My 2 year battle to try to keep our home

Tiredbutdetermined

Woohoo! 

My mum has just sent me £50 to take a little more off my credit card. She is just awesome 🤩 
I am hoping to have the credit card gone in 2 months then I can move to phase 2, whatever that is!

lucielle

Excellent 
L

Tiredbutdetermined

Not much to update this morning for my debt busting diary but as a total aside I have actually made a start on my uni assignment which is due on the 10th. I need to do a load of reading this afternoon then hopefully a lot more writing tomorrow.

Steerpike88

Hey! Just come to say that I've read your diary and you are doing amazingly. You have so much grace and determination and your husband is just rubbish that took himself out.  That other woman isn't so much a gold-digger as a bin lady. I definitely second getting a different solicitor, tell them EXACTLY what you want and don't let them talk you down from  your VERY realistic goals.

I haven't been in the same situation but when I let my ex (many years ago now) he took revenge by taking money from me for bills and rent that was due from the flat I left and not paying it then sending bailiffs at me. He also took the whole deposit for the flat and kept it for himself and I was too traumatised and wearied to fight because I became homeless after I left him.  So I really admire you and your strength. 

enthusiasticsaver

Brie said:

Likely it's just me but I always wonder about having an emergency fund when one is in debt.  Surely all the money should be thrown at the debt to get rid of interest and then allow the savings to mount up.  

I don't have anything that I would call an emergency fund.  What I do have is credit.  If there is an emergency I will use my credit and then ensure I have a way to pay that back to zero. 

Likely that I have this attitude as I have a flexi mortgage so the more money I have against that the less interest I pay each month.  It is absolutely pointless for me to have a separate account with a nest egg of any sort while I'm being charged interest for the mortgage.

The suggestion of building an emergency fund is to get those who depend on credit away from the habit of using it and learning to live within their income. Nothing more demotivating than working hard to reduce debt then building it up again by having to use a card again in an emergency. Also if people don’t have access to 0% credit using a card means anything put on it is more expensive due to interest. 

jwil

enthusiasticsaver said:

Brie said:

Likely it's just me but I always wonder about having an emergency fund when one is in debt.  Surely all the money should be thrown at the debt to get rid of interest and then allow the savings to mount up.  

I don't have anything that I would call an emergency fund.  What I do have is credit.  If there is an emergency I will use my credit and then ensure I have a way to pay that back to zero. 

Likely that I have this attitude as I have a flexi mortgage so the more money I have against that the less interest I pay each month.  It is absolutely pointless for me to have a separate account with a nest egg of any sort while I'm being charged interest for the mortgage.

The suggestion of building an emergency fund is to get those who depend on credit away from the habit of using it and learning to live within their income. Nothing more demotivating than working hard to reduce debt then building it up again by having to use a card again in an emergency. Also if people don’t have access to 0% credit using a card means anything put on it is more expensive due to interest. 

In addition to this, CC companies do have a habit of suddenly reducing credit limits etc, it's risky to assume it will always be available, particularly if you have a poor credit history.

Tiredbutdetermined

Steerpike88 said:

Hey! Just come to say that I've read your diary and you are doing amazingly. You have so much grace and determination and your husband is just rubbish that took himself out.  That other woman isn't so much a gold-digger as a bin lady. I definitely second getting a different solicitor, tell them EXACTLY what you want and don't let them talk you down from  your VERY realistic goals.

I haven't been in the same situation but when I let my ex (many years ago now) he took revenge by taking money from me for bills and rent that was due from the flat I left and not paying it then sending bailiffs at me. He also took the whole deposit for the flat and kept it for himself and I was too traumatised and wearied to fight because I became homeless after I left him.  So I really admire you and your strength. 

Thank you so much. I am so tired at the moment that I don’t see myself as strong, just a tired mess! However, tough times don’t last but tough people do.

I very much love your characterisation of her as a bin lady 🤣

Tiredbutdetermined

Yesterday was a NSD so a whole £1 off my credit card!

I am feeling very frustrated with the slow direct debits over the bank holidays. I want to be able to tick them off as paid! Clearly worrying about this is my way of detracting from the many other things I should be worrying about! 

A money saving win. My milk went out of date on the 31st and I am still drinking it in my tea. This might also create a weight loss win if I make myself ill!! I should send a child to coop but that is full of danger as last time I sent the boy twin for a cheap back of butter he decided to treat me so a massive tub of lurpack….not on offer….with my money!

More uni work today  
My get up and go has definitely got up and gone

joedenise

Could you just give the child enough money to get only the milk that you need?  That way he or she wouldn't be able to buy you a "treat" with your money!

Spendless

Ahhhh I think we've all got a tale to tell about kids and sending to shops. One day I sent mine for bread for my elderly Grandmother who lived a few streets away and gave them some extra money for sweets as a thank you. They returned with the sweets and no bread! They weren't impressed about being sent again.

And then there's the time I was waiting in the car at the train station waiting for Mr S to arrive on a delayed London train, so I gave DS £5 (the only money I had on me) to get some sweets to occupy him and his younger sister that I remained in the car with, only for him to return with a box of chocolates for £4.99 and 1p change!

For many years I've bought filtered milk, usually at Aldi, sometimes at Tesco and only if forced to Cravendale. It's more expensive, but in 13 years of buying, I've only thrown maybe 2 bottles out for going off (because they were left out). We're not huge milk drinkers though, otherwise it'd be too expensive. Maybe get yourself some long life or powdered milk in for emergencies?