Could my mum's reckless action (failure to take any action) actually cause physical harm to anyone??

Anonymous868

My mother is quite simply 'not right in the head'.

Following the death of my father (3-years ago) she has chosen to simply not bother with/have any regard for her legal duties as a citizen.
She has been provided countless advice by myself & my sisters :: But due to her attitude of simply not having any urgency about anything / Refuse to take any action she is told needs to be done, we have all had enough of her, and now have ultra minimal contact with her!


She is the owner of a 3-bedroom house, near Windsor.

She evicted the previous tenants back in March (simply because they had requested basic repairs to be done to the property) | Was going to place it for sale on the market, but then half-way through the estate agent drawing up the listing contract, she decided to ''just leave it / see how things go'' (that's she phrase she uses for everything - when she is going to do nothing).

It was explained to her (by me + the estate agent) that if she just left the house ''abandonded'', she would still be legally required to pay council tax on it.
(She hasn't paid it / And is now just ignoring the demand letters for payment)

It was also explained to her (by me + estate agent) that when the winter came the water-tanks would freeze if there was no heating inside the house.
(She ignored this / Now claims we never even told her :: As that's another thing she frequently does, deny reality of conversations which have happened)

I also told her she needed to inform the insurance company that the property now had no-one living there, or else the insurance would likely become void.
(She ignored this, as it would of required her to do something)


On Friday night she informed me that the people who live nextdoor to the property had messaged her, saying the fire-alarm had been going off for hours...
So I drove her to the property.

The water-tank (in the attic) had burst, collapsing almost all the entire ceiling!
Water was pouring down the stairs from the attic / Entire upstairs was flooded / Half of downstairs was flooded / The water had fused all the electricty in the property (causing the fire alarms to trigger)... And so I had to immediately dial 999 and have the fire-service come to turn-off the water-mains from the street + inside the attic, ensure the electricty was off, and that the property was structurally stable!
*The next-door neighbours were coming out concerned about if the water would go through the wall/rot the wall onto their side of the property.

I told my mum that night that the next day she needed to find the insurance-documents for the property (as this is likely £50k+ worth of damage), Plus I would need to phone a specialist workman (to meet us at the property on Sunday or Monday) to get a quote for urgent draining & repair.

She however just said she didn't want me to phone any workman, and to just leave it.



It's now Monday night:
The property is still flooded / The walls are likely starting to rot & decay / The flooring is all underneath ice & water...
My mum has not told the insurance-company / Nor does she have any plans to take any action of any sort :: Instead she is just leaving everything as it is!


I am beyond stressing myself out trying to help her - As she has brought all this on herself due to her stubborness & attitude!

However I am concerned for the residents who live next-door to the property...
And so just wondered if they are in any danger from the property being left in the destroyed & flooded state it is being left in?

(The fire-service said on Friday night that it is 'structurally ok' :: But I am worried that the water simply being left there indefinately could change that?)

MikeJXE

You need to chill, it's your mothers house and her choice. Try to encourage her instead of pushing. 

Anonymous868

MikeJXE said:

You need to chill, it's your mothers house and her choice. Try to encourage her instead of pushing. 

Yes, it is her choice what she chooses to do/not do (and providing no-one else is impacted by her action :: I quite smply don't care anymore what she does)...

My concern however is if her failure-to-act could result in the people who live in the house nextdoor being at risk of physical harm / damage occuring to their property?

(As my mother's choices have already caused alot of concern & disruption to them)

Boat_to_Bolivia

OP I'm not sure the Marriage, relationships and families is the best place for your query.
Try the In My Home or Insurance boards.

MikeJXE

Us old people get like that thankfully not me. Losing your father was a huge shock to her and maybe she don't care anymore, can't see the point perhaps. My sister 84 lost her husband of 63 years and as far as she was concerned life was over. She didn't do anything about anything and 9 months later decided to go to sleep and not wake up. that's what she wanted 

sevenhills

Anonymous868 said:

My mother is quite simply 'not right in the head'.

Following the death of my father (3-years ago) she has chosen to simply not bother with/have any regard for her legal duties as a citizen.

How old is your mother, is it dementia or just a slow loss of mental reasoning?
I have a 95 year old relative that is losing his ability to reason, but his daughter has mental health issues and unable to take control.
Perhaps you need to take control?

MalMonroe

MikeJXE said:

*Us old people get like that thankfully not me. Losing your father was a huge shock to her and maybe she don't care anymore, can't see the point perhaps. My sister 84 lost her husband of 63 years and as far as she was concerned life was over. She didn't do anything about anything and 9 months later decided to go to sleep and not wake up. that's what she wanted 

*No, no 'we' don't. Everyone is different. I'm old-ish - 72 - and haven't 'got' like 'that' either. Age doesn't excuse anything.

This OP's mum sounds as if she needs some help.

But it's her property and her business and unless she actually harms anyone else, does anything illegal or asks for help, there isn't a lot that can be done. 

Anonymous868

sevenhills said:

Anonymous868 said:

My mother is quite simply 'not right in the head'.

Following the death of my father (3-years ago) she has chosen to simply not bother with/have any regard for her legal duties as a citizen.

How old is your mother, is it dementia or just a slow loss of mental reasoning?
I have a 95 year old relative that is losing his ability to reason, but his daughter has mental health issues and unable to take control.
Perhaps you need to take control?

She's in her late 60s.

Over the past 3-years I tried to offer help (repeatedly), but she chooses to just ignore it all - And so for my own personal mental-wellbeing I am now done trying to help her.

And in regards to me 'taking control', I personally am not the owner of the property thus cannot speak to the insurance company on her behalf (without her consent) / Nor can I myself hire & pay a trades-person to go to the property, drain all the water & replace all the damaged structures (the entire ceiling/staircare/floors), unless she consents + pays the cost of all that work.

MalMonroe

Anonymous868 said:

MikeJXE said:

You need to chill, it's your mothers house and her choice. Try to encourage her instead of pushing. 

Yes, it is her choice what she chooses to do/not do (and providing no-one else is impacted by her action :: I quite smply don't care anymore what she does)...

My concern however is if her failure-to-act could result in the people who live in the house nextdoor being at risk of physical harm / damage occuring to their property?

(As my mother's choices have already caused alot of concern & disruption to them)

If your Mum's neighbours are at all concerned, they will have to step up and take appropriate action of their own. Sounds like your Mum can't be reasoned with but if the neighbours take some kind (any kind) of action she will have to do something. 

sevenhills

Anonymous868 said:

sevenhills said:

Anonymous868 said:

My mother is quite simply 'not right in the head'.

Following the death of my father (3-years ago) she has chosen to simply not bother with/have any regard for her legal duties as a citizen.

How old is your mother, is it dementia or just a slow loss of mental reasoning?
I have a 95 year old relative that is losing his ability to reason, but his daughter has mental health issues and unable to take control.
Perhaps you need to take control?

And in regards to me 'taking control', I personally am not the owner of the property thus cannot speak to the insurance company on her behalf (without her consent) / Nor can I myself hire & pay a trades-person to go to the property

But is she mentally capable in the rest of her life?
If she is, then being sectioned is not appropriate.

sammyjammy

Insurance company are unlikely to pay out anyway if the property has been empty for some time!