The Mental Debt Struggle...

Keedie

Yes @KajiKita, these little incentives really can keep you boosted and on track don't they? I get a kick out of seeing my tins growing and all the pennies I've been squirreling away in my Chase round up pot and the one that I am putting my cashback in. 

I've been fiddling around with my budget some more as I realised it was very restrictive in the sense that it was idealistic and not realistic. I'll be reducing my debt repayments from £250 to £200 and increasing my sinking funds. I had a long think about the things that crop up from time to time and the things that might lead to a dependency on credit or buy now pay later, and decided that living a full life and being prepared for things was more important than annihilating my debt so quickly that I'm vulnerable to life just happening and setting me back. 

I worked out exactly what I am doing for Christmas in terms of the budget for each person's presents, same with Eid, birthdays, Mother's Day, Father's Day and any special occasions/events that might crop up like weddings, christenings, funerals etc. I also figured out how much I need for the car to cover MOT & service, car tax, breakdown cover, maintenance and to build a fund to pay off the insurance annually. Plus things for my flat like a cooker, new microwave, lampshades, rugs etc. Plus the subscriptions, which I had already figured out more or less, but I've refined it some more. 

My sinking funds won't be fully funded next year, but I'm hoping that by being consistent, I can eventually get to the point where I start a year with everything in place. I've changed the budget from £2,275 to £2,700 a month as that will include the PIP (whilst I still have it) and the small freelance payroll job that I have (whilst I still have it). I figured by the time the freelance fizzles out and if the PIP award changes, I will be in a better position to then be able to revert to my initial budget, and by then, the debt should hopefully be much smaller or paid off. The new categories have an *

Fixed Expenses (£1,500)

• £1,200 = bills, rent, life insurance, car insurance etc - this has been increased from £1,150 to £1,200 as as things like car insurance will go up in September and it gives me a buffer for the increase in rent, council tax and water rates from April 2025, so that the increases are more manageable
• £200 = debt repayments (Barclaycard) - this was reduced from £250 to £200 to increase the bills pot as stated above
• £100 = savings (£50 to Help to Save and £50 emergency fund)

Variable Expenses (£1,200)

• £300 = food and household basics like washing up liquid, toothpaste etc - this increased from £250 to £300 as it is more realistic and includes take aways
• £150 = travel (petrol and son's travelcard)
• £50 = buffer - I realised there was no room for anything unexpected happening, and I aim to not use this and then save whatever is left at the end of the month, but if it is needed, then it's there without juggling all the other categories
• £190 = son's expenses - (spending money reduced from £100 to £90 with the other £10 going towards subscriptions), £100 for college expenses including dinner money 
• £100 = my spending money - this has increased from £75 a month, as I've decided I need to live more and it was okay for me to have the same amount as my son (albeit his is £10 less as he's contributing to the subscriptions).
• £30 = self care* - this will pay for things like prescriptions, hair care or if either of us needs a pick me up
• £30 = family fun* - I hadn't remembered this, but life is for making memories and we don't always do a lot, but this will just roll over each month until we are going to things like the cinema, ice skating (the kids not me 😂) etc
• £250 = sinking funds - based on £50 a week with Christmas/Eid (£10), birthdays/celebrations (£10), car maintenance (£10), buffer for home expenses (£10), subscriptions (£5) and holidays (£5). In a 4 week month it totals £200 with £50 to snowball towards the priority sinking fund in order of the event taking place or fund being needed, and in a 5 week month it is £250 and so there will be no snowball.
• £100 - savings challenges* - I like to treat savings like a game as it's easier to stay motivated, and so these savings challenges when complete will alternate between debt overpayments, boosting sinking funds and the emergency fund. For a 4 week month I'll have £25 to play with and in a 5 week month I'll have £20 a week.

I'm going to trial the above for 3 months and see if it's feasible or if any other adjustments are needed, then take it from there.I'm hoping to start 2025 with a better sense of what I am doing financially and in life, and I figured if I can get on top of this stuff and not have to worry about it, I can concentrate on work stuff and figuring out an alternative career and employer etc. 

Keedie

I've paid the £250 to Barclaycard as my direct debit came out. I've got to sort out that direct debit to reduce it from the end of August. I'm starting to wonder if that's the best approach. I'm starting to doubt the plan that I've come up with, although I know that it gives me the best balance of living life, whilst being mindful of my debts and preparing for the future. I'll have to think about it a bit more before I finalise the August budget in a couple of days...

