Bold leap into retirement

kempiejon

I've never felt work to be sufficiently defining of my personality that I committed to it like others writing here. I went to work to accumulate the money to do as I wished in my free time. I gave up full time employment for about a year most decades while a wage slave. In my 20s I realised i wanted to be free of the daily grind early, Being lucky and smart with my money I'd won by 52 making work optional. Work was never that relevant but I feel that's an unusual view.

BridgetTheCat

welp, I’ve just completed my first 3-day working week. It did feel weird to sign off for the weekend on a Thursday evening but I’m sure I’ll get over it 🤣

MayDogsandCoffee

@BridgetTheCat I have been on leave, I think Monday afternoon is going to be booked out for me to complete application to go down to 3 days. (Might be Monday morning when I open my email in-box).

BridgetTheCat

First day of the first long weekend of my semi-retirement, and my mum sends me a “if you’re looking for something to do” list 🙄🤣

So yes, one of the reasons for reducing hours was to have more time to help mum & dad out, but still… Thing is, I can remember my gran doing the same to her.

Smudgeismydog

Since my partner and I retired we have spent more time with all our parents, helping them with jobs around the house, and also enjoying regular day trips.
If I’m honest, we are continuing to work on the right balance for them and us, but I am also grateful to have the time to be with them.

eastcorkram

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81957897#Comment_81957897

Strange to think of that. Something I'd not given much thought to. In our case, all four parents were gone long before we retired. One on each side gone about 30 years before we stopped working, and the other two about 10 years before.

MallyGirl

in my case we still have 5 of the 6 (one side divorced young and both remarried) and only lost the other last year. My mum has Alzheimer's and is being cared for at home by her older husband - there have been a few dashes down to the West Country to sort things as he isn't coping that well. In laws are still doing pretty well with him still riding his vintage motorbikes round the Pennines in his late 80s. It's a 3+ hour drive to one side, as Dad ended up living not that far from Mum in the end, and closer to 5 to the others. I can't help with day to day things unless it is over the phone but can go there for bigger stuff as long as OH can wfh with the dog

Roger175

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81958193#Comment_81958193

Amongst our pier group, looking after elderly parents is a big thing and I know loads of people for whom this has a huge affect on their daily routine. We are both 62 and still have my Mother & Stepfather and my wife's Mother still with us. All just about still living at home but in constant need of help.

If I'm totally honest it's a right pain in the ar*e, but clearly we have a duty to help and we do what we can, in fact we go above and beyond, but I won't pretend it hasn't been an issue and has somewhat disrupted many of our early retirement dreams.

We also spend a lot of time helping our kids out (which we do willingly and with total enjoyment). I was told the other days that we are known as the 'Sandwich' generation.

Smudgeismydog

I’ve heard the phrase ‘sandwich generation’ as well, and figured that’s the stage we are at. Both my partner and I have two siblings each, but helping out with his mum (84) and my mum (79) is now falling predominantly to us.

This is due to family relations on his side, and geographical distance on mine, and it’s probably no coincidence that these responsibilities have increased since we took early retirement, even though my kids (18 and 20), are the youngest grandchildren on both sides, and still needing support.

I also make a very concerted effort to see my late husband’s parents as often as we can, and to keep them included in the kid’s lives. My two are the only grandchildren they have, so that’s really important. Whilst they live a couple of hours away, we visit frequently, and they come up to stay for holidays, birthdays etc.

In some ways being more present and having more time to be around everyone was a factor in taking early retirement, as I was feeling very squeezed trying to fit everything in whilst I was working. However, I am also conscious of ensuring my partner and I balance having time for our adventures, with our caring responsibilities, as I know our respective mum’s needs are only going to increase over time (they both have mobility issues already).

Sarahspangles

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/81958193#Comment_81958193

My partner’s mum lived for less than six months after he retired, and I lost my dad about 18 months before I retired. My partner was born when his mum was 24 and she died at 85, which is ‘a good age’, so I think people either have to have ‘young’ parents or retire in their 50s to have overlapping retirements. I have an older brother who retired before my dad died (also at 85) but the pandemic meant that more fell on me simply because I was nearby, which worked for bubble arrangements (and doesn’t ‘bubbling’ feel like a long time ago!)

Couples are starting families even later nowadays, which is possibly going to make overlapping retirements less common in future.