The Mental Debt Struggle...

beanielou

I remember one sleepless night listening to Morrisey at 4 am. Sigh. 

LittleMissDetermined

Fingers crossed for some good results tomorrow Keedie. He's worked hard

~FlowerPot~

Keedie said:

Thanks @beanielou, that's a good tip. They gave me promethazine and told me to take it by 8.30/9pm at that latest. But I kept forgetting so I'd remember when it was too late and didn't sleep the whole night. I went to Tesco to buy a Vileda mop as they had it on offer, and by the time I got back and remembered it was 11pm so I couldn't take it and I didn't sleep until nearly 3am and I was awake by 6.45am. So I'm running on fumes at the moment.

How about setting a reminder on your phone to help you?

Cherryfudge

I hope the sleep resolves soon, it's miserable being so tired especially the bit where you're lying awake.

And loads of good wishes for your son's results.

Keedie

I actually managed about 6 hours sleep last night! 

  

I still feel exhausted, but not as bad as I have done, so that's a blessing. Lying awake in the dark desperate to sleep is an evil torture isn't it @Cherryfudge? I've been awake so many times at 3am, 4am, 5am @beanielou that it's just depressing now.

Thanks for the well wishes for my son's results, but he doesn't get them until next Thursday 24 August as it's A Levels today and GCSEs next week. But you're right @LittleMissDetermined, he did work very hard in the end. Best of luck to your son @~FlowerPot~.

My coin savings challenges are coming along, and I've managed to save £6 in £2 coins as I keep getting them in my change. So there's a silver lining. I'll be using that tin of money for a holiday at some point.

AntoMac

Please forgive me Keedie, I always follow your story with great 8nterest but my MSE Forum radar has been a bit off lately. Probably been too busy trying to run to stand still.
I love your humorous reaction to getting a whole 6 hours sleep! Sleep deprivation really is terrible isn’t it. Now I adore my cat but he has taken to yowling at random hours of the night and it has really disturbed my sleep pattern. I think he’s losing his marbles.
Great that you are so close to 50 per cent of your debt repaid. Keep going. 

Makingabobor2

I have also been having trouble sleeping the last few months and a friend of mine who is a holistic therapist, has recommended and app called Calm. I've just downloaded it to try the 7 day free trial and then I think its something like £40 a year of you want to keep it. Not sure if it will help, but worth a try. 

Keedie

I've never given any thought to cats or dogs etc losing their marbles as they age @AntoMac, but it makes sense. Sorry your cat has lost sense of time and is making noise at all times! I can imagine that would have shocked and baffled you when it first kept you awake. As for my reaction to sleep, if I don't find a way to laugh about it all, I'd cry 😂.

Thanks for that tip @Makingabobor2, I'll have to check out that Calm app. I'm sorry you're also having problems with sleep though, it's so frustrating isn't it?

I've been in a bit of downtime for the last couple of days. I've been put back on a small dose of my bipolar medication for the first time since January 2022, and it's really knocked me for six. It's starting to ease up as I was all foggy beforehand, but it's not been great few days. But I'm hoping it'll get easier as time goes on...

I've spent a bit too much money in the last few days and I'm just trying to get on top of things again. Both of my front tires were virtually bald and I didn't notice, but luckily my brother borrowed my car on Friday and was quick to point it out to me. So I spent £150 on two new tyres that I hadn't planned for and I'd dipped into my car maintenance fund and didn't rebuild it, so the emergency fund took a hit. Dunno if I'll be reaching my £1,000 target by 31 December 2023 now. But at least the car is safe to drive. The tyre shop told me that I was very lucky I wasn't spotted by the police - oops! 🤦🏾‍♀️

beanielou

Better to be safe.
Hope the meds help & settle down.

Keedie

Thanks @beanielou. My brain feels less and less synthetically foggy as the days go on. And yes I agree, better to be safe. I couldn't believe the tyres were so bald and I don't know how I didn't notice. I'm usually a little more on the ball than that. But luckily my brother pointed it out.

I've got to sit down at some point this week and have a good think about my budget. My half pay starts on 5 September 2023, so my income will be a lot lower for October. But as I've overspent in August, things are going to be a lot tighter for September as well. I'm trying to work out all of the additional costs of my son going to college and not being eligible for a bursary. It's getting a bit dicey in terms of the budget.

I had an appointment with Occupational Health yesterday and the guy agreed that I am still not fit for work. My manager has been trying to get me back into work and sent me to them as I've been off for a while now and "we need to get you back to work". My current fit note ends on 31 August 2023, and I never said I was back on 1 September, I told her that I would review it with my doctor towards the end of August, but I think she convinced herself that it was enough time (irrespective of how I am feeling/coping) and as they have hired more people, there's no stress anymore and I need to basically suck it up and return to work. But if it was just work stress and there are changes being put in place, yes the stress would be reduced, but the reality is that I have bipolar, they all knew this and they ignored my desperate pleas for help and support and I've had a severe episode that I'm struggling with. It doesn't just alleviate because they've finally employed more people.