From Frugal Foundations to Fortified Family Future

Greying_Pilgrim · 31 October at 7:38PM

LotsofTea - that sounds like a brilliant time. We took the decision this morning to forgo our intended stay at a purpley hotel after a visit to (another) museum. DH had said he was 'OK' with the extra day, but it wasn't as straightforward as I thought to get to (well, the satnav didn't seem to want to play ball 🫤) and I decided that I would take the time we still had access to good wi-fi to cancel the hotel, rather than pour over atlases, globes and OS mapifications to get us to B, from A. As per usual, having made the decision, DH says he's glad we've returned home........ The journey was OK. Much like any other holiday makers, we've spent time on a motorway 'carpark' 🙄 But we're home safe and sound now. We had a picnic lunch at services along the way, and stopped at MrL to get milk when we got home to Greying Town.

We've literally just finished the tea that I'd prepped last night for our hotel stay tonight. The improvement was that I was able to microwave the sausage pasta - it was good, but definitely better for being warmed up. The pizza was the second one out of the box of 2 frozen 'simply' cheese and tomato pizzas from MrL. I'd added extra cheese. Not brilliant, but better than nowt.

It wasn't about the money, but coming home a day early has saved us £100 - that can't be denied. And interestingly, LG was far more 'easily entertained' than I gave them credit for (although there is a certain programme on...... beebeecee eye-player - I think - that if I never see another episode of...... ever..... then I'll be a happy bunny 🙄) I think if i was doing this break with a 'degree in hindsight' we probably could have done less museum/attractions, and more just hanging. Of our 6 days away - today was lost to travel ☹️, but we did 3 days "organised" and 2 days "less organised", And the less organised were "as good" as the "money invested in attractions" days. Yesterday in particular was one of those days that by "just being in the right place at the time" we saw so much, and a couple of friendly locals giving an informative commentary, made things even better. No money could have bought that experience.

We've been lucky with the weather, and no day was as rainy as forecast, and we weren't prevented from doing anything. We saw many, many rainbows today, and only got caught in one downpour, which was short-lived (thankfully).

I must admit, I'm bushed. The past week has been great, but alot of organising and prep of meals etc etc, It was lovely to be elsewhere, but perhaps I need to rein in my propensity to "do all the things whilst we're here, as we might not be here again" and just enjoy family time, wherever we're at, and whatever we're doing. I have to say though, I honestly don't think we could do as much as we do achieve, if we didn't self-cater/take picnics.

Ta for popping in, and for wishing Fam. Greying well on our little vacances. It's super appreciated.

Greying X

Greying_Pilgrim · 1 November at 8:42AM

Good Morning MFW'rs

Washing machine is on 🤣 We had to take our own bedding and towels to the accommodation, so they're first to get laundered.

LG has already asked "what are we doing today, Mum?" 🤣 I think it will be a day of catching up - on life admin as much as anything. DH has the cc bill to pay, the plumber has been in touch re the boiler service and we need to finalise an installation date for the DG.

Thinking about our hols, the day that was hooked around an EH visit was great, there was so much of it that we couldn't have scripted - and was just down to being in the right place. But memories were made - if only my memory of paying over £3 for parking - for one-hour! - at a touristy scenic spot, later in the day 😱 Penalty of 'summer pricing' lasting until the 1st Nov. Had we been there today, it would have been less than half of that - and we probably would have stayed a little longer, and maybe spent some money in the cafe/gift shop. As it was, the car park monster got our money - Dear venue operators, you can only have our money once........ Still, I bet the car park operators are different to the cafe operators, and don't give a fig for their livelihood.

