Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

debtfreewannabe321

The house is still clean and tidy as electrician never turned up ..I don't even care today even though we are on the final stretch- oh update he is coming Wednesday.

I got up and took DD to work, she was in a slightly better mood this morning (thank goodness!)

I came home and emptied the whole fridge out. The fridge at the mo is stood on dirty 40 year old hard board that was under the floor we stripped up. And it's really cold and dirty in that corner and I confess to having thrown food in after food for a couple of weeks now until just recently it has been falling out every time I open the fridge door. So I emptied it out carefully so as not to drop any and contaminate it on the dirty floor (it really is gross) and tidied it all up after scrubbing everything clean. Put the veg on one shelf, fruit and salad on another, the salad drawer is filled with onions and potatoes and the rest of the stuff is evenly spread on the other shelves (dips and yoghurts and tofu etc). I thought I would have a glut of food in there that needs throwing out, turned out it was just badly stacked and that is why it was all falling out. I only had to throw away two things too which I thought was a win as I thought most of it would be off after having neglected it so long.
So today I think we will have stuffed peppers as I have enough for three of us and peppers are a bit squishy. I also have leftover rice so that will be easy and quick to prep. I have a tonne of cucumber so will make a salad too. We all enjoyed the cucumber/onion/tomato mix with a bit of Himalayan salt and lemon juice the other day so might make that again. I will do courgettes dry fried on the side for DP and myself.

I have too many courgettes I may see if some friends want some. I also have far too many cucumbers and apples so I am thinking a smoothie/juice might be nice as well as lots of salad. The gherkins have been washed and sliced (big ones, small ones I left as they are) and salted. I will try and pickle them later. I seem to have issues pickling things though they spoil quickly even when I follow instructions on sterilising jars and whatever....I will try again though. 

Need to pop to Dr, need to also put bin out and make the dinner later but not much else to do today. Neck is feeling slightly better, knee is easing off well but I think it needs another day's rest. I really want to get fit but atm I can't even walk properly without pain so I am not wasting money on a gym membership yet. 

This week I have planned to meet two friends which will be nice, haven't got a lot of money though to be honest and we are only on the 4th August 😬. I keep opening up surveys and then leaving them. Seem to have lost my way with them to be honest and I get bored so quickly with them so haven't withdrawn any survey money for ages. I should make an effort but I find them soul sucking and just can't bring myself to do them atm......but.....no money really so I should.
I am feeling a little down if truth be told and don't know how to shake it off. I think it is a culmination of dust (seriously), DS2 leaving, no routine, no holiday, not much money to do anything, and aches and pains from nowhere. I can't tidy the house properly, nothing has a home downstairs, it's all displaced. SO appreciate DP efforts though, it is calmer this morning. DS, well, I think that is obvious and can't really do anything about it aside from just go with it. No summer holiday- not even had a day out to the beach in years. Feel sad about this one. Fed up of working, existing and no fun stuff. No money- I have listed lots on fb and v1nted though, just need a few bites on it. No routine........I am struggling with this one as I feel I have no time for myself in the morning (sorting out the house or dd or builders teas) and I feel like I should just get up and get on but I don't. I go into freeze mode when my MH slips. Aches and pains, meh, I don't like getting older. I have ordered more supplements. I don't want to be like mum and nan who both had osteoarthritis and other things wrong with them by the time they were 50...

Right I will be off, I will find something to do. It is raining heavy so no gardening just yet. Maybe that ironing pile..........

daisy_1571

Sorry you are feeling a bit down. Its draining having builders in, even though end result will be worth it its really hard having loads or rooms turned upside down and stuff everywhere.   Even making a cup of tea turns into a project by the time you find everything, clean dust and grit off everything and often have to make half a dozen as the builders appear by that point.

I cant work out if it was better doing this over your summer break when you are around to oversee things and make decisions on the spot, or if it would be better to have been going out to work every day and leaving them to it.  Most people get a break at work, but I dont think you would have so maybe in retrospect its better you haven't been at work?

Sadly tho, your break is rapidly going in.  I hope you can get a week or so after the builders go and before you are due back and if you do i think you should pretend you are away on holiday and go out every day somewhere, go to the beach and have a cone or fish n chips, go to a museum and have a lovelywandervthen cuppa and slice if cake, just have a few days completely not dealing with the house.  Let dd make her own her own way to work - if uve got a job you're adult enough to find your own way even if it takes longer on a bus or two - and go out you and dp for some relaxing fun adult days.  

