Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my relative about my lottery win from a ticket she got me?

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  • Littledaler
    Littledaler Forumite Posts: 22
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    This is very simple.  Firstly - these tickets are bought for birthdays so are gifts so they belong to the recipient {you wouldn't buy someone a box of chocolates and expect half in return}. It would be a nice thing to buy her a gift from the proceeds.  Secondly - STOP noting the numbers of the tickets you buy for her - they are her tickets and once given, they are nothing to do with you {but hopefully she would buy you a gift with any winnings she may receive}.  
    Paulrob666 - what are you thinking?
  • SheG
    SheG Forumite Posts: 1
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    First of all, congratulations on your win.

    Of course you do not need to gift your relative anything but it would be a lovely unexpected surprise if you were to gift her something.

    I am sure she would be pleased to hear that one of the lottery tickets brought you such an unexpected windfall.
  • emmajnation
    emmajnation Forumite Posts: 3
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    you wouldn't buy someone a box of chocolates and expect half in return
    I would! Well, maybe not half, but I’d certainly expect one or two.
  • diamondz_2
    diamondz_2 Forumite Posts: 1
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    Maybe just maybe she is also checking your tickets 
  • pate-ci0
    pate-ci0 Forumite Posts: 2,496
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    edited 23 March at 9:18PM
    I agree with others that a gift becomes your property and the giver is absolved of any responsibility or ownership of it, whether it be a box of chocolates or a lottery ticket. You have no legal obligation to split any winnings unless that had been decided beforehand.
    Morally, I would look at it this way: firstly, what would you expect should she win? That answer would  strongly colour my own response whether for right or wrong. Secondly, if you had won £10 would you feel obliged to give some of the winnings to her? How about £100, £1000, £1,000,000? I personally would certainly not feel obliged to a 50:50 split of any winnings and would happily spend maybe up to a couple of hundred pounds on myself only. For larger amounts I would consider up to 10% to be a fair largesse to reward the giver but at the end of the day it is your decision, your money and your friendship which will determine what you do.
    Whatever you do I would do it fairly rapidly. If you won some time ago and if the win was life changing, explain that you had to take time to assimilate the enormity of the event and determine what you were going to do with it before letting anyone know.
  • wdywuk
    wdywuk Forumite Posts: 5,292
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    As the ticket was given to you, keep enough for early retirement & what’s left split between who ever
  • carriejj
    carriejj Forumite Posts: 74
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    Congratulations on your win. Well I don't know what the relationship is between you and your family member, and whether you're close or not, but I think I would tell her, yes. It seems quite underhand not to do so. and I couldn't imagine a situation where I wouldn't want to tell in your shoes especially given the nature of the reciprocal arrangement. How would you feel, if, knowing she had won, she decided not to tell you? Would it bother you? 

    What I would say though if it was me is that you've won some money, you'd like to treat her to a meal or pay for her to go on holiday or give a nice gift if you don't want to give cash. Maybe I'd say that I have some debts I want to settle and when I've done
    that, if I've any to spare I might decide to give some to the family.

    But you're not me and at the end of the day, it's your decision. Good luck with whatever you decide to do and congratulations again.  
  • CaptainDun
    CaptainDun Forumite Posts: 2
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    Gifts are given absolutely, without reservation.  Your relative gave you a lottery ticket that is yours absolutely.  If that ticket wins a prize then that prize is yours absolutely - that is the one and only value of a lottery ticket - she gave you that chance of a prize - nothing more nothing less.

    For two reasons I think you should tell her your good news: (1) she may have recorded the numbers and may already know that you've won, and would wonder what you are up to if you DON'T tell her; and (2) she'll get joy from hearing about your good fortune thanks to her gift!
  • CaptainDun
    CaptainDun Forumite Posts: 2
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    nikkij_uk said:
    If she's a close relative, wouldn't she be one of the ones you would be giving some to anyway?
    I would be honest with her. Maybe tell her your plan for some of the money (relatives you'd like to help etc), as she might think that's a good idea and you can plan what to do with the money together?
    I think, legally, the lottery state the winner of the money is the person who paid for the ticket, so I'm not sure where you would stand keeping it all anyway.
    If she's a close enough relative that you buy them for each other in the first place, I would have thought she is someone who you would like to help out in life with a 50% cut of the winnings.
    Actually the owner of the ticket is the one whose name and address is written on the back, or, if none has been written, then it's the holder of the ticket (see section 4 "Ownership of tickets" on the national-lottery in-store rules web page).  So tickets can indeed be given as gifts, and the privilege of winning the prize (and the moral dilemma of what to do with the winnings) belongs to the recipient.


  • Deb2008
    Deb2008 Forumite Posts: 1,140
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    A gift is just that but I do think you should tell her, she may not expect you to share it......problem solved.

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