Buying a little piece of Middle England; Manifesting my way to mortgage free.

daisy_1571

Kitchen looking great, well done.

Well done dd passing.   Good she's recognised she needs some down time

Glad you're taking a bit peaceful time too

Dx  

pennywisepoundstupid

Huge well done to your DD passing her test. Not really sure what to say about DS and your ex but i'm sending you a big hug.
Your kitchen is going to look fantastic when it is finished and so worth the mayhem xx

Watty1

Ex and DS a bit beyond me but sounds like they were trying to make a statement in their own ways.  Great job DD knowing she needed down time.

Kitchen looking great. In awe of your skills there!

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks @daisy_1571, @Watty1, @pennywisepoundstupid
DD came home from drinks out rather upset and went up to her room. It took me twenty minutes to get her out and tell me what had happened. The new GF was in the car when she went out so they went off to the coffee shop and ordered some drinks, DD got some chips too. Then Ex and DS decided to go on about DD and her weight and how fat she used to be (she was a size 8 - she has since starved herself into a size 6 because of them). I am livid. I haven't said anything to ex. Not sure how to say this but DD was really upset. She was the only one who ordered and instead of focusing on nice stufff- like well done DD you have a job! You passed your test! Well done DS you got into a new school! etc etc etc it was all sarcastic put downs which is Exidiots script. It's how he subtly abused and gaslighted me for 2 decades and I could never call him out on it because- " oh you're so sensitive I was just having a laugh", "god don't you know how to take a joke" etc etc. he did the same with DD yesterday and worse still DS joined in with him and apparently they all sat there staring at DD whilst she had the small bowl of chips and made her feel really awkward. She asked to come home after that. I need to speak to DS too about this. It's not okay. It is how eating disorders are borne. 
It is DS birthday today though...........so need to decide when to do this, today may not be the right time. 
DD is off to work, and I will just do a few jobs before I collect her and we have a meal planned for later too. Not much else is planned though so if the opportunity does arise I will speak to DS, birthday or not. 

KajiKita

Oh no, poor DD. 

Please give her snug from me and tell her she’s gorgeous, I can see from over here! 😉

KK

beanielou

What a horrid thing to say & do. 

Watty1

Deep sigh. Poor DD.   Ex will always be a (insert whatever word) but DS is still young enough to earn he does not need to have ex as a role model and that women need support and encouragement not putting down.

debtfreewannabe321

She had a beautiful curvy size 8 figure before starving herself @KajiKita same as mine used to be and ex used to always make comments about me too. I could unalive him right now this has triggered me so much. 😡 DD is a waif right now. 
Totally agree @beanielou and I agree @Watty1 I need to word in such a way DS will actually listen to me. He seems to shut his ears to everything these days. Absolutely fuming. 😤

daisy_1571

Firstly,  breathe.

Today is ds birthday so probably best make it about him and not have a go today.   This has been a problem with exidiot for about 30 years so you don't need to fix it today.

Give dd plenty reassurance.

Be ready if it looks like any repeat of the behaviour starts in your presence to shut it down but otherwise let it go today.

Tomorrow and ongoing is plenty time to properly address the issues. 


Dxx

debtfreewannabe321

I've been to Mr W to get DS a cake (he likes the fresh ones so couldn't get It yesterday) and some reduced croissants. Also bought a few plants reduced from £12.99 to £2.99. 
I've come home had a cuppa and am much calmer now. I've decided today is for DS as you say daisy and will battle the bullies tomorrow. My issue is not really with DS anyway he is just parroting dad and his behaviours. 
DD has gone off to work. And the table for the restaurant is at 6 so gives DP and DD time to get home and changed and chill for a bit before we leave. 
It's brightening up outside so might go and plant the salvias I just bought if it's not too wet. It looks like it's rained quite a bit overnight. 
No builders all week so it is nice and quiet.