Lockdown breakup - Any chance of getting back together?

onwards&upwards

AskAsk said:

benbay001 said:

Search the text in my original post and youre bound to find it. I posted it originally on Pistonheads.

i am only interested in the toilet paper event.  briefly in so many words, what happened OP?

Its disappointing:

"Back when we had the run on the toilet roll in the supermarkets, we had a bust up because i didnt want to run out and pick some up. Yes, we were running out, but we still had a day or two left.

We argued and her parents were also messaging her telling her how she needs to go and get some toilet roll. It all ended up in a bit of a breakdown. She jumped up and down like a toddler and eventually curled up into a ball on the floor in floods of tears."

onwards&upwards

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

MalMonroe

Reading through your initial post it seems to be that, sorry to say, you seem very self-centred. It's all about you, and what annoys you and how you have coped or haven't coped and how you feel. There are two people in every partnership, I think your 'ex' has done the right thing.

Your 'ex', if she can actually be called that, has made a very wise decision and she's gone for good, she isn't coming back. As a woman myself, I can assure you of that. The fact that coronavirus is still with us means that you aren't able to get out and about as you possibly used to do so you are focusing on this relationship, which has now ended.

It's easy for others to say pick yourself up and get on with things but I know it's difficult. I really do hope that you've learned from this experience, you need to try to put others' feelings before yours sometimes. Give and take. 

She isn't coming back. Allow yourself some time to grieve the loss of your brief fling. You will get over it. And she already has.

AskAsk

onwards&upwards said:

AskAsk said:

benbay001 said:

Search the text in my original post and youre bound to find it. I posted it originally on Pistonheads.

i am only interested in the toilet paper event.  briefly in so many words, what happened OP?

Its disappointing:

"Back when we had the run on the toilet roll in the supermarkets, we had a bust up because i didnt want to run out and pick some up. Yes, we were running out, but we still had a day or two left.

We argued and her parents were also messaging her telling her how she needs to go and get some toilet roll. It all ended up in a bit of a breakdown. She jumped up and down like a toddler and eventually curled up into a ball on the floor in floods of tears."

lol.  that made me laugh and brings back bad memories about the toilet paper panic.  those were crazy times.  i am going to be forever paranoid about having enough toilet paper for the rest of my life now.

sounds like the OP is too laid back and doesn't seem to worry that there was a panic out there for toilet paper, while his GF was getting worried like everyone else.  but then i don't understand why she didn't go out and buy the toilet paper herself if he doesn't want to buy it.

AskAsk

onwards&upwards said:

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

and now the OP wonders why she has decided to end the relationship??

i don't think the OP is thinking straight.  one minute he tells her to fly away and don't come back, then the next minute he is puzzled why she has done exactly this??

Pollycat

TBH, I lost interest when it became clear the OP had posted a version of events elsewhere and this was just the abridged version.

onwards&upwards

Pollycat said:

TBH, I lost interest when it became clear the OP had posted a version of events elsewhere and this was just the abridged version.

He posted the same version there, the other stuff just came out in conversation as it went in a different direction.  

Although it is a bit of an unpleasant woman bashing environment on that thread. 

benbay001

AskAsk said:

onwards&upwards said:

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

and now the OP wonders why she has decided to end the relationship??

i don't think the OP is thinking straight.  one minute he tells her to fly away and don't come back, then the next minute he is puzzled why she has done exactly this??

Really? 
I asked a girl, who was 23 and was in a country she had only lived in for 5 months, to travel back to be with her family, to whom she has only ever lived with and is as close to as anyone i have ever met, so she could be around her family, with more space and in an environment that was familiar. 
I asked for her sake, as i could see she was struggling like mad with a virus that the news was reporting was devastating her home country.
I didnt want her to leave, but i thought it was for the best.
I know full well, i would have found lock down a darn sight harder if i had spend 3-4 months completely on my own.

AskAsk

benbay001 said:

AskAsk said:

onwards&upwards said:

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

and now the OP wonders why she has decided to end the relationship??

i don't think the OP is thinking straight.  one minute he tells her to fly away and don't come back, then the next minute he is puzzled why she has done exactly this??

Really? 
I asked a girl, who was 23 and was in a country she had only lived in for 5 months, to travel back to be with her family, to whom she has only ever lived with and is as close to as anyone i have ever met, so she could be around her family, with more space and in an environment that was familiar. 
I asked for her sake, as i could see she was struggling like mad with a virus that the news was reporting was devastating her home country.
I didnt want her to leave, but i thought it was for the best.
I know full well, i would have found lock down a darn sight harder if i had spend 3-4 months completely on my own.

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

i read that quote as you wanted her to go home, knowing that she won't be able to come back and that she would have to leave her job.  she probably read it the same.

if you had said, that you told her that you would be OK if she felt she would prefer to return to spain even though you would miss her, but if that is what she wants and that is what would make her happy then you would respect her decision.  although if she asked you, you would prefer that she stays, and that you think it would be safer for her to stay in the UK.

that is not what your quote said though.

onwards&upwards

benbay001 said:

AskAsk said:

onwards&upwards said:

This is more telling: 

"I did ask her to go back to Spain to spend CV19 with her family on a repatriation flight, but that would have meant there was no way back, and she could have been called into work at any point."

and now the OP wonders why she has decided to end the relationship??

i don't think the OP is thinking straight.  one minute he tells her to fly away and don't come back, then the next minute he is puzzled why she has done exactly this??

Really? 
I asked a girl, who was 23 and was in a country she had only lived in for 5 months, to travel back to be with her family, to whom she has only ever lived with and is as close to as anyone i have ever met, so she could be around her family, with more space and in an environment that was familiar. 
I asked for her sake, as i could see she was struggling like mad with a virus that the news was reporting was devastating her home country.
I didnt want her to leave, but i thought it was for the best.
I know full well, i would have found lock down a darn sight harder if i had spend 3-4 months completely on my own.

What she heard:

"I want you to leave, I know that will mean you losing your job but I don't care, I would rather that happen than me have to spend lockdown with you.  Also I don't care that you'd be going somewhere that seems more dangerous and where the healthcare system is really struggling to cope and people are dying in huge numbers."