Estate Agents Blurb

Skiddaw1

Sunsaru said:

Skiddaw1 said:

Thrugelmir said:

No more cynical than the vendor that has the log burner ablaze,  a number of reed diffusers dotted around, cooking bread in the oven. Then offers you a cup of tea and a piece of homemade cake while showing you pictures taken of them refurbishing of the property. 

That's almost exactly what we did when we sold previous house! (only difference was open fire rather than log burner).

Please tell me you had chestnuts roasting on it!!

If we'd been on the market prior to Christmas I probably would have done!

Thrugelmir

Skiddaw1 said:

Thrugelmir said:

No more cynical than the vendor that has the log burner ablaze,  a number of reed diffusers dotted around, cooking bread in the oven. Then offers you a cup of tea and a piece of homemade cake while showing you pictures taken of them refurbishing of the property. 

That's almost exactly what we did when we sold previous house! (only difference was open fire rather than log burner).

We did a full structural survey and received a 12 page report. The refurbishment was a bodge. The newly painted walls were an attempt to cover up the damp. The valuation came in at £35k under our offer. Fortunately the EA ended up reimbursing our survey fees. We walked. 

GaleSF63

Thrugelmir said:

No more cynical than the vendor that has the log burner ablaze,  a number of reed diffusers dotted around, cooking bread in the oven. Then offers you a cup of tea and a piece of homemade cake while showing you pictures taken of them refurbishing of the property. 

A friend did the usual smell of real coffee brewing  for an expected viewer, who didn't turn up - till 3 hours later when he'd given up and put the chip pan on. 

Slinky

GaleSF63 said:

Thrugelmir said:

No more cynical than the vendor that has the log burner ablaze,  a number of reed diffusers dotted around, cooking bread in the oven. Then offers you a cup of tea and a piece of homemade cake while showing you pictures taken of them refurbishing of the property. 

A friend did the usual smell of real coffee brewing  for an expected viewer, who didn't turn up - till 3 hours later when he'd given up and put the chip pan on. 

Mmmm chips......

Drawingaline

When I look at an advert, first is the photos, then the floor plan, then the map. I very rarely read the blurb. 

If an advert doesn't have a floorplan on it I wouldn't even bother with it. For me that is really important.

RS2OOO

74jax said:

I wonder how many vendors refuse to sign these off. 

Yep.
Told them I'm not allowing this rubbish to be used advertising my home.
And also moaned at them for not listing the attached double garage dimensions - It is by far the biggest room in the house after all.
I subsequently wrote the advert myself. We had 13 viewings booked within 24 hours of going on Rightmove and had received 10 offers within 2 working days.

It is also a major bugbear of mine that many agents don't list garage dimensions, or even whether property has a garage, yet no garage or a garage too small to fit a car is a deal breaker for me, and many other people I know.

In one listing I recently viewed it said:
".....moving into the beautiful modern living room you will be impressed to discover a place where so many diverse activities can be enjoyed by everyone in your family and even your friends"

!!!!!!? It was just a square room with laminate flooring, 2 sofas and a TV.

GaleSF63

Drawingaline said:

When I look at an advert, first is the photos, then the floor plan, then the map. I very rarely read the blurb. 

If an advert doesn't have a floorplan on it I wouldn't even bother with it. For me that is really important.

Irritating yes, but don't dismiss a house that might be exactly what you want just because the estate agent is inefficient. 

Skiddaw1

GaleSF63 said:

Thrugelmir said:

No more cynical than the vendor that has the log burner ablaze,  a number of reed diffusers dotted around, cooking bread in the oven. Then offers you a cup of tea and a piece of homemade cake while showing you pictures taken of them refurbishing of the property. 

A friend did the usual smell of real coffee brewing  for an expected viewer, who didn't turn up - till 3 hours later when he'd given up and put the chip pan on. 

I'd have bought it on the spot!!

RS2OOO

Photo's stretched so much that I have mistaken the toilet for a bath.

Driveways that look capable of carrying 4 cars but Google Maps shows a single car shoe horned in and overhanging onto the pavement.

And 99% of properties for sale this year seem to be in highly sought after areas.

Getting_greyer

"Well regarded village/town/area of..." 

Translation: "you probably won't be stabbed in the street."