I'm working on more of the OPG report today. So many moving parts and calculations because we stupidly snoozed on it 🤦🏾‍♀️. But at least I've had a long think about how to make it better for next year and I've called a family meeting this Sunday to talk everyone through my plans on how I'll be managing her expenses moving forward and what they can do to help. I gave my mum an overview what I am thinking and she seemed relieved that we won't be scrambling like this next year. I do also need to build that trusty spreadsheet that will see us through.

I've been noticing less and less moths and I'm cautiously optimistic. I miss having food in my cupboards and seasoning. I've been buying pre-seasoned chicken and it's just not remotely the same. When they're all completely gone, I need to have a serious deeeeeeeep clean of the kitchen, and my sisters said that they'll help me as I can't move my arms too much and I get very tired too quickly and have to go and lie down 😬. My son is then going to repaint the kitchen so it's all nice and fresh. And then I'll be doing a very big food shop and I'm going to be so excited to get things back to normal. I want to go to Ikea this weekend and have a look at the airtight containers so that I can get a sense of dimensions. My imagination isn't that strong when it comes to trying to figure these things out by browsing online. I remember once that I brought a dining table set from Argos and it was far too big even without being extended, because I couldn't visualise what it would look like in my living room 😬😂.

Cherryfudge

That's a complex lot of things to keep on top of, particularly the OPG report, but hopefully in future it will be a lot simpler. Keep going, you'll get there!

The moth situation is a real pain - we are currently getting invaded by a mouse (singular so far, but that's more than enough) so I do sympathise. Also (thankfully) mice don't fly so he's limited in what he can get into. How will you know when the moths are absolutely gone? And would fly paper help?

It's good you have family help with the deep clean, and when the fresh paint is on it will be lovely. Now I want to paint our kitchen, though it was tiled a couple of years ago so it's still 'new' compared to most of the house. That feeling of a fresh look is so nice though.

When you go to IKEA, take a tape measure and a note of the inside dimensions of the cupboards (you have probably already thought of that) - the more you have written down, the lower the chances of if going wrong. You could even pre-research standard sizes online and do the maths, but I agree there's nothing like seeing things in real life.

badmemory

I agree with the need to actually see things, some people do & some don't.  I also use squared paper to do the shape of the space & then put in it whatever I'm looking for/at.  Graph paper works as well & you can put any opening doors or drawers on as well

Keedie

Thanks for the advice @Cherryfudge and @badmemory about the containers and visually seeing things. It's nice to know that I am not the only one that needs to view things. I've not got around to this as yet, because I've been so weak and tired. That OPG report finished me off and I've not been able to sleep properly due to pain in my right shoulder and having a chronic fatigue flare up. So I'm reliant on little cat naps at the moment to keep me going.

The guy from occupational therapy came out today to assess me for a wet room to be installed and it was kinda embarassing as my flat was very untidy, as I've just been lacking energy and I've got so much laundry to sort out. My son did a big declutter of the living room, but I've not done my bit as yet. It's all just staring me in the face. 

Anyways, he did a bunch of measurements and took down a history of my medical conditions and how I manage etc. He said I'll get a report and a letter by the end of the month and then I'll need to contact the team that deals with the adaptations and get an appointment for a surveyor to come out and assess everything and to confirm when the work will be done and costs etc. I'm very excited about having a wet room as it will make life so much easier. Hopefully my financial contribution won't be too much.

I worked out how to keep Barclaycard at £250 a month, even though the minimum payment has dropped to 1% and the amount that I have to pay is £71. And I've highlighted where I've made the adjustment as it's all in bold.

Fixed Expenses (£1,550) - increased from £1,500

• £1,200 = bills, rent, life insurance, car insurance etc - this has been increased from £1,150 to £1,200 as as things like car insurance will go up in September and it gives me a buffer for the increase in rent, council tax and water rates from April 2025, so that the increases are more manageable
• £250 = debt repayments (Barclaycard) reverted to £250 whilst keeping the bill pot at £1,200
• £100 = savings (£50 to Help to Save and £50 emergency fund)

