Missy’s Surviving the storm so we can dance in the rain.

twiggy86

Hey Missy. Just caught up on your diary and just wanted to cheer you on from the sidelines as you're doing incredibly!

One comment - you seem to host quite a lot but are these people aware that you're struggling? Could you open with them that you'd love to see them but money is tight so could they contribute x, y and z? That way you don't miss out but it reduces the impact on your budget. I've decided to be totally open with people and get rid of the "shame" of things being financially very tight at the moment, as it is nothing to be ashamed of when you're working incredibly hard!  

jwil

Well done on stretching the mince

Always worth asking BG if they'll reduce the DD.  Have a look at your usage from last year and calculate what you think it should be.

missymoo81

Need to find some positivity and energy from somewhere. I barely slept last night, due to too much coffee and things weighing on my mind. Looks like it’s set to be a beautiful day. Ive got an hour of work at home and then an hour at actual work. I’ve still got to fill in my application for possible job. It’s taking a while as it’s quite in depth. I’m going to try and finish it today. I’ve just realised there’s 16 jobs and hundreds of applicants. 

I need to go shopping today, so will try and do that as cheaply as possible, OH got a few bits yesterday which he paid for. Car insurance ended up costing me £35 more this month than allocated, so need to find that from somewhere 🙄🙄🙄. This week is super busy but the week after I should get a bit of a break. I was going to take a bit of a break in June but I don’t think I can afford it so I’m going to try and only work certain days that week so that I have more free time to do stuff like, the garden and painting the house.

Hope you’re all ok.

jwil

Hope you've had a good day and feel a bit brighter.

Good luck with the application.  Remember to look at what qualities they are wanting and make sure you state that you can do them.  I know of a job recently where loads of people got discarded because one of the essential requirements was being computer literate and not one of them mentioned they could use office software.  If there's loads of applicants, then a small thing like that (even though those people probably assumed their job history demonstrated that they were computer literate) will mean you don't make the first sift.

missymoo81

I wrote a lovely long post yesterday, then lost it! Something along the lines of spending £24 on shopping but I need to get apples. We had curry on Monday and hot dogs and potato salad yesterday. I’m still trying to do my application. I will apply but the more I think about it the more worried I am about child care and that I don’t know how I’m going to fit it around my life when their dad works away and OH is likely to get a job working random days etc. I don’t have family that could have them and their dad works away and I have no clues as to how long he’s ever away for and it’s constantly changing. Any ideas on that would be appreciated.

So my day today is writing that up and working a bit and then writing that up some more. 

Roo passed out yesterday, think it’s a mixture of him falling over and being dehydrated i did it often as a child.

My hay fever is horrendous at the moment. I’ve got swollen eyes etc need to get some antihistamine.

Budget is a bit all over the place but I think I can claw it back. 

jwil

We have never had any help with childcare until this year.  We've managed, though I won't say it hasn't been hard at times.   The easiest options are before/after school club.  It will really depend on how many hours and when.  Wrap around childcare at my school is flexible, so you only use it when you need it.  There are various ways of covering school holidays with activity clubs.  Childminder, babysitter that you can hire as and when.  It will be easier to figure out once you know what you/OH are doing.

Bluegreen143

I know it’s not possible for everyone, but I’ve negotiated at 3pm finish at my work - I only work 26 hours a week because I want a Friday off with Bambi, but when she starts school I may switch to doing a four day week (around 30 hours) but split it over the five days and continue to finish at 3pm. If you do that then it’s only holidays to cover and there are a few options - their dad taking them for some of it, you taking annual leave, you taking some parental leave (I’m doing that this summer), holiday clubs etc. You’d manage, people do. We don’t have much help from family either as nobody lives close enough to do school pick ups or they work full time, that’s why I’ve focused on getting earlier finishes rather than worrying too much about the holidays as you can always use holiday childcare for those. But afterschool club or a childminder is an option too.

missymoo81

Thank you! I appreciate your input. It’s a shift pattern of 2 days 2 nights 9-6 and then nights are 6pm-9am. It’s a difficult one to work around and the children are off to high school in a year and 2 years but it’s super far away and will need go be dropped and picked up from the bus stop. Stressing about it a bit. Not sure what with OH looking to change his career too. 

amanda_p

Never underestimate shift work including nights and how it will impact on everything! My son is a surgeon, DIL a nurse so between them they have done many night shifts. With the night shifts the day before is difficult because if you don’t/can’t sleep you are up for 24 hours. The same the day after a night shift, do you try to sleep for a few hours which in turn then messes up that nights sleep. Throw children into the equation it becomes very difficult.

I don’t know what sort of job you are applying for but if it’s something that can run over allotted time, something stressful sleeping then becomes a real problem. My son has often got home from operating at night and ended up going back the next day due to problems in theatre. So your night shift rolls into the next day and then having to work the following night with about 4 hours sleep. Not ideal.

The hours look fine on paper but the reality is very different.

Bluegreen143

Hmmmm shift work isn’t ideal with young kids, I’d agree, unless it’s only one of you and the other takes charge of pick ups and drop offs. 

If you could get something which is office based hours like 9-5ish it would definitely be easier - might mean you need to use afterschool - but it’d be doable. A 6pm finish might be a bit late for afterschool pick up and obviously you’d need childcare for the night shift. Will your OH do the childcare for you for the moment?

Red has no guaranteed finish time and he starts at 7.30am. Lately his finish has been 2-3pm most days 😂 but in theory he could work til 6 or 7. This does limit what hours I can work as I know I need to be drop off and pick up person (two different locations too as I’ve still one at nursery).