First Steps to Solvency

alt80

Thinking if I plan food and can predict fuel spends - know what my whereabouts are and can plan what we’re doing weekends. Stick with it and will 100 know what the variable is make the most of lockdown and leave the Starbucks etc alone for the month. Gonna smash this. Wife thinks it’s my latest ‘obsession’ haha off the chang on the debts. Get it !!!!!! off.

I’ve been blaming wife for years about how this household runs. Tbh just think she’s not got a clue not really her fault. Realised I need to manage it, quit the excuses. Told her to plan food for next quarter - meals and ingredients list. Put it into basket, transfer to spreadsheet and then know where we are with food spends 100%. She knows I want her to get it to £400/m and have set her a week to do it. Can have a look over weekend and see what I think. @ryanm8655 your staffing issue made me think I’ve actually got my own resources not being put to their best use lol. Need to come to terms that my income is what it is next few years, get this household running like a machine and !!!!!! these debts off. Will have a think on other stuff I can do to start running the whole operation a bit more efficiently.

Going to run some numbers over lunch pay mins on cards and sort o/d.

Re cars hard for me to let go tbh. Don’t want some ‘tool’ for wife only that just seems weird for me anyway. Would be nice for me to have a second car, always had one. Wife’s car by the week mine at the weekend win win. Some of it is selfish tbh almost feel I need to get rid before I start overthinking and buy something stupid but wife thinks I can’t make a sound decision right now haha. Hear the elec mini through work suggestion just don’t know if I want it on my drive and tbh I don’t think wife is going to love it when she drives it either - I reckon she’ll miss the 440. Feel I will right now tbh haha but need to make financially sound choices wife thinks I give it up I’ll be back on the chang. Shes not got a lot of faith in my willpower lol. 

I’m not planning to get a ticket for drug driving lol. Hear you but not in my plans. Wife putting her foot down doesn’t bother me, tbh she’s a decent driver I trust her behind the wheel more than she trusts me. Bit of hard acceleration doesn’t really harm anyone IMO. 

getmore4less

Took a night off so won't quote post just pick up on a few points.
Never really considered it having much of a financial impact
been here before, you can't sort out your finances if you don't know where it is going you can't make judgements or prioritisee without the full picture, like the ftype this is another one that needs that retrospective review.
You hit the nail on the head when you say you are thinking about your spends more when in sensible state,  it is clear that a lot of your deviations have been under the influence not thought through and then ignored 
.
Now even when you do have a weak moment and do something stupid you are trying to fix them.
I think it may help to do that analysis so you have that priority in your head(units&AM before getting wasted)

Funnily enough bloke I used to work for well into his fifties now and by all accounts now destroying a business
Anything you can pick up if your line of work, jobs or decent staff?

 JV mate he’s got a much bigger habit than I’ve ever had. Not that that’s an excuse he’s not the only mate I know who does it tbh most of the mates I have left like a sniff to varying extents.
This is quite telling,  it happens to a lot people they migrate to those that support the habits and drop those that don't.
it does not happen overnight and cannot be undone overnight, review how often these people are a trigger into use and why you need them in your life.
I do it, I have acquaintances that I only hang out with because they are into the beer nothing else in common.
Since lockdown don't even use message with them.

Do you have "school" friends?  nearly all the people I know with kids have at least one other couple with kids that they hang out with. 

Appreciate a lot on here will say to put the ‘savings’ for holidays/ emergency fund/ car insurances etc etc into separate accounts. I just don’t see the point in paying interest for longer than I need to tbh.

If you are going to borrow the money from your pots you need another debt line to track how much you owe these budgeted items or just accept the targets are going to be smaller.

BMW
Your wife has a point here if it is jumbling your head, definitely one to discuss together within hte joint goals.
I will say what I think but ultimately this is one for you sort out together
The wife never wanted it and you are not that keen on it.
The cost of keeping does not fit in with the current budget.
You need 2 cars,  maybe temp period with one until lockdown is over.
You  don't need fast cars and really should not want one until you have given up the stuff you do stupid things when on it.
Workout a sensible car through the business that frees up the current BMW money and does not reduce current income.
You could look at a shorter lease(say 2years) to try it out, I would go longer/cheaper
You won't like this but I would also look to use it for some business miles to reduce the subsidy using the RR.
Finally the wife get to pick the car this time..

Business you need to get on top of this while in lockdown WFH and make sure that nothing is falling through the gaps,  regular meetings needed,  one2one and group to maintain the productivity and growth.
Try to build on this mini boom to make it sustainable coming out the other side.

Hanging out with smarter people can drag you with them, hanging out with people because they are richer does not work the same way unless they are also smarter, not seeing that with some of your mates..

getmore4less

The household stuff is more than just food you need to look at where the money has been going before you can work out what you can cut out.
review a few months of what actually gets bought.

as said before the waste is a easy win you should have 3-4months data for that now.

ladyholly

I don't think anyone plans on getting caught for speeding but face it sometimes s*** happens. 

theoretica

Definitely better to make the right decision and take a bit more time about it.  And maybe during lockdown is a poor time to change car as you would want to test drive.

