Break up I don't want

BrassicWoman

steveouk said:

Thank you for all your comments i will try to read and reply a bit more tomorrow. I was keeping it together but only until about 7pm. Broke down in so many tears. Lots of tea and hugs with parents. Gotta pull myself together for work tomorrow 

Or you could have a few days off, get yourself a fit note.

steveouk

Surprised myself I coped OK with work today. Exhausted after being so upset yesterday but made it through today. Kept up with healthy food and tea by my parents. Still trying to a way to get her back despite it seemingly impossible.  I know it's silly but I still want to try.
I am sure I will be able to talk more as this week goes on and plot a way forward 

MovingForwards

Have a read through all your old threads about this relationship, from before getting married to date. Read through your debt ones too. All the answers are there.

Then be totally honest with yourself.

I'm sorry, but it sounds like she has had enough and moved on after all these years of going through the same things over and over again.

It's not an easy decision for anyone to make, but once done it's rarely undone. 

Seek counseling for yourself to come to terms with it.

Let her go, move on and in time you'll be a lot happier. You'll be smiling, relaxed and not on edge.

BrassicWoman

steveouk said:

Still trying to a way to get her back despite it seemingly impossible.  

I believe that loving someone include respecting their wishes, which have been made very clear.

I am sorry for your pain. I believe you should leave her alone.

tooldle

I agree with the above two posters. I’ve read through a few of your previous threads (spanning many years) and conclude your  relationship  is dysfunctional. You may not be able to see it at this moment in time but, your wife is doing you both a great favour in bringing the situation to a close. 

Yes, you are upset and have regrets and these are all normal things to feel in the circumstances. One person does not a relationship make. Accept it, give yourself time to grieve and then start building your new future..

steveouk

Well after the 10 day break staying at my parents I came back this week.  It has been a few days and I have gone from being strong and confident to being broken and upset again. 
Looks like she wants me to move out and she us staying in the house. 
It will be a struggle with little money left living g on my own. And I need to get a car so a lot of expense that I will gave to do bit by bit. 
She seems to be saying she will buy my share of the equity in the house? That would be 40k but am i not also entitled to half of savings and value if the car we own jointly? 

CookieMonster

Agree to nothing.
Sign nothing.
Get a solicitor.
And read through some of the posts on this forum about divorce and splitting of assets.

steveouk

Not even agree to move out ? 

Savvy_Sue

steveouk said:

Not even agree to move out ? 

You know the saying "possession is 9/10ths of the law"? 

See a solicitor. You moving out and her staying put may be fair and reasonable, or it may not. If you are to move out, how that is arranged and what the arrangements are is important: as you say, there is the equity in the house, there are savings, there is a car. 

Will she be able to take the mortgage on alone? If not, selling and splitting may be a better option. 

Be polite, be respectful, but you have equal rights to stay in the house. If she no longer wishes to live with you, she can move out as easily as you can, no? 

london21

Do not rush into anything.

Take your time.

Work on getting yourself ok.