Friend owes me thousands

sim2335

my friend owes me 6000

And I am in debt because of him

He’s manipulated over a year to get money and use it mainly to gamble

And everytime he sends me some back he always ask for it back either lies or tells truth and will politely haress me hard until I send it all or some back.

When that fails he will use blackmail saying you ain’t getting a penny back etc 

Then he will apologise, and say send 50 and be very nice again.

When I send him money he’s nicest person in world when I don’t he’s the most horrible...but then he aplogises etc and tries to get money again.

Also In past when I sent him every penny..he would help me apply for payday loans and take some from that too gamble 

I have most his texts he has a house with his wife (not sure if I’m his name too) he has a car., payments where made through bank transfer.

So in March he gets a big reducny pay of over 9k not sure how much he will give me if anything as he keeps changing amount

So anyway after March I’m gona block him, report his harrsment blackmail to police(I’ve tried everything nothing works)

Is it worth paying for court to get my money back?, I’m worried it won’t work and even if it does he will seek revenge ir spread false rumours etc 

kazwookie

Do you have any thing in writing over this money?

If not it could be your word against his and it would depend on who the court believed.

I suggest you start saying the word NO, to yourself when he approaches you again, start saying NO to him and mean it, do NOT let him emotionally black mail you.

sim2335

Nothing in writing,all on WhatsApp and bank transfer
I have started saying no, but then he
 evnutlly wears me down...and he
 is very convincing..and lies loads and pays back bits here and there and ask for it back or once I paid my bills what
 ever is left 

sourcrates

An all too familiar story unfortunately, you need to stop this cycle its not healthy at all.

Its time to break off all contact with this person, the price will be the £6000 I'm afraid, I doubt you will see that money again anyway.

Even if you went to court and won, if he doesn't have the money, or he refuses to pay, then you are no further ahead, and it will cost you more money to further enforce the judgement, money you might not get back.

People like this pray on your good nature, in reality, they are just using you as a cash cow, experience tells me you may not be the only one he`s "borrowed" from either, this promise of his redundancy money, I'd say that is just another line to keep you hooked, to make you think you`ll get a payday, don`t be surprised if this turns out to be hot air as well, you need to end this, and move on.

sim2335

Even though it’s tough I’m gona hold out till March not gona hold my breath though.

After court I would not enforce I would just leave it as that.

also in March should I try to scare him in paying me back saying I will use other methods if you don’t by .(I.e tell his wife I have her mobile number, court etc from a screenshot he sent me ages ago but he won’t rember so he will be shocked)........ or most of it, I won’t actually do it.

what if when I tell him I will block him, he says I’m gona tell people this and that etc go to police?, or say I will tell his wife?

should I inform him about police, or just go.

sourcrates

sim2335 said:

Even though it’s tough I’m gona hold out till March not gona hold my breath though.

After court I would not enforce I would just leave it as that.

also in March should I try to scare him in paying me back saying I will use other methods if you don’t by .(I.e tell his wife I have her mobile number, court etc from a screenshot he sent me ages ago but he won’t rember so he will be shocked)........ or most of it, I won’t actually do it.

what if when I tell him I will block him, he says I’m gona tell people this and that etc go to police?, or say I will tell his wife?

should I inform him about police, or just go.

Can I ask how old you are, male or female ?
There's not much point going to court then just leaving it, as for the rest of your post, I think those decisions will have to be made by you.

sim2335

33 male
It’s not gona be as simple as just block him.That’s why I will need to get police involved.

He will start using emotional blackmail, tell people he will tell others my secrect.. say he doesn’t care what I do etc Even once I said I will go to doctor...(too scare him)then he’s like I’m gona block you cos you a danger..then he said he was only messing and couldn’t belive I belived him then starting begging for money again...

If doctor don’t scare him, nothing will 

Never seen this in my life just to gamble try to take every penny anthor human has, and be on their case 24/7 other then when you can’t ie sleep but stay awake...

Surely it can’t just be gambling he must have other mental health problems 

Sea_Shell

What does he have on you?  Would he just be spreading rumours, or does he actually know something that could cause you real trouble?

sim2335

Anything I’m ever going through he’s always there available almost 24:7 just like other people, just so he can get money to gamble.

What he has on me he helped me talk to my crush, and he could tell her when I can’t to her to he was telling me what to say that would be humlitining, plenty of things he could do..he’s real good at getting girls etc 

And he could try damage me because he thinks I’ve damaged him 

I’m not going to court but will send letter before court hoping he lay soemthing

Sea_Shell

Are you a vulnerable adult?

Do you work?  Have your own home?

It doesn't sound like a healthy relationship for a 33 year old to have.

sim2335

no
yes work full time
live with parents 

its not healthy for him or me but he doesn’t realise I do.