HELP!How to convert a money waster? (sry long)

Spendless

donna-j wrote:

I disagreed so strongly because of this. You didn't mention hidden accounts. You said separate accounts were like a pre-nup, which would surely consitute accounts that were known about, not hidden ones.

I suppose my own money in my current account and my savings account is 'hidden' in that my partner has no reason to see my bank statements. He can if he wants, he just doesn't need to.

This is an example of what I regard as 'hidden money'. I have a friend who's been with her husband 19 years, married for 16 with 3 kids.

He gives her housekeeping money each week which she is expected to pay all bills out of. The amount given doesn't cover all the bills plus shopping. She doesn't know what he earns over and above what he gives her weekly. She has a part time job plus her child benefit and tax credit money.

She has run up a £10,000 cc debt that her husband recently found out about (she didn't tell him), in the meantime he has bought himself an £8,000 motorbike.

I don't earn so husbands money has to be 'our' money. We do have both joint and seperate accounts. That's because I prefer to have different accounts for different things eg holidays, and it makes more sense to have savings in my name as I'm a non-taxpayer. I don't see the money is 'his' and 'mine' though it's joint money just earmarked for different things.

jellyhead

how can she claim tax credits without knowing what his income is? that's a wierd setup they have. my aunt was like that, her ex husband used to give her a small amount to live on each week, if they had a coupon put through the door (for pampers etc.) he would deduct it from her housekeeping. i thought he was being really mean but when they split up we all realised he kept her short of money so there was none spare for alcohol.

Spendless

jellyhead wrote:

how can she claim tax credits without knowing what his income is?

Hmmm. Good question! I've been thinking and I don't know, unless she doesn't claim them -but I thought she told me she did. He could have filled out forms but the award in both names would still come thru door. Even if she didn't open his post hers would have same info. Hmmm

jellyhead

maybe anything with 'inland revenue' on the envelope is put aside for him to deal with, even those with her name on?

Spendless

jellyhead wrote:

maybe anything with 'inland revenue' on the envelope is put aside for him to deal with, even those with her name on?

hmm possibly,but this has set me off thinking where does the surplus cash go -it must go into a bank account- so where does that statement go? Her housekeeping money goes into her bank account, so that must come from somewhere? So is it a case that she doesn't know or more she could find out but can't be bothered too?

donna-j_2

We know exactly what each other earns. Our bank statements and payslips are kept in a file box, we just don't need to scrutinise them.

The money is in these separate accounts for different 'jobs'. Our joint account is for all the household stuff, our joint savings is for our baby stuff once s/he makes an appearance, our separate savings are ISAs and you can't have joint ISAs and our separate current accounts are what is left over and for us to spend on what we want. I buy things, OH doesn't, so it wouldn't be fair on him to pull all resources, and it wouldn't be fair on me to feel guilty every time I buy something for myself out of my hard-earned cash.

bargainqueen_2

Lol, Jelly I am not begrudging OH a playstation Game a month. He used to have heaps of Spending money and still go over it (in the UK. He got about 300 pounds a month pure spending) I am not sure how much spending money he has now as with the move to Oz the finances need re-jiggling. We are also currently living of his wage alone as I am still working for my employer in the UK and being paid in my UK bank account which I want to keep until my contract ends and then transfer the full sum over. So I would estimate between the two of us we now have about 200 pounds spending money per month. Which in Oz dollars buys a lot more, and yet is not enough. And I don't go to the hairdresser (long hair, OH cuts the ends), don't buy clothes (Cupboard overflowing as I only wear Jeans and T-shirts) and don't do a lot of other stuff with really. Oh dear.