Lockdown breakup - Any chance of getting back together?

ElephantBoy57

benbay001 said:

Roll on the week before last and she flew back to Spain to complete a 1 year masters degree. (planned for a very long time)

It dawned on me when i got back from dropping her off, that she had packed all her stuff, hadnt wanted to go to bed to talk on the last week and refused to book flights to see each other.

I got back together with my GF after a gap of 4/5 years. She would message me, on and off and I never stopped liking her. I thought we were suited all along. I asked her out, she talked to her mother, her mother told her to go out. We still have a long way to go, but I still think it can work, if she wants it to.

In your situation, you can still communicate, it would need to have been a good relationship, in order for a long-distance relationship to work. I don't think it was that good.

AskAsk

onwards&upwards said:

benbay001 said:

AskAsk said:

onwards&upwards said:

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

and now the OP wonders why she has decided to end the relationship??

i don't think the OP is thinking straight.  one minute he tells her to fly away and don't come back, then the next minute he is puzzled why she has done exactly this??

Really? 
I asked a girl, who was 23 and was in a country she had only lived in for 5 months, to travel back to be with her family, to whom she has only ever lived with and is as close to as anyone i have ever met, so she could be around her family, with more space and in an environment that was familiar. 
I asked for her sake, as i could see she was struggling like mad with a virus that the news was reporting was devastating her home country.
I didnt want her to leave, but i thought it was for the best.
I know full well, i would have found lock down a darn sight harder if i had spend 3-4 months completely on my own.

What she heard:

"I want you to leave, I know that will mean you losing your job but I don't care, I would rather that happen than me have to spend lockdown with you.  Also I don't care that you'd be going somewhere that seems more dangerous and where the healthcare system is really struggling to cope and people are dying in huge numbers."

and not forgetting that
"I am fine with you never coming back as there are no flights back" 

to be honest OP.  if you really wanted to be with her, you wouldn't be encouraging her to sod back to spain.  you would want her to stay and say whatever is needed to keep her with you, particularly during the lockdown when you would be feeling lonely and needed support.

if she wanted to go back, then she would be saying it first rather than you ASK her to do so.