What would the cheapest cars be that you quite like? (new and 2nd hand).  Would any of these be at all practical for either of you during the week?  Possibly something a bit older and underrated by other people, maybe a bit quirky.

efes_shareholder

I put in my diary that I was caught up in a standstill last night on a fast moving road in my local area where sadly a young man in his 20's died and another driver is seriously injured in hospital
I've just read the police appeal and the driver was a man in his 40's , driving an Aston Martin , I think I remember seeing him fly past me although I don't have a dash cam so could be wrong.
 The driver of the AM has since been charged with causing death by dangerous driving whilst under the influence of alcohol and drugs.
Sorry but you instantly sprung to my mind , how easy with your aspirations and your long standing use issue could this driver be you ?? Its food for thought certainly 

getmore4less

alt80 said:

Thinking if I plan food and can predict fuel spends - know what my whereabouts are and can plan what we’re doing weekends. Stick with it and will 100 know what the variable is make the most of lockdown and leave the Starbucks etc alone for the month. Gonna smash this. Wife thinks it’s my latest ‘obsession’ haha off the chang on the debts. Get it !!!!!! off.

edit to fix the formatting.....
The wife has a point here, there are cycles that tie in with the need to be fixing the problems instant fixes and gratification.
 Problem is when you can't see another fix you go down and end up on the spiral, once the household budget is sorted what's next?
 All the financials are ultimately longer term there are some instant fixes like the selling stuff and maybe the odd one like finding say £100pm from the food or the dropping of a contract but the real results are longer term.

 Even projects there is the buzz at the start and the buzz at the end but weeks/months between those. ( I wonder if there is a subconscious by stuff on the stuff as you then get the buzz undoing the mess)

 Not going to be easy but you will have to learn to accept the longer term and have gaps where nothing changes for a while because there is nothing to be done, the plan is good.

When you get to these points you need to look for good distractions like, find something to do on existing projects, family stuff, work, cooking, wash your own car....

The weekends that have been set aside for family have been a trigger so maybe some work options are needed to help, would the hall project be a good filler, where all the planning for that is dedicated to weekend and only the things that have to be done with others during the week?

 As said before you don't want to be getting into catch up at the weekend, keep it for planning to free up time in the following weeks to make money.

 The big challenge is how to scale up, loads of planning work to do there to keep you busy. No quick fix for that like a dodgy JV.

 (why can't I make a point in a few words?)

alt80

@getmore4less Must admit it’s opened my eyes re how much I spend on the stuff mate. Absolute waste of money tbh and hoping it will be a bit of a motivator to stay off it tbt.

Re bloke I used to work for I’ve already picked up one of his staff at end of last year. Was in the running for a big commercial job but another firm got it. Tbh I hope he pulls himself out of it and gets his !!!!!! together, he’s a decent bloke just gone mad (got divorced) but not going to let new business go for his sake haha.

Yeah something I’ve been thinking about for the counselling re people I mix with. Some don’t need at all tbh others I do. One of the nice things about lockdown can’t go out and meet up tbh going to be a lot harder when everywhere open.

My wife’s got school friends, meets for coffee etc. Have been for a few meals with them in the past when son was in nursery/ reception year. Kind of lost favour with them about 2 years back on a night out in town, nice meal and on for a few drinks type affair. As we’d gone into town I thought some of them would be interested in a bit more than a drink. Completely misjudged it and they made it very clear not something they do. Shouldn’t have bothered when I realised they weren’t interested tbh but I did it anyway. Yeah I know. Basically they now think I’m a massive cokehead and we stopped getting invited to social events immediately after that. 100 my wife hasn’t fully forgiven me for that tbh.

‘Pots’ done that with the Christmas spends. Going to have to with the rest of the o/d. Was meant to be spending my lunch working it out but got caught up in business. Will have to do tonight can’t face another spreadsheet for a couple of hours haha.

BMW: I hear you re. points on that. Wife probably right it’s jumbling my head lol. I’m actually using the BMW a lot at the moment probably 75/25 in BMWs favour. I’m ok with doing that keeps the mileage off the RR but needs to be for right car tbh.

Business: lockdown def still odd. 100 hear you re nothing falling through gaps, 10x more difficult than before imo. Miss the office buzzing/ proper face to face meetings etc. Teams 100 not the same but only way right now. No boom on the comm side mate but def on the res have set a member of staff on task re really growing res side inc lettings/ management which wasn’t something I was massively focused on from a business POV before, brings more in win win. Also had them dealing with my BTLs, let go a little bit nothing fell apart yet no real issues.

Smarter people: ha yeah think that’s what I need. Def know a few who fall into richer but not smarter lol.

Household stuff: I have looked at where money has been going on food also coffee lol. Don’t believe we’re going to be the sort to take a flask out but 100% don’t need that many Starbucks in a month haha. Genuinely think she can do the food for £400/m based on previous spends and not just plucking a figure out of the air. Will see what she comes up with. No alcohol for coming month. My spending on booze has been a bit erratic over past few months tbh think we need to set a budget and stick with it after this month. Not going to become a teetotal.

If you’re suggesting budget for other stuff in that post I am really wanting to give it up but hear you if I’m doing it, it needs accounting for idk have to think on that one. 

Instant fix / spiral: not thought of it like that mate but yeah I do need a buzz in life generally tbh just how I am, get bored otherwise.

@ladyholly / @efes_shareholder you’re probably not going to believe me if I tell you I don’t drive high but anyway that’s awful re AM dude. Life changing for all but really sad re the people he’s harmed. I’ve been there with wrong state of mind for a drive. Forced myself not to go out fair few times tbh.

@theoretica I was just planning to hand back deal with a potential replacement after lockdown tbh.

Re types of car: new car, I’m not interested in anything cheaper than the BMW. Wouldn’t mind a C63 AMG but would settle for the C43. Could really fancy one of those actually but not realistic with finances I know. Older cars - XJS with the V12 100%. I’d potentially buy the MG off my mate tbh. Only really like RWD 2 door coupes and Range Rovers so am somewhat limited on suitable cars.

efes_shareholder

The accident was the horrendous but one of my friends did say I quote " idiots racing on the finance prestige cars" so as much as its seen as an arrival when getting one , you are still judged as being over financed regardless 

alt80

Passed my ‘rona test. 🥂

@efes_shareholder mate if I’ve got an AM I couldn’t care if people think it’s on the chucky tbh ha.