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Sharing one-time maternity allowance payment with partner?
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it seems the OP wants to be in charge of 'her' money and to repay her OH for anything he buys for the baby.
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Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.0 -
Personally I would just tell your partner, sorry No, am putting it towards the medical expenses. End of discussion What happens if you don't pay the medical fees? I'm guessing they send an enforceable bill? If, I'm correct then that bill needs prioritising.
Some people are strange though. I had some maternity money for my first baby (paid based on my working history). I used the money to buy a 2nd hand car to get me, baby and toddler around. Lost count of the amount of people including close in-laws that said that my husband was buying me a car! No he wasn't. WE were buying a car that would be in my name in order to get OUR children around, using the maternity money to pay for it.2 -
Spendless said:Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.
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74jax said:This site is in England and I'm not sure will understand the maternity allowance side of things here or what a flat payment is.
To me it doesn't sound unreasonable to go in a joint account, but that's based on me having no idea what it is and thinking it's 'joint' for the baby.0 -
Retireby40 said:Spendless said:Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.
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This one is a 50/50 one for me, and largely depends on how you manage your own finances.
We largely manage our own finances and keep them separate, paying a fixed amount into a joint account every month for the bills etc to go out. This includes a credit card in my name that is used for household spending, but not any other credit cards we hold. In this case I'd argue it's reasonable for you to keep the money unless he has incurred significant expense too.
If both salaries etc were to be paid into a joint account, I equally could understand his logic that this should be the case with the maternity payment too.
Ultimately, the 'right thing' comes down to your relationship.💙💛 💔0 -
Pixie5740 said:Retireby40 said:Spendless said:Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.
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Retireby40 said:Pixie5740 said:Retireby40 said:Spendless said:Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.0 -
Pixie5740 said:Retireby40 said:Pixie5740 said:Retireby40 said:Spendless said:Retireby40 said:Siebrie said:I've been hunting for the source, but I cannot find it anymore, sorry. Probably an article in a magazine from either 'Child & Family' (Kind&Gezin) or 'Family Union' (Gezinsbond), where the explanation they gave was that historically, the money went to the Mother, as the Father was likely to use it to celebrate the birth of a(nother) child in the pub. Of course, not all fathers, but enough to persuade government to pay it out to the mother.
There's some pretty poor opinions on this topic and I do think if it was a reversal of roles people wouldn't be saying the same thing.
2 people had a child. 2 people have to pay for all costs relating to the child. It really is that simple. His salary. Her one of grant.
Was that the whole reason behind it? Or was that just used as a stick to beat men with?
Was it designed maybe to give women a compensation for their work in the household and independence? Yes.
2 different things.0
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