Dxx

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks @daisy_1571 you're so right it does turn into an epic feat just making a drink sometimes. Never mind the clear up of builders mess before I can cook dinner- hence why I am glad they're not in until Weds. 
I haven't done any ironing, but that is because I realised the washing basket was full so I am washing drying that lot before just doing it all at once. 

DP has a week booked off but it is around the kitchen turning up and being fitted 😬 I think basically next year we I  just need to say no.... like I did at the beginning of this year to DIY 😏🙈 but like really mean it next year. And maybe then we can have a holiday instead of days off to buy kitchens and look at plaster in diy shops (oh yeh we have done that). Having a week to do stuff for myself sounds good I will have to think of a few days out that are free or cheap to keep costs down a bit and do this. I have probably £150 left to last the month (not including food that is separate).

Also I had the same convo with DP- I wish they had done the work when I was at work because I would have been out the house, yes it would still be messy and dirty but I would have work to take my mind off it. Instead i have two months off, the first bit where I could have gardened I couldn't because materials literally were in my way, and when they used those up (put the walls and roof up) it started raining. I know it will get better, I know it will be lovely when done, I am already feeling slightly better for just having a moan  

Watty1

Having any kind of work done on the house is tough.   And fragile mental health makes it harder, especially if we add the stress of DS and ex twit and all that on top.   

I absolutely love @daisy_1571 idea of pretending to be away. I'm going to add that one into my ideas list.

earthgirl2

Sorry to hear you are feeling a bit down, such huge areas impacted by the building work, as well as the other things and pain too, it's understandable that that will be taking a toll. Look after yourself and hopefully there's light at the end of the tunnel soon x

beanielou

A week of wee treats sound good & not too expensive too 🤗

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks for the love everyone @Watty1 @earthgirl2 @beanielou and of course @daisy_1571 for the good idea. I am going to have a look to see what's on locally and what's free. Will make it as mse as possible 😁. Love how people on here are so helpful and kind 🥰.

I've spent nearly all day doing what some of you mse'rs refer to as frogs I think (I hope I'm reading it right in all your diaries anyway 🤣) and I have filled out huge amounts of paperwork for the fostering. Basically I realised that i am a bit of a gypsy who cannot hold down a job for long and could write a book on significant events that have happened in my lifetime so far (I'm probably about half way through so let's hope it slows down now eh). I had 20+ addresses and jobs were similar 😬. I am impressed with my recollection tbh though. DP is doing his now. This is the sort of job I personally will put off for months 😬
And we have medicals all booked in for two weeks time. 

Fostering is plan B.
I said to DP I feel I need a plan C and D though. Plan A is obviously status quo as is. Depending on my September timetable it may not be that awful. Still given the choice I would not go out to work if I had to (would any of us?)

Meeting up with my friend who put me up to this application on weds as she works in the industry and has been banging on about how good I'd be considering my 'significant life experiences' ...I'll be telling her off for not forewarning about exactly how in-depth this goes 🤣 I thought the enhanced DBS was bad enough.

Stuffed peppers were good and used up peppers on their last edible day I think (I did my nans thing of cutting the bad bit off and still eating it). Tomorrow I will see what needs eating and make a meal from that too. Determined not to let any of the fresh stuff go to waste this week as I have a lot in.

Oooo it was a NSd too!

And my MOP came off the mortgage sits at 164,306 😬 eek. Seems so high to me. Need a plan to get this down and not cancel my DD for the monthly OP. 

skint_spice

Well done with getting on with the paperwork, I am not sure how fostering works money wise but would they pay your NI?

debtfreewannabe321

skint_spice said:

Well done with getting on with the paperwork, I am not sure how fostering works money wise but would they pay your NI?

I think it's going back to self employment again like I was before a task I dread 😬 however I kind of had a plan C after speaking to my friend of keeping the day job if it's not too awful and just doing respite care so the NI is done through PAYE wages and the fostering is just a tax return like I did for all the years previously (would absolutely pay someone to do it this time round if we do end up doing it the stress this used to cause me was incredible 🤣). 

skint_spice

Quite right DFW, I am sure there is enough stress in your life!