big debt owed to me from friend

Doodles

How much was it?  was there any written agreement? What was the understanding of how much he should pay you and when?

MEM62

silvercar said:

Does your friend own property? If so ask for a charging order over the property. That way you know that eventually you will get your money.

Based on what?  You can't just obtain a charging order.  You need a court judgement first and the OP has not given the slightest indication that they have any case that would convince a court to grant one.  It is unlikely that the OP will see their money back.     

Pollycat

A lot of these questions were asked and some were answered in the OP's other thread.
This thread is just more of the same.

elsien

The previous thread was back in April when the OP stated that they had run out of patience with the friend.
 It’s now eight months later with exactly the same question being asked.
OP what is changed since then and what have you done to address the situation? To save us all just repeating the same advice that you were given before. 

And for what it’s worth you were also saying that the friend is on an IVA and has no money. You can’t get money back from someone who doesn’t have any.

tiger135

he doesnt have any himself but his dad does and owns the house his son lives in outright worth 350k. 
thats why i know there is money there.
ive given it a few months as ive had dribs and drabs back but overall its a drop in the ocean. 

Pollycat

tiger135 said:

he doesnt have any himself but his dad does and owns the house his son lives in outright worth 350k. 
thats why i know there is money there.

But it's not the father who owes you money. Is it?
As for the money coming from an inheritance, what is the Father's health like?
Are you willing to wait for 10 years? 20 years? for repayment of this loan?

If - as you say in your first post on this thread - he treats his parents badly, maybe they'll leave their money and property to a cat charity...

If - as you said in your other thread - the person who owes you money has an IVA and his parents are obviously not willing to help him financially, can you really rely on this inheritance?
Your friend's Father has ploughed in over £500k to his son already.
I'm pretty sure that when his parents die, he'll pocket his inheritance and disappear from your life.

You've thrown good money after bad over a 10 yer period.

We seem to be going round in circles here.
As elsien said:

elsien said:

The previous thread was back in April when the OP stated that they had run out of patience with the friend.
 It’s now eight months later with exactly the same question being asked.
OP what is changed since then and what have you done to address the situation? To save us all just repeating the same advice that you were given before. 

And for what it’s worth you were also saying that the friend is on an IVA and has no money. You can’t get money back from someone who doesn’t have any.

tiger135 said:

ive given it a few months as ive had dribs and drabs back but overall its a drop in the ocean. 

You haven't given it 'a few months'.
The loan has been outstanding for 10 years (from your earlier thread).
You were saying exactly the same thing 8 months ago.

What exactly are you looking for from posters here on MSE?

tiger135

well its difficult when you have known someone from an early age  , for the friendship to turn to anger and frustration. 
hes made me look like a mug.
hes let me down.
hes lied.

Pollycat

tiger135 said:

well its difficult when you have known someone from an early age  , for the friendship to turn to anger and frustration. 
hes made me look like a mug.
hes let me down.
hes lied.

I think we all understand that.
But you've facilitated that by making excuses for him over a long time.

So what are you going to do about it?

Pollycat said:

What exactly are you looking for from posters here on MSE?

We can't just wave a magic wand and recover the money you've lent him.
You should decide whether to hang on hoping he'll pay back the money or write off the loan and cut him out of your life.

Sea_Shell

Write off the money.   Block him.  Move on.

Anything else is flogging a dead horse IMO.

tiger135

Thanks for the opinions.  A big thing Ive learned is "actions speak louder than words"