Variable Expenses (£1,150) - reduced from £1,200

• £300 = food and household basics like washing up liquid, toothpaste etc - this increased from £250 to £300 as it is more realistic and includes take aways
• £150 = travel (petrol and son's travelcard)
• £50 = buffer - I realised there was no room for anything unexpected happening, and I aim to not use this and then save whatever is left at the end of the month, but if it is needed, then it's there without juggling all the other categories
• £190 = son's expenses - (spending money reduced from £100 to £90 with the other £10 going towards subscriptions), £100 for college expenses including dinner money 
• £100 = my spending money - this has increased from £75 a month, as I've decided I need to live more and it was okay for me to have the same amount as my son (albeit his is £10 less as he's contributing to the subscriptions).
• £30 = self care* - this will pay for things like prescriptions, hair care or if either of us needs a pick me up
• £30 = family fun* - I hadn't remembered this, but life is for making memories and we don't always do a lot, but this will just roll over each month until we are going to things like the cinema, ice skating (the kids not me 😂) etc
• £200 = sinking funds - based on £30 a week instead of £50 as everything will be £5 instead of a mixture of £10 and £5. So, Christmas/Eid (£5), birthdays/celebrations (£5), car maintenance (£5), buffer for home expenses (£5), subscriptions (£5) and holidays (£5) for a total of £30 a week. In a 4 week month it totals £120 with an £80 snowball (£20 a week) for a targeted sinking fund, and in a 5 week month it totals £150, so this will leave a £50 snowball for a 5 week month (£10 a week). I've worked out the ideal amounts for each sinking fund, and the order in which they will be a priority to make it easier to save.
• £100 - savings challenges* - I like to treat savings like a game as it's easier to stay motivated, and so these savings challenges when complete will alternate between debt overpayments, boosting sinking funds and the emergency fund. For a 4 week month I'll have £25 to play with and in a 5 week month I'll have £20 a week.

So I topped up my sinking funds today with £5 each as stated above, and the target fund for August is my son's birthday and at £25 a week (standard £5 plus £20 snowball for a 4 week month), that will fund the last £100 needed. I can then concentrate on Christmas from September 2024 to December 2024 and then focus on the car from January 2025 as the MOT and service is due in April 2025.

Well that's the plan for now anyways...

badmemory

Sensible about keeping the Barclaycard at £250.  I've just noticed my cc minimum payment is 1% too.  It is almost as if they want to keep you in debt to them forever.  Surely not!!  Mind you I had the first ever email froom my cc that said you have reached 90% usage on your cc.  I have spent rather a lot this last month though so no big surprise.  I think I'll use my backup one for a couple of weeks.  I think they don't like you going over 90% because their interest can put you over your limit. 

Makingabobor2

Hope the wet room doesn't take too long to sort out. Would be a brilliant help to you if you could get one installed. 

AntoMac

If you get the wet room installed Keedie it will be a real positive life changer. Fingers crossed it happens pretty soon

Keedie

I think you're right about the 90% usage and the interest @badmemory. I've got a spendy few months coming up as there is so much stuff in the kitchen that needs replacing. I've had to throw out so many things because of these stupid moths, that it's almost like I'll be starting from scratch in a new kitchen. So I reckon that Argos Card is going to get a workout for whatever I can't manage upfront 🤦🏾‍♀️. But I also got my £100 Amazon voucher from my internet provider, so that will help with some of the storage containers etc that I need. It's just a shame that it didn't arrive before Prime Day as I could have really got some good deals.

I'm glad that I've managed to work out how to keep Barclaycard at £250, still create a small buffer for the bills pot by having those expenses set at £1,200 a month, and still contribute to the sinking funds. It means that the sinking funds take a bit of a back seat, but it's okay, as I can build them up through my savings challenges if needed. But at least, I got to keep all categories for now. If it doesn't work with £5 for each category, as in I don't have enough of what I need, I can always revert to £10 for Christmas/Eid, £10 for car maintenanance, £5 for birthdays and £5 for home stuff. As once my son's birthday is out of the way, the focus is mainly on Christmas, then the car and then it'll be Eid.

Yes @Makingabobor2 and @AntoMac, it would really make a difference to my quality of life to have a wet room. And so I also hope it doesn't take too long for everything to be sorted. The Occupational Therapist said that the report goes to the team that does the work but he can't say how long it all takes, as they will send a surveyor first, as they have to make sure that what he recommends can actually be done. Fingers crossed it all can. He said that the shower would have a retractable seat that I can pull down and sit on, so when my son is using it, he won't have it in his way. My council doesn't move very swiftly, so I reckon by the time I call the next team in late August/early September depending on when the report comes through, I'll get an appointment within around 6-8 weeks from that. I'm hoping to have it all sorted by Christmas 🤞🏾🤞🏾🤞🏾.

beanielou

A wet room changed my life.  How it happened for me was once the surveyor had been & it was signed off & my financial contribution aagreed it was put out to tender,  Once the contractor was agreed it was a case of waiting for them to have availabilty to carry out the work.