Splitting the bill

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  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,681 Forumite
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    I'm a pensioner and have never been to someone else's house for a takeaway and have never invited anyone to ours to have one.
  • maman
    maman Posts: 28,583 Forumite
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    I know young people who split the cost of a take away. Maybe it comes from living in student houses. 

    I also think it's become more common since Covid to save money on drinks for someone to host a group of friends by providing a venue, bring your own drinks and then buy in the food from deliveroo so that the host doesn't have to cook . 
  • sheramber
    sheramber Posts: 19,101 Forumite
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    DigSunPap said:
    DigSunPap said:
    Miser1964 said:
    If invited by friends for a meal, I'd have taken a gift/bottle of wine so would be mighty vexed if also asked to split the bill for a takeaway unless forewarned.

    I dont think bringing a bottle of wine excuses you from paying for your takeaway though. A bottle of wine can be as cheap as £5, depending on the price of your takeaway this could be a fraction of it - however it is a gesture that is usually appreciated by the host
    A takeaway can also be £5pp and a bottle of wine can be thousands which even in London I'd struggle to get a takeaway to get up to on a pp basis. 

    The main point is I am inviting you to my home for food then it seems unreasonable to then subsequently state that the food has to be paid for by the invitee. It'd be different if I invited you around for drinks and you yourself then suggest getting a takeaway or said my food was terrible and so you'll be buying a takeaway. 

    If I were looking for a contribution on a takeaway, say because it was from one of the Michelin starred places, then I'd be clear up front when inviting you that it'd be a split bill basis and probably would be less surprised if you didn't turn up with a couple of bottles. 
    I think it depends on the level of friendship you have with the person/group. I am only 24 and I feel as though it is expected that we would all split a takeaway if we ordered one. It would never be assumed that the host would pay. Perhaps that is just my age but I'd like to think I will be the same as I get older.
    That is fine if is an acceptable arrangement to both parties.

    But not if it wasn't previously arranged and you turned up and unexpectedly were told you had to pay  for your dinner.

    But then I would not invite someone for a meal and then give them a takeaway unless it was already arranged within the invitation.
     

  • DigSunPap
    DigSunPap Posts: 375 Forumite
    First Post Name Dropper
    sheramber said:
    DigSunPap said:
    DigSunPap said:
    Miser1964 said:
    If invited by friends for a meal, I'd have taken a gift/bottle of wine so would be mighty vexed if also asked to split the bill for a takeaway unless forewarned.

    I dont think bringing a bottle of wine excuses you from paying for your takeaway though. A bottle of wine can be as cheap as £5, depending on the price of your takeaway this could be a fraction of it - however it is a gesture that is usually appreciated by the host
    A takeaway can also be £5pp and a bottle of wine can be thousands which even in London I'd struggle to get a takeaway to get up to on a pp basis. 

    The main point is I am inviting you to my home for food then it seems unreasonable to then subsequently state that the food has to be paid for by the invitee. It'd be different if I invited you around for drinks and you yourself then suggest getting a takeaway or said my food was terrible and so you'll be buying a takeaway. 

    If I were looking for a contribution on a takeaway, say because it was from one of the Michelin starred places, then I'd be clear up front when inviting you that it'd be a split bill basis and probably would be less surprised if you didn't turn up with a couple of bottles. 
    I think it depends on the level of friendship you have with the person/group. I am only 24 and I feel as though it is expected that we would all split a takeaway if we ordered one. It would never be assumed that the host would pay. Perhaps that is just my age but I'd like to think I will be the same as I get older.
    That is fine if is an acceptable arrangement to both parties.

    But not if it wasn't previously arranged and you turned up and unexpectedly were told you had to pay  for your dinner.

    But then I would not invite someone for a meal and then give them a takeaway unless it was already arranged within the invitation.
     

    No of course if you go against what you said originally, then that is not on.
  • I don't understand why you would invite people over and order a takeaway (which to me is synonymous with rubbish). Much healthier and cheaper to self-cater, even if it comes from the supermarket chiller aisle. Your home, your rules and a person should feel sovereignty over their expenditure under their own roof. If your guests are gagging for a takeaway they can order it in their own home.