The three "big" museums we went to were all quite expensive, but all did re-entry for 1 year. Not something that usually attracts me - but there was no "one visit" pricing available. But interestingly, the most expensive museum was also the least engaging. Whilst we could go back there within the year, we probably won't. Whereas the 'cheapest' of the big 3, was interesting - and there were several bits that we missed to see (it was a massive site and very, very busy) - so I will try to work out how we could get back there, before the year is out. It was definitely value for money. I booked online with the 'big 3', and there was a small discount for doing so, however, it cost £147 to visit all three museums. The accommodation was good, and had most of everything you could need, alongside a lovely view. I would definitely go there again. With fuel for the car, spending money and groceries, we have spent something like £600. Let's face it, that's alot of money - but I don't know how we could go on holiday at all if we didn't self-cater all meals. I was a little disappointed to not find some local food products (not meat and that would last to bring home) - when we went to the market town, a couple of the shops I have used before had closed. So our local produce was limited to a couple of alcoholic beverages. I had the idea of having a 'chippy tea' the one night, but I was doing some research with a chippy menu and LG was just so negative about it (without having a proper look 🙄) that I gave up. I think we had wedges and a MrL pizza that night for tea.

Both LG and DH can sometimes be overly negative about things, without truly looking into them or thinking them through. I would have liked one night off cooking, but they didn't see it like that (we've had a similar situations on previous holidays). It isn't just me that they are like that with. We met a chum last week, and they kindly offered to treat us to lunch. I was trying to get LG to actually read the menu (they'd glanced and said "there's nothing i like to eat on there") - and chum assumed I was tutoring LG to go for the 'cheapest' item - so they interrupted my explanation and took LG off. I realise they wanted to treat LG and it wasn't about the cost (which is incredibly generous of them), but luckily, I had been able to point out to LG that there was a yummy sandwich filling, that they could have as a panini option. They went for that, and ate every.single.scrap - which, is, the best response to someone's generosity, I think. As it was, our chum got to scratch their indulgence itch by buying LG the most yummy, scrummy milkshake - which again, was finished up with nothing left 😁

Perhaps planning and preparation has a negative side - DH and LG always expect me to come up with meals/visits or whatever. Perhaps I need to go on strike a bit more, and leave them to fend for themselves. They'd cope (of course they would), but I think it wouldn't really be the cheapest/efficient option...... 😁 I gave LG some money to take on holiday - it was alot of money to them (£20), and said they could spend it how they wanted - but once it was gone, it was gone. It did make them a bit more thoughtful about what they bought. It's unfortunate that the one thing they bought does seem to not work. We'll double check it, and if we can't blame operator error, then we'll be writing to the manufacturer, as it wasn't cheap - and the manufacturer is a well established brand - and their goods should "do what it says on the box".

Blow, it's started raining. I was hoping we'd dodge the showers today. I wanted to avoid in/out/in/out with the washing...... I may have a trip to the launderette in my future, as I can't have all these linens draped around the house.

Ta for popping by. Its appreciated.

Greying X

kayannie · 1 November at 10:56AM

Welcome back! It sounds as if you've had an enjoyable but exhausting holiday, There always seems so much catching up do when you get home, washing, admin etc The cost of the museums seems extortionate!
I know how you feel about being expected to be cooking every day, as well as all the other 'stuff' we do. Perhaps going on strike is a good idea, except that I'd probably end up preparing 'ready meals' before I down tooled!
KA x

Greying_Pilgrim · 1 November at 12:09PM

kayannie - museums and attractions in general seem really expensive now. DH and I had been to one of the 'big' museums before - probably 15 or so years ago?? I seem to remember it being costly then, but we hadn't been, so thought it worthwhile. The issue being, the museum hasn't really changed/developed in the interim, and what should have been interesting (for DH and LG), wasn't really. I'm not totally convinced, even if we lived nearby-ish, that we would be frequent visitors. I have to say though, at all 3 museums (and the EH property), the staff - whether they were paid or volunteers, were absolutely superb, and all wanted their visitors to see everything, and get photo opportunities and get the most out of the visit. That was one common denominator which I am pleased to record.

