knee kept dislocating. It's very painful 😬 I have a knee support thing on I found but it's still sore to walk. So intend to rest it as much as possible today. Will catch up on here and watch a TV programme I think 🙂.