    @eri1964 - sounds like this older couple were enjoying the social power they wielded over you. Shame on them!

    The takeaway I use is run by a Michelin starred chef. It’s most Definitely not rubbish. 
    That I wager is a minority. And certainly not what JustEat and Deliveroo promote to its mainstream audience:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAcQDD2UBOg&ab_channel=JustEat
    I have never used JustEat Deliveroo or any other similar service although I don't think their marketing slogan is "Want to eat rubbish? Then order with us"

    Seems odd to think that all takeaway food is rubbish.  

    Things that are differerent: draw & drawer, brought & bought, loose & lose, dose & does, payed & paid


  • maman
    maman Posts: 28,583 Forumite
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    I think for most people who order take away food, it's just an alternative to what they might order in a restaurant. Covid lockdowns showed that this can be expanded way beyond the usual Chinese and Indian. 
  • DigSunPap
    DigSunPap Posts: 375 Forumite
    First Post Name Dropper
    I don't understand why you would invite people over and order a takeaway (which to me is synonymous with rubbish). Much healthier and cheaper to self-cater, even if it comes from the supermarket chiller aisle. Your home, your rules and a person should feel sovereignty over their expenditure under their own roof. If your guests are gagging for a takeaway they can order it in their own home.

    @eri1964 - sounds like this older couple were enjoying the social power they wielded over you. Shame on them!

    The takeaway I use is run by a Michelin starred chef. It’s most Definitely not rubbish. 
    That I wager is a minority. And certainly not what JustEat and Deliveroo promote to its mainstream audience:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAcQDD2UBOg&ab_channel=JustEat
    I have never used JustEat Deliveroo or any other similar service although I don't think their marketing slogan is "Want to eat rubbish? Then order with us"

    Seems odd to think that all takeaway food is rubbish.  

    Correct - there are plenty of healthy options on takeaway apps these days
  • sheilavw
    sheilavw Posts: 1,600 Forumite
    First Post First Anniversary
    I recall, although approximately  30 years ago there was one or two of us all pregnant at the same time and having leaving nights out (meals) from work. One lady had just come back off maternity and was invited. She declined because she had just returned to work after a long break and genuinely couldn't afford to go out. The meal was going to be at an Italian restaurant and at the time the cheapest meal was lasagne at something like £3.99.Everyone was begging her to come out, she said that she could just spare £5 so could afford it because she could have this and 1 coke to drink. It was attended by a big group. Several were ordering starters, mains, desserts and bottles of wine. When the bill arrived the people who had all this said "oh let's just all split the bill". Obviously she couldn't afford to do this and was made to feel really bad. I have never forgotten this. I think it is ok to split it, or pay just for what you have had but I think you need to decide at the beginning to avoid any awkwardness or embarrasment!
  • Pollycat said:
    I'm a pensioner and have never been to someone else's house for a takeaway and have never invited anyone to ours to have one.
    Nearly a pensioner here, and the same as above. Though it's also probably nearly 30 years since we had anything you could call a takeaway!
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,681 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Savvy Shopper!
    sheilavw said:
    I recall, although approximately  30 years ago there was one or two of us all pregnant at the same time and having leaving nights out (meals) from work. One lady had just come back off maternity and was invited. She declined because she had just returned to work after a long break and genuinely couldn't afford to go out. The meal was going to be at an Italian restaurant and at the time the cheapest meal was lasagne at something like £3.99.Everyone was begging her to come out, she said that she could just spare £5 so could afford it because she could have this and 1 coke to drink. It was attended by a big group. Several were ordering starters, mains, desserts and bottles of wine. When the bill arrived the people who had all this said "oh let's just all split the bill". Obviously she couldn't afford to do this and was made to feel really bad. I have never forgotten this. I think it is ok to split it, or pay just for what you have had but I think you need to decide at the beginning to avoid any awkwardness or embarrasment!
    Shocking treatment.
    Poor lady.
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