Thinking about it, 'ready meals' would have been a good option as a treat - good suggestion kayannie 😁 To make the most of them, I would have had to have mastered the gas oven. That really did confuse me - think that particular stove cooked cool - and I ended up undercooking one pizza, and overcooking/not-quite-burning the second one, well half of it anyway. But now I know what I'm looking at improving (I had initially assumed the oven was electric), I can do better next time I use a gas oven. And whilst 'good quality' ready meals ain't cheap - they probably would work out cheaper than a take-away.

The installation date for the windows has been set.  tmv has made me think with reflections about her heat pump installation. Whilst we're dealing with a family run firm - the "surveyor" is not the installation crew, and whilst they've lived, breathed and worked the glazing industry for a goodly length of time, there is still the potential for miscommunication or one part of the work to be viewed differently by the surveyor and the folk who've actually got to do the installation. So I am taking a leaf out of tmv's book and thinking from the get-go about how I want things to look, at the end of the installation, and need to find my (firm but polite) customer voice during the works, to ensure that we're all singing from the same hymn sheet. On the plus side, we're not a TGIF, now let's p 'orf to the pub, appointment 😉

Urgh! My laundry gamble hasn't paid off. We've just had a sharp, heavy rain shower. Didn't last no more than 5 minutes, but I think it's undone the previous couple of hours drying work. Grrrr.

A school chum popped round earlier, and invited LG for a playdate, so that was nice, albeit unexpected.

Right, best go and whip up a vat of soup. It's cold today! Plus we had better start the month as we need to go on - belt-tightening, belt-tightening, and more belt-tightening...... Thank heavens for our space here with like-minded folk and for all your support and suggestions.

Greying X

ladybird1106 · 1 November at 2:42PM

I often found when we went away and had to self cater from a money perspective I didn’t actually feel like I was getting a holiday as I was still cooking. Now I freeze some prepared meals made by me and then when we go on holiday take them still frozen. They are bulked together to keep each other cold in cool box and are still frozen when we get to our destination. I usually take a couple of days worth. They are veggies meals.

Love 🐞

Greying_Pilgrim · 1 November at 4:07PM

ladybird1106 said:

I often found when we went away and had to self cater from a money perspective I didn’t actually feel like I was getting a holiday as I was still cooking. Now I freeze some prepared meals made by me and then when we go on holiday take them still frozen. They are bulked together to keep each other cold in cool box and are still frozen when we get to our destination. I usually take a couple of days worth. They are veggies meals.
Love 🐞

I think I will be minded to do more of ^ in the future hun, although the distance from home (and if we're going straight to our final destination) will come into play - as will time of year. The butter/spread, cheese and baps worked this time, but they weren't still frozen solid (but gave us 24hrs without having to find a supermarket - so a win in my book). I will admit that my cool bag isn't top-notch glacial grade, but then the branded cool box (that cost alot of money), that I had was no better. I also wasn't sure what size the fridge was at the accommodation. As it happens, the fridge was a good size, and the larder freezer was decent too. Another 💨bnb we stay at has a small fridge, with a teeny 'icebox' - all of which was quietly loosing the will to work, last time we stayed......

But the principle is sound, and having listened to advice on MSE, I shall definitely be looking to expand what I can do for future breaks. I didn't think it was too much to have one meal that was a takeaway/bought - clearly my fam. have different ideas! And for me, it wasn't so much the cooking, it was more a pain to have to know I had all the meal components all the time. But the fridge freezer did mean that I could buy boxed frozen pizza to last 2 meals, and veggie sausages to make 2 meals too. There was even a potato masher in the utensils drawer, so we were able to have sausage, mash & beans for tea 😁👍

Greying X

KajiKita · 1 November at 5:00PM

In terms of you getting a break, I think if you go away for 7 days say, then 2 of the days should be ‘handed over’ to Mr GP and LG for adventures and (cost controlled) food provision. The food and adventures could be on offset days. It’s an important life skill for LG to start learning from about now and doing it with Mr GP will always be something that will engage LG 😊

