Family Woes!

Charlies_Aunt

Not sure if I have posted in the right section. 

My ex husband and his partner have my children to stay 50% of the time. 

I am unhappy about a lot of things that go on while they are there, mainly initiated by his partner, who I don’t get on with at all. 

My children are 10 and 5, for Christmas my ex got them a puppy that lives with him, she has children as well so it’s classed as a family dog. 

Being a puppy it is still at the stage of going to the toilet around the house. Personally I find this unacceptable, however I found out that all the children have to clean up the dogs mess. My daughter, being barely 5 has to do this, which includes poo and wee. 

Am I being unreasonable by thinking that this is not an acceptable thing for children to be doing. 

Your advice would be appreciated.  

TIA

74jax

Charlies_Aunt said:

Not sure if I have posted in the right section. 

My ex husband and his partner have my children to stay 50% of the time. 

I am unhappy about a lot of things that go on while they are there, mainly initiated by his partner, who I don’t get on with at all. 

My children are 10 and 5, for Christmas my ex got them a puppy that lives with him, she has children as well so it’s classed as a family dog. 

Being a puppy it is still at the stage of going to the toilet around the house. Personally I find this unacceptable, however I found out that all the children have to clean up the dogs mess. My daughter, being barely 5 has to do this, which includes poo and wee. 

Am I being unreasonable by thinking that this is not an acceptable thing for children to be doing. 

Your advice would be appreciated.  

TIA

Yes, I think you are being unreasonable.  It's a puppy, sadly thats what a puppy does until it's trained.
If it's a family dog, yes I expect family to much in - warts and all.
I'm guessing the 5 year old is not left alone with the dog in the house, so it will be a case of 'who's turn is it now, ah unlucky it's you, this is what we do'................
You say your ex husband has YOUR children to stay, are they not his? is he a step dad, do they want to keep seeing him?

thorsoak

No, I think it is perfectly acceptable that a  5 year old learns that owning a dog means responsbilities - and as long as she is taught how to do it safely and hygenically - and of course reminded all the time that she has to wash her hands after so doing, that is how my children - and my grandchildren were/are taught - and in fact the 2-year old twins know that before they can play in the garden, we have to do a "poo patrol" - where they go slowly around the garden and shout "poo" when they find one - and do not touch it!    

74jax

thorsoak said:

No, I think it is perfectly acceptable that a  5 year old learns that owning a dog means responsbilities - and as long as she is taught how to do it safely and hygenically - and of course reminded all the time that she has to wash her hands after so doing, that is how my children - and my grandchildren were/are taught - and in fact the 2-year old twins know that before they can play in the garden, we have to do a "poo patrol" - where they go slowly around the garden and shout "poo" when they find one - and do not touch it!    

We have poo patrol here too - though it's for me and hubby to cut the grass or have a BBQ, I love that term.

ZaSa1418

I agree that it is perfectly acceptable for a 5yr old to be taught how to look after a dog, including being taught how to clean up toilet accidents.  Assume they are not being left to their own devices doing it of course.

Charlies_Aunt

Thanks for your answers. Apparently they take in turns each day. My daughter is expected to do it alone. I guess if that’s what counts for them then their house must stink. 

For the record, neither of them like going there as they don’t like his partner, she looks after them for him and they barely see their father as he is working. 

I guess I will have to let it go, it’s amazing what some people find acceptable. 

gizmo111

I am unhappy about a lot of things that go on while they are there, mainly initiated by his partner, who I don’t get on with at all. 
For the record, neither of them like going there as they don’t like his partner, she looks after them for him and they barely see their father as he is working. 
No doubt their reluctance is picked up by your open dislike of their Dad's new partner.

pinkshoes

Charlies_Aunt said:

Thanks for your answers. Apparently they take in turns each day. My daughter is expected to do it alone. I guess if that’s what counts for them then their house must stink. 

For the record, neither of them like going there as they don’t like his partner, she looks after them for him and they barely see their father as he is working. 

I guess I will have to let it go, it’s amazing what some people find acceptable. 

I think it is an example of good parenting.

They are teaching their children that puppies don't just mean the fun stuff, but also doing the yucky stuff too, and teaching them to take responsibility for the total care of an animal. 

Puppies do their business in the house until they are old enough to learn. Thankfully a lot quicker than humans!

I expect my 5 year olds to go on "poo patrol" round the garden and help look after our dogs, although would not expect them to pick up poop on their own. My 10 year old does though. 

74jax

Charlies_Aunt said:

I guess I will have to let it go, it’s amazing what some people find acceptable. 

It's also amazing what some people DON'T find acceptable, showing how to care for a puppy being one.

ZaSa1418

Charlies_Aunt said:

Thanks for your answers. Apparently they take in turns each day. My daughter is expected to do it alone. I guess if that’s what counts for them then their house must stink. 

For the record, neither of them like going there as they don’t like his partner, she looks after them for him and they barely see their father as he is working. 

I guess I will have to let it go, it’s amazing what some people find acceptable. 

Do the other children in the house not do it if it's a family pet? 
Alone as in she picks it up herself and there is no one there to supervise or pick it up alone but someone is watching her / helps her if needed?   
Teaching children about being responsible for pets is a good thing as long as it is done in the right way. 

Charlies_Aunt

How kind of you to say so. Your comments are appreciated.