First Steps to Solvency

Humdinger1

@alt80 without wanting to be judgemental towards anyone, have you come across the expression that some people need every advantage that money can buy? Not re you, but people like the MG friend, who were handed everything on a plate and are still scr*wing it up, big-time.  You have built everything you have, so who should be admiring who?? And you're kind and want to make the world better.  Huge congrats on seeing the problem and joining NA and continuingwith the counselling.  I've sadly known too many people in thrall to this; you can get out of it and I'm confident that you will. You have so much support and even admiration on here; you're not perfect but who is and it's obvious that you are brave and want to get clean.  Understand re the buzz; I used to be in sales which too often encourages short term buzz vs long term contentment.   Thank God I'm in a different sector now and working with quieter, more thoughtful people.  Not suggesting you should change career but perpetually chasing the buzz is addictive and destructive whether in careers, substances, cars or anything else.   You need a break and getting used to normality where adrenalin rushes aren't always just around the corner is hard at first but in the end, you'll be glad.  Keep going, you can do this.  Humdinger 

getmore4less

Anyway you can get some organic growth in sub parts of your business by getting your people to do it. 
Thinking
Residential letting. 
Residential valuation. 
Residential block management. 

Can you get them chasing new business if they have any free time. 

Keep the commercial for yourself. 

theoretica

alt80 said:

Had a few weekends with family find it really hard to make the move to do it but do actually enjoy it when I bother. It’s weird don’t know why I do everything I can to avoid them tbf.

I have been known to do something similar. In my case it can be because of mild depression and anxiety - and doing things makes me feel much better.  Or I get into a nasty little loop of putting pressure on myself that I should be doing something (eg work) so don't do other things, but get slower, less efficient and generally worse at what I am trying to do because I am putting so much pressure on myself - and end up wasting heaps of time and getting stale.  I get better results having shorter and more focussed periods for what I want to accomplish.  It's why I'm so keen on work/life balance - I know how much I need it for both work and life to go well.

strawb_shortcake

In regards to your relationship with your wife, you have given her plenty of reasons and opportunities  to walk out, especially with having a child, yet  she stays. I think your relationship might be stronger than you think. 

ryanm8655

annabanana82 said:

In regards to your relationship with your wife, you have given her plenty of reasons and opportunities  to walk out, especially with having a child, yet  she stays. I think your relationship might be stronger than you think. 

Agreed, that's not to say you should take it for granted.

warby68

 @alt80 not sure what got bleeped  !!! in your reply to me but no, there was no subtext, honest. Just want you to give dealing with addiction your best shot. Then you can get back to debt and business and longer term plans for both with a clearer head than now.

alt80

@Humdinger1 think you’re talking about the guy I was going to do the JV with. Yeah iswym. Thank you hope I get there too.

@getmore4less that’s kind of where I am going re people. 

Lettings/ management res/ comm - Not too long taken on a new lettings manager with good experience/ contacts (last year). Starting to pay off. Have another member of staff in same dept. All goes as planned and forecast, hoping to add another person by year end.

Sales res/ comm - 1 full time. Young lad who spends 1/2 days here, 1/2 days res vals and 1/2 days comm - he’s doing a degree apprenticeship and comm valuers involved. Mad at the moment, apart from this week (could be a sign things turning a bit idk, others are busy so maybe just a quiet week) but reluctant to take on another member of staff when things seem like a short term boost. 

Res - already involved with. 1 person plus one who crosses res/ comm and me. Some room for expansion and potential for someone else experienced to come on board potentially with wider skill set.

Comm - 3 of us. Me, someone else and someone who crosses res/ comm. I do some res work too but not a lot. Tbh I should get someone else experienced for me to be able to pick and choose what I do.

3x admin

Potential to look at development.

I could work about 1 day a week if I wanted to and upscaled staff a bit but def not for me. Struggle with becoming more of a ‘spare part’ which I know moving away from the fee earning work doesn’t mean that. 

I don’t screw every penny out of main business for my wallet. It’s bought units / projects / comm office which more than pays for itself with the other units let. Comm office leverage has reduced significantly, I draw nothing from that just make inroads into the capital owed. Only thing I have done this with. Potentially interested in further comm investments in the future but needs to be right. 

Projects I could do with being able to put a bit more in to bring the bridging rates down a bit - should be able to do that when this block has gone. Eventually would like to not require PGs, the block has spooked me a bit about having a load of them tbt. Never drawn from projects - put into BTLs. Tbf not done much with projects last few years due to block do it’s all stagnated. 

BTL units x9 I have become fixated on paying back the refinance and getting down to about a 60/65ltv so the PGs can be removed putting it down on ‘paper’ suppose I am paying it back through (hopefully) growth and therefore higher amount of retained iyswim.

Tbt I’ve been reluctant to talk about the business much it’s the only thing I think is positive in my life and have achieved something with. Know others will say not exactly an empire haha etc etc. My head isn’t in the right place to deal with that right now so it would be appreciated if posts aren’t harsh.

@theoretica hear you 100% on all you’ve posted but def struggle to let go of the work for the life ha.

@annabanana82 / @ryanm8655 not really in state of mind to think about it this evening tbt she’s not really speaking to me right now. Get why lol.

@warby68 don’t worry about it, I’ve got a bit of a warped sense of humour if you haven’t already been able to tell. Staying off it is my main priority but not going to do that if it’s all I’m thinking about tbh.  

FootyFanDan

annabanana82 said:

In regards to your relationship with your wife, you have given her plenty of reasons and opportunities  to walk out, especially with having a child, yet  she stays. I think your relationship might be stronger than you think. 

Agree with this, I think had she wanted out or not wanted to be with you then she would have done so by now. While I know you might not always get that buzz from family time it seemed you were a lot more at peace and level headed when you were getting quality time with them. I think your wife will be willing you on much more than any of us mate. Keep going and try see the good you have going off...despite the odd hiccup. 

alt80

@FootyFanDan I wouldn’t put up with me mate lol know that much but yeah she has so far. 

I was getting in a better mindset with it and using the stuff less tbh. Less I bother with that more I bother with the family time but it’s the first thing to go. Not something I’m proud of tbh.

Been trying to tell myself there are positives in my life. Often feel like there are none but I think there are just need to find right mindset.

the_end_of_the_rainbow

alt80 said:

No not looking to add another commitment need to work on getting my head together, building on what I have and debts gone. Got enough on with the counselling ‘homework’. 😆

@theoretica fair point tbh. Know I need to get a bit of a work/life thing going on. I get to weekend and if I don’t work I’m straight on the chang, no point in trying to cover it up anymore ha. Had a few weekends with family find it really hard to make the move to do it but do actually enjoy it when I bother. It’s weird don’t know why I do everything I can to avoid them tbf.

Agree you don’t need the pressure of doing a MBA right now but you do need something else that you can get your teeth into in the evenings / weekend that focuses your mind on something other than debts / drugs / cars / units . Maybe something you can also involve your son / wife in. I will throw a couple of suggestions in here to start the ball rolling (please try hard not to roll your eyes too much!):

plan / build a model railway
500 / 1000 piece jigsaws
write a blog
open university courses
online gaming (though this may not suit your personality!)
photography 
build a kit car