In process of being bought out of house by ex, but I'm not sure I want to go down this route anymore

AnotherJoe

Thrugelmir said:

You can , for the time being , simply do nothing.  Let her pay the mortgage in full. While retaining a 50/50 ownership of the property.  Force her hand.  Without your agreement your ex is stymied.  

She is but she could also stop paying the mortgage, OP is still liable and they start chasing him, meanwhile she stays in the house for free. 

OP, here's another person telling you to just make a clean break and if that includes paying the ERC then do it.  Sounds like the house needs to be sold given neither of you two can afford it by yourselves. 

Jeepers_Creepers

Awful situation for you Frewbz.

As said by others, please completely separate the emotional ties, attachments and feelings and look at the situation in a practical and rational manner; the P and R aspects will continue well after the Emo side has become history. (And if there is any part of you that retains some hope of a reconciliation - and that would be natural, if almost certainly misguided - can I make it clear that any 'fudging' of the house issue with emotive or irrational or 'weak' behaviour will only cause resentment and a loss of respect. 

I don't understand the technicalities of the mortgage and other issues, so my advice is based on a simplistic 'what's the best thing to do here'. And that, I believe, is a clean break. 

This house is in Cornwall? At the moment, prices there are going crazy - perhaps not as much as in Devon (I don't know), but around here houses are being snapped up for crazy sums by folk from other parts of the country. (A bungalow a friend was looking at sold before they could make an offer at £326k back in July. That sale fell through and it's back on the market - for £369k, more than they can afford...) So I reckon that (a) your house will probably fetch a premium at the moment, and (b) certainly cannot be guaranteed to do this in 5 years time. No-one can predict what house prices will do over the short term, but the nutty price hikes in this area are surely unsustainable? I think that should focus your mind more towards cashing in now rather than imagining it'll be worth more in 5 years time.

BUT, that's your judgement to make.

If you don't sort the matter now, then - sorry - the chances are extremely high that you will both go through a hellish and emotionally charged time before you get around to trying to sort it later. One or other or both of you will almost certainly have huge changes in your lives over the coming 5 years, and this will almost certainly just serve to muddy and antagonise the issue. 

You have room at your folks where you can stay? Lucky you. Now capitalise on that by becoming a cash buyer in a year's time when prices have almost certainly taken a hit. (Of course, Cornwall might remain immune - that's a gamble). I have very little doubt that I would want out and with my half-share NOW, and then wait until places became affordable again.

What are prices doing RIGHT NOW where the house is? Is it a desirable area? 

Thrugelmir

AnotherJoe said:

Thrugelmir said:

You can , for the time being , simply do nothing.  Let her pay the mortgage in full. While retaining a 50/50 ownership of the property.  Force her hand.  Without your agreement your ex is stymied.  

She is but she could also stop paying the mortgage, OP is still liable and they start chasing him, meanwhile she stays in the house for free. 

If the ex stops paying the mortgage. Then voluntary repossession is an option. Not that I think that it come to that point. As the ex obviously cannot obtain a mortgage in their own right and is desperately trying to think of a way of staying in the property. Holding firm for the time being seems the best option. As there is after all only one solution.