I did one load of washing this morning, before heading out the door for the day, thinking I might get it on the line, but it threw it down just as the load finished so the whole lot got chucked on (sorry, sorry … placed elegantly! 😂) the heated airer just as we ran out the door. I haven’t checked yet how it’s doing …

KK

Greying_Pilgrim · 1 November at 6:49PM

KajiKita - that's an option that is worth 'developing'. To be fair, DH did do the washing up (he always does), but I wonder whether "acceptable" options would be found on the takeaway menu if cooking responsibilities shifted to other Fam. members on vacation 🤔🤭 It needs working on now though, because currently, if DH and LG do any cooking (they have baked together before now), they end up squabbling as to what to do, and if I had a £ for every "but mum doesn't do it like that" I heard, I'd be a rich woman by now - able to go on hols in a full-board establishment 🤣 I totally agree on the life-skills acquisition though, and need to gird my loins and let them loose in the kitchen when it "doesn't matter", so that we can reap the benefits whilst away etc. I do have a small concern about tiny kitchen spaces, lack of workspace and different tools (gas ovens/microwaves etc), but those are just challenges - not deal breakers.

I got the washing in earlier than I'd hoped (just before 4pm), as the online forecast said rain would be starting in 10 minutes - it was pretty accurate too. I put the larger sheets/duvets on an airer in front of the dehu for a couple of hours and put the other smaller stuff, which was dry-ish onto the second airer. Stuff wasn't too bad - but there's no doubt that the sharp shower undid much of the early gains of the strong breeze ☹️

DH must be beginning to feel better. His focus has shifted now from being all consumed about illness to werriting about next months pay packet size, owing to the amount of sick leave. It is what it is. He couldn't have gone to work, and there's no point in trying to claim otherwise. It is also why we live like we do (now), having an emergency fund and living within our means - without being monastic or (hopefully) too boring. We've got cupboards full of food, we've got n*ctar points to use, as well as a coupons from insurance purchases for MrS, so my grocery expenditure this month can be small. And rightly or wrongly, Christmas isn't a huge deal for us - so expenditure needn't be OTT. But neither do we need to survive on water biscuits and fresh air. There is middle ground. It doesn't seem to matter how many times I explain this to DH, he still can't get over his hunter/gatherer role. He keeps on feeling he's let everyone down, which is not how LG or me see it at all.

We had oven chips, qu0rn nuggets and mushy peas for tea.

Can't think of anything else MSE to report, so I'll push off. Ta for popping in, I hope you know how appreciated your visits are.

Greying X

Greying_Pilgrim · 1 November at 8:04PM

Right, I've given it some thought, and decided on £209 for the grocery budget, made up of £150 cash and £59 in vouchers. I must admit, I'm starting to feel that n*ctar isn't doing much good at the mo. The price reductions are on things that I don't buy, or I bought one of something last week that lasts 6 months, and I'm offered it again this week...... 🙄 And then there are all the products that are offered at a lower price, but are never in stock......... 🙄

I'm going to keep the non-food at £50, and there is approx £35 left in the bulk fund.

Soup and pudding nights are going to return - I don't actually think there will be any complaints about this situation tbh 🤣 Thank heavens for autumnal weather...... except for rain on washdays - no thankies for that.....

We have plenty of some things, but we're low on veg (a poor state of affairs for a veggie household!).

Rising prices will be my enemy, but it's worth trying to keep to the budget - November is 30 days, we're through day 1 already and haven't gone without food. I haven't stuck "absolutely" to the budget for several months, but a) I've not been massively over, and b) the budgets have been small to start with. By at least trying, I've spent less than I would if I didn't set a low bar.

Worth a try anyway, and if DH sees a calm approach to grocery spending, he may calm down a bit himself. As has been said on other threads, stress is just so damaging to health.

Greying X