Covid is causing a strain on my relationship with my brother

bebex

I’m agreed to move back home during covid whilst I was looking to purchase a house and to help my parents. I’ve always had a really close relationship with my brother who’s 21 but covid is putting a massive strain on the relationship I don’t think it’ll ever recover. The whole way through covid he refused to follow the rules and saying seeing his friends help mental health and he’ll do what he wants. We’re in tier 4 and yet again he’s out partying with his friends and constantly socialising in large groups which is leading to massive arguments between me and him. I’m at the point where I just can’t deal with any longer. He’s criticising me for sitting in and following the rules, saying if I had friends I’d be out doing what I want ( all my friends are professionals in the defence industry and we are aware the consequences of breaking the rules on our careers).
My mum says I can’t tell him how to live his life and takes his side as per usual. She says he’s more sensitive and I’m being unfair. For me the person resolution would be to move out and top speaking. Any advice?

Morrigan_2020

Move back out. 

MovingForwards

Move out.
Not your house to make the rules.

DCFC79

Does he not realise/understand the risks here ?
Where is he partying with others if your in a tier 4 ?
Id also move out if it were me, are you living with your brother hence why its getting to you ?

mattyprice4004

Move out - if anything, this pandemic has shown me that you can't reason with stupid.
So many of the 'its only flu bro' and 'it's all a conspiracy' types have shown themselves from friends I thought were actually quite sane - very disappointing, but here we are.

coffeehound

Socialising is a very strong motivation at that age.  Add to that the fact that cv won't affect him, throw in the fact that he's maybe been a bit over-mothered.  Yup, moving out might be your best plan.

lisyloo

I’m not sure if this is good advice (maybe not) but I’d certainly be considering reporting him. I am questioning the motivation and you’d have to accept the effect of your relationship, but the govt DO make the rules and they can be enforced.

unholyangel

While I'm mindful of the health implications of covid....I think you're being a bit cheeky with regards to your mum. 

You think she's taking his side but surely if she was, she'd be forcing you to go out and mingle. It sounds like your mum's trying to keep everyone happy, by allowing them to do their own thing. Only you're not happy because you don't want them to do their own thing, you want them to do your thing. 

You can't have everything your own way when other people are involved. You can choose for yourself, but not others. 

I do understand where you're coming from but perhaps I'm feeling sympathy for your mum. I also had two conflicting attitudes to deal with from family members and had no control over either one. 

[Deleted User]

About 75% of my family seem to have the same attitude. I’m one of the ones that is following the rules. I don’t live near the ones that choose to not follow, seen none of them since March 2020 and I live alone. 

bebex

MovingForwards said:

Move out.
Not your house to make the rules.

My mum is happy however to take £650 a month for rent off me. I think moving out will be my only option my parents financial situation can be their own problem 

bebex

lisyloo said:

I’m not sure if this is good advice (maybe not) but I’d certainly be considering reporting him. I am questioning the motivation and you’d have to accept the effect of your relationship, but the govt DO make the rules and they can be enforced.

I have been tempted especially when he attended a house party of 30+ people on news year eve and posted it to his Snapchat story but I don’t feel like it’ll go down well if my mum found out.