Evicting an adult child/alternative accommodation

safvoxi

If he wants to burn bridges, he can tell her to leave. She'll need to contact the council to sort housing.

If he wants a relationship with her and his grandchild, can he help her finance somewhere to live? He could also chuck in some money when he sells the property?

It's a sad situation for both parties but their relationship may improve if they are not living together.

theoretica

Tigsteroonie said:

She didn't like the idea of the homeless hostel, but she'll like it even less if she has to care for a baby in that environment. Better to be made homeless now and go through the hostel phase, hopefully it'll be short, whilst still a single person. 

Also, if she goes through this now, while he still owns the house, he can provide storage for all the baby things until the sale goes through and hopefully she has somewhere else to keep them.  He would also be in a position to provide emergency sanctuary in a way he wouldn't if he has moved away.

Marvel1

celeliza said:

  She is so horrible to him and has already threatened that she doesn't want anything to do him and he is not have anything to do with her baby!

Sorted, it's a goodbye and change the locks. 

KxMx

I'm not doubting she has behaved poorly, but being "flabbergasted and dissapointed" at the news of a coming grandchild isn't very nice.

My own mother gave me the "don't come home pregnant" speech, an attitude I'm sure she regrets now since she won't be getting any grandchildren from me.

Ms_Chocaholic

The sooner he "kicks her out" the better it will be for her as hopefully she might have a chance of having her own place by the time the baby arrives.  Can grandad speak to his daughter and explain why he's doing it and why he's doing it now.  Make sure that he does it as early on in the week as he can and not leave it until a Friday.

Reginald74

Marvel1 said:

celeliza said:

  She is so horrible to him and has already threatened that she doesn't want anything to do him and he is not have anything to do with her baby!

Sorted, it's a goodbye and change the locks. 

Totally agree with this. Sounds like the best for everyone concerned. The danger is he leaves the house, she becomes some sort of tenant, and it is then impossible to remove her.

davilown

KxMx said:

I'm not doubting she has behaved poorly, but being "flabbergasted and dissapointed" at the news of a coming grandchild isn't very nice.

My own mother gave me the "don't come home pregnant" speech, an attitude I'm sure she regrets now since she won't be getting any grandchildren from me.

Whilst I totally agree with you that the first point (as the pregnancy has already happened) is totally after the fact, harsh and unnecessary, I’m pretty sure that very few parents do not regret the “don’t come home pregnant” speech. The majority of parents will know how hard it was to have children young without a job, partner or home behind them, and didn’t want their children going through the same hardship. 

davilown

Just to adjust to add some context, my partner was pregnant at 17 and we did it the hard way. However we both did okay at college and Uni so we’re now in our early 40s with kids left home enjoying the ‘freedom’ we didn’t have in our teens and 20’s.
And yes, we certainly had the ‘don’t come home pregnant’ chats on more than one occasion.

KxMx

I appreciate your further response and do see your point. 
However my own mother was married, working and not that young when her first child was born-  I have one sibling that is also child free and as a committed bachelor dedicated to work, very unlikely to have kids.


After earlier giving me the "don't come home pregnant" speech, she got very jealous when her sister became a grandmother, making frequent comments about her lack of grandchildren in front of me to other family members. She knows I am not child free by choice. 

I had to ask her eventually to discuss it privately with family or her friends when I wasn't around because I found it too distressing.
I tried to understand her pain (after all I'll go through that as well when my friends start being made grandparents) but she wasn't considering mine. 


So I do get sensitive at times about these issues but stand by my first comment, that it is a shame the news of a coming grandchild was met with such a reaction. 

Reginald74

KxMx said:

After earlier giving me the "don't come home pregnant" speech, she got very jealous when her sister became a grandmother, making frequent comments about her lack of grandchildren in front of me to other family members. She knows I am not child free by choice. 

I had to ask her eventually to discuss it privately with family or her friends when I wasn't around because I found it too distressing.
I tried to understand her pain (after all I'll go through that as well when my friends start being made grandparents) but she wasn't considering me.

Sounds like a piece of work.