Feeling very, very sad

affordmylife

you must go to the doctor and get signed of sick.

stress is an illness and you are suffering at the moment.

please go to your doctor and explain what you are going through.

i wish you and your parents all the luck in the world.

Loretta

cazziebo wrote: »

Ceridwen/Loretta - I think the issue is that paid leave is exhausted and if Kittykate has any more time off it will be unpaid. As well as extra travelling expenses, she is also paying for private speech therapy so I would imagine unpaid leave isn't much of an option. It just seems so unfair.

I think she has been on discretionary leave not sick leave, that would be different

Buffy_the_Vampire_Bat

Just leaving you lots of warm snuggly (((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))

Nicki

Carers Allowance is paid if you are looking after a person who receives DLA at the medium or higher rate for at least 40 hours per week, provided you are not earning more than pin money yourself. Anyone in a full time job would not qualify for it sadly.

On the other hand it is possible that KK's parents may qualify for additional benefits based on their needs (payable to them direct) which could be used to help fund the SLT perhaps.

I am fairly sure that it is not legal to treat two members of staff in similar circumstances differently, so if KK is sure that the other member of staff is getting paid leave (rather than unpaid leave), then she should take legal advice about this. However, I have a long memory and recall the thread which KK posted and subsequently deleted about this colleague some months ago, and therefore remember that she is not particularly objective on this subject, so she may make her employment situation worse rather than better if she makes demands based on how she feels the colleague to have been treated if not in full possession of all the facts. I would be amazed if her company was discussing the basis on which the colleague was being allowed leave with all and sundry as this is confidential personnel info, so KK needs to be very sure of her facts with clear evidence to back it up, before she takes this further.

consultant31

Just to add, you can get carers allowance if the person you care for claims attendance allowance as well.

I gave up work in May to look after my parents when Dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He only lived for a few weeks after his diagnosis and Mum (who's nearly 80) is disabled, so can't manage on her own.

The allowance I get is £48.65 and you have to spend at least 35 hours a week caring for them.

I wish you a peaceful Christmas and hope your Mum and Dad make headway soon. Cherish them all you can, they are irreplaceable

Ellie2758

consultant31 wrote: »

Just to add, you can get carers allowance if the person you care for claims attendance allowance as well.

I gave up work in May to look after my parents when Dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He only lived for a few weeks after his diagnosis and Mum (who's nearly 80) is disabled, so can't manage on her own.

The allowance I get is £48.65 and you have to spend at least 35 hours a week caring for them.

I wish you a peaceful Christmas and hope your Mum and Dad make headway soon. Cherish them all you can, they are irreplaceable

And the person themselves can claim DLA, which is paid at varying rates according to how "disabled" they are. Make sure when you fill the forms in that you write how things are on their "worst" days. The forms can be a bit off-putting but if you need help to fill them in there is a number to call or, alternatively, ask at the CAB.

Jane1C

Don't know what made me look at this thread, but I did. I read your post and just thought I would let you know you should be doing all you can to spend the time with your family. I hope you do get yourself signed off sick, so you can be there for your parents.

S O D Christmas, that's not important in the grand scheme of things. I was overseas when my Mum became ill, I only got to spend the last few weeks of her life with her. It was just before Christmas 2 years ago now. Christmas has lost it's importance now.

You really DO need to look after YOU, if you are going to be there for them. I know what you mean when you say you go into automatic mode just trying to cope, it is a survival thing, you can't look too deeply into things, just do what you can.

Hope this makes sense for you, I do wish you well.

magic57

Hi KittyKate
Sorry to hear your news. Sucks doesn't it? My dad had a massive stroke four years ago and is now wheelchair bound. It was a huge shock to us all andwe found that a stroke affects the whole family. My dad could not even swallow for 4 months and had to be tube fed. He can eat now but like you said about your dad he is not the man he was. But he is still my dad and I feel it is very important for me to try to be positive and celebrate with him every improvement however small. Hopefully your dad will make a good recovery but it can take some time. I hope he will still try to paint as he enjoyed it. My dad can write a bit with his left hand. He is right handed and paralysed down the right side. The brain can relearn things in time.
Your parents are lucky to have such a caring daughter. Try to stay positive and don't forget to look after yourself too. x

belfastgirl23

you okay? ....bump