feeling a bit crap

topsy1973

just on break time and its a wet one...

thanks to all who have sent some moral support....how I have got through this morning I do not know...head is all over the place but hey have managed a year 8 maths lesson and 2 french lessons...just got 2 more to go....

It was interesting that in the proposed DMP they said I could pay of all my debts in approx 2 years 5 months...how do they come to that???

Still working out what to say to my OH tonight...don't know if I can do it tonight! ((

Does your life end on DMP....can you still have a form of social life or is it minimal?

thanks
Sharon
x

taxi73

Hi and welcome..just wanted to send you a big hug ...you have now took the biggest step in facing up to it all...well done..it will get easier...I don't know anything about DMPS but wanted to send you a hug anyway...everything will work out in the end I'm sure..take care xx

chloebelle

Topsy, if your other half loves you he will support you. He may feel shocked and a bit angry but he should support you.

If you wanna tell him the full extent of the debt then be postive and forward thinking about it.

Say Something like: 'I have run up debts of £xx and I know its my fault because I have been stupid. However I've been on the internet all day looking for solutions and I'm determined to sort this out. I know you are probably angry, but I need your support because I love you and don't want money to affect us. Please give me your support and I promise I will get debt free'.

Any other half who cares will help you. Get him to join DFW too and he can share the support and love!!

hypno06

To be rid of your debt in 2 and a half years is fab! A large proportion of this is because interest is generally frozen so you are only paying off the capital, meaning the debts come down quicker, whereas at the moment, you are paying lots of interest and only little capital.

I would make a start with the DMP process, then tell OH that you have taken positive steps to sort it out. Also to show him how much quicker you will be debt free doing it this way, rather than continuing the way you are at the moment.

Good luck, let us know how you get on x

sira_2

Believe me Topsy your life doesn't end when you start on a DMP in fact you get your life back again! You will be in total control of your debt, you will have the help & support of the CCCS to get through the early stages and you are even given a budget for hobbies, a night out etc.. Ok you may not be able to splash out on a fancy meal, brand new clothes and a night clubbing but your priorities change and you come to live with it. If you know you have a night out coming up you cut back on something to compensate for that i.e your shopping budget for the week. Just think in 2 years you can be debt free, have all the worry gone and be able to get back to normality and a bit more wiser for the future. There are many people on here, myself included, who wish there debt was gone in 2 years!! As for telling hubby, well i was in the same position. I felt so guilty because a few years before we were in debt and re-mortgaged to get ourselves out of it, huge mistake, long story but because of the wrong advise & a few bad decisions we're back there again. I blamed myself & took days to pluck up the courage to deal with it. He was sick to the stomach at the thought of us being back there again but, although i've had to deal with all the creditors, paperwork etc., has been totally supportive. We are in the process of selling our house to be debt free and will have to rent for a while. This will be tough but at the end of the day we're not dying, we have each other for support and have 2 fantastic healthy kids, at the end of the day material things are nothing compared to that. You will be ok i promise you, you will get through this. In a months time you will feel so much more positive and know you are finally on your way to being debt free. xx

topsy1973

hi again,

thanks again for advice....have managed to get through the morning somehow...the kids were nice and settled which helped!

I am going to contact the DMP people as soon as I have received this months statements from CC companies...as at present I shred all details in an attempt to hide the reality.

My debt is mainly due to the interest they keep piling on....

Talking about my OH...I know he loves me but we went through this situation a few years ago and he broke down at how much I owed....he has never really had debt...pays everything on time and does not believe in overdrafts....oh to be like him lol!!! We are a real mismatch when it comes to money! One good thing from last time is we got a joint CC in his name and we use that for shopping etc and it has to be paid every month...:A

Well must plough on with some paperwork!

Sharon

loo-loo_2

Hello again, I've just hopped over from my thread. The really good thing about the DMP is that is really does train you to budget - after a while it becomes second nature and you'll become a scrooge like me - haha. Life doesn't stop, but it need to adjust slightly, like the shopping sprees etc. You just have to think that banks are there to make money out of you. I've had to confess to alot of people about my debt and to be honest, they've told me it was a brave thing to do and admire my sticking power. The DMP won't affect your future much - the more willing you are to pay back your debts to the banks, the better it'll look for you - in fact I paid off GE Money last month and they wanted to keep me as a customer and sent me the big Gold card just so that they could hope I'd spend more money!!!!

topsy1973

Hi All!

well I did it...got in from work tonight...was going to chicken out of telling OH...then something came on news about interest rates and I jumped in and spilled....and cried for a while...he was good...took me a while to tell him the extent but he has agreed that the DMP looks the best option and the quickest and hey if it stops the interest that is what is crippling me in the first place!

Also spoken to my mum so feeling a bit better....now waiting on the CC bills to get the exact amounts so I can send my accurated DMP to CCCS...

Hopefully the prediction of 2 years 5 months is close as would also like to start trying for a family (the old biological clock is ticking!) when I am close to or am debt free!

I am just hoping all companies will accept the proposals from CCCS...that is the next worry!

Will keep you up to date with anything else

Sharon

sira_2

Well done, i'm proud of you!! xxx

loo-loo_2

Well done - you're over the worst hurdle. Crying's good - I've cried alot about my debts and thought I'd never see the end of the tunnel, but I'm nearly there now. The proposals should be fine - I had 7 creditors and after a couple of months, they wrote to accept the proposals. Good luck.