FtbDreaming wants to clear £69,700 before Im 40 (2027)

FtbDreaming

Yeah I was thinking that. I’m nearing £1000 in the bank right now so that will pay bills for a good few weeks. If I waste any on Overpaying then I may regret it if I start falling behind on the bills. 

When I cancelled the direct debit for breakdown cover the other week they called me and asked why I cancelled. I said I couldn’t afford it so they’ve kept it going with a 3 month payment holiday till February so that’s good as I would have been stressed if I ever get to go visit my family in Leicester between now and then. 

Ive decorated my kitchen for Halloween. Usually I would buy a load of bits but this year I’ve made do with what’s in the loft and done a not too bad display. I haven’t decorated outside as I don’t agree with trick or treating this year. If there’s old people been isolating for months they’ll be terrified with loads of kids knocking on their door. I’ll just put some songs and disco lights on in the house for the kids and ignore the door hence decorating the kitchen lol. 

Ive had a relaxing day today. My anxiety seems to be settling although still keep having little palpitation episodes. Gonna go to bed soon and find a new series to watch. 

MovingForwards

That was good of the breakdown company. Hopefully things will be better before then and you can get that sorted out again.

The kids will understand and adapt, it's been a different kind of world for a while now. 

It takes a while for anxiety to fully settle, keep following the hints and tips for dealing with it as that will help x

FtbDreaming

Hello diary. I made a small OP at the start of the month of £23 to round the balance down to £68,500.. I don’t wanna fall off the OP bandwagon altogether. That makes my LTV 83.5% and I did calculate the Overpayments so far have taken 6 months off the mortgage. 

I got another sick note today until the 4th December. Work have taken to completely blanking me now so I’ve given up trying. Just waiting it out. I hope I get SSP this week. The payslip usually goes online about 3pm but there’s nothing there. 

On the whole I’m doing better mentally than I was at the start but I am having a bad evening. I took dd1 to town for her bday presents as it’s her bday Friday but obviously everywhere is gonna be closed so thought we might as well do it today. She had £100 which was off DP then I’ve bought a few rubbish presents. Ive got back home feeling really inferior and like a rubbish mum, we went to primark and quite a few other places but the prices were through the roof. I feel so bad that I’ve got her everything off sale rails and don’t get her any of the decent stuff her peers have. Tbf she happy and grateful, it’s all in my head because I’m feeling like a failure at the minute. 

Fingers crossed something is resolved by December because I can’t cope with the money situation for much longer. I’m losing my sense of self worth

MovingForwards

The mortgage is coming down. Even if you pay a few pennies to round it, that's still positive and keeping the momentum going.

Please have another look at your CV and get it out to other places. Boost your own confidence and then you won't focus so much on what work are doing. 

You are not a failure, there's a roof over everyone's head, food in the bellies and the presents are a bonus.

FtbDreaming

Thanks I will try and get back on the wagon with looking for work. I think I’ll update my nurse cv and do a retail one too as that’s what I done pre nursing and a xmas temp job maybe enough to distract me for a title bit. 

The kids were off last week for half term and I have one child off isolating this week due to a covid at school so not really had a minute to myself hence me feeling even more stressed. