First Steps to Solvency

alt80

@enthusiasticsaver it was thanks. Starting to wonder if you have a point there re simple days still like to be able to get to the countryside in a nice car though. I'm not completely converted yet ha. 

Fml they are going to have their work cut out with a Border Collie - they need entertaining all the time and are too clever; same definitely can't be said for my golden. 

She makes me laugh too, always has. Would be boring to be in a marriage to someone who didn't imo.

ladyholly

I hate to tell you alt but I think your goldie is very clever. He certainly has you and your wife dancing to his tune. I find dogs tend to be as thick as they need to be to get what they want. Ours certainly are. Yes even the border collie who just looks at you when he knows he has pushed too far with eyes that say WHAT? You are right they do make you laugh.

enthusiasticsaver

The border collie is definitely intelligent but excitable and very playful but she is just a puppy. My DD treats her like an unruly toddler though and enforces down time as apparently that breed has lots of energy but the more tired she gets the more excitable particularly with two young children as my DGDs are 3 and 6. She spent a lot of time herding us yesterday on the beach 😂 They are spending a lot of time training her. I always thought retrievers were quite intelligent. Have a nice day. I am doing an 8 mile hike with my walking group today. 

alt80

Day 164

Quiet one although we did have Sunday roast out. Nice enough - £55 spend for the roast dinner and a coffee after. No pudding we couldn't eat one lol. Atmosphere reminded me of my parents' old place a bit, proper old country pub. Going to see the lights this coming weekend and got a few Christmas decs out today, certainly starting to feel like that time of year. We've decided we're going to go in the Range Rover, it's not getting much use at the moment tbh the EQC is brilliant for work and local / localish driving.

Another day off the booze, I'm doing well with that; has crossed my mind it's another thing that's no good for me really. I can get into a pattern of drinking which easily turns into a pattern of drinking too much and feeling awful or going down the path of temptation. I mentioned to my wife I think I want to keep it to special occasions only if that actually planning an AF birthday and Christmas this year. Our son still sings and there is a school Christmas event next month. I've not been to one before always made some excuse up but really want to go this year, son doesn't know; hope to surprise him. Wife has told me there's a surprising amount of booze on offer having been warned in advance I think I'm just going to say no thanks. 100% guaranteed my son's school mate's dad who called me a jumped up estate agent and his wife will be there, their son sings too last thing I need is a drink with him and some of the others there. Glad it's the first time I'll be going tbh had I made the effort before idk what !!!!!! state I'd have been in shameful definitely but also nice to be able to say I can go to this kind of thing now. 

@ladyholly lol my in-laws say the same.

@enthusiasticsaver haha probably be ok if they are that strict on the training. Our golden is and was spoilt tbh. Hope you had a nice walk we've managed 6 miles today making the most of the dry and fine weather.

RelievedSheff

Day 165 today. You have cracked it this time.

Well done.

Your son will love it that you are going to the school Christmas event.
I

maggiem

Very pleased to read you are going to your son's singing concert. My son used to sing in the school choir and I went to a Christmas concert and was thinking someone is flat - yes that was my son! Next concert he was in the back row not front row 😂😂😂.

Congratulations on day 165, amazing. 

poppy811

Just wanted to add my congratulations.

warby68

Well done @alt80. 

Take your tissues for the school concert. Little boys singing melts the toughest.

Just be designated driver for any events with drink you don't want.

You've really got the real life/simple pleasures at the moment - its really nice to see and we know it takes guts to put yourself out there and admit/accept this stuff.

Kakiste

You'll love it! I took the afternoon off to go to my daughter's nativity play when she first started school and it turned out she had a solo (that she hadn't mentioned at all prior to us turning up!) The head stopped the play straight afterwards to tell everyone how well she'd done- honestly it absolutely broke me, I was so proud of her.

alt80

Day 165; thanks all. Know it's been mentioned on here a few times do I need to keep counting the days. I'm not sure I do but I like adding the +1 ha. Not spent any money today and kept to work schedule I'd planned even though I could have stayed I didn't looked at tasks I could pass on which I wouldn't have in days gone by and planned out rest of week. Weekend planned for this week already so nothing to do there.

Thanks all re school. I've never felt able to go before now always avoided everything to do with school had some excuse since his very first year there. Definitely regret it but I can't dwell on that, move on and stay in a better frame of mind. If I'm asked I can just say I'm driving tbf. It's important I do this part of my recovery plan and better for my son to see I care about him. I always have just convinced myself staying away from family was the best thing to do. It was !!!!!! horrible tbh not until I've made the motions to improve both my own life and that of my family's that I see how destructive I was not just to myself but for people I care about a lot been trying to stop the destructive stuff, spending and the rest on and off for a lot of years but not been as successful with it as I am now. Not going to forget though, that's dangerous in itself. I am 100% committed to therapy and these years of payback. Anyone reading this who is struggling with spending or substances I've had more of a life these past 165 days than I have in years being ruled by addiction. There's a whole !!!!!! big wide world beyond no matter what your addiction tells you. Not saying it's easy, it isn't I've white knuckled through some of the past 165 days but 100% been worth it to get to where I am rn. Look back on turning 40 and the weeks leading up this time last year and birthdays previous to that too when it's like the !!!!!! world is ending another year gone / older etc. It's my birthday this week and I just see a weekend to look forward to, still have my family, great business and work family as I like to think of my staff. Very grateful to those on here who've helped along the way. Lot of sense talked and might not have always but I have listened and taken advice on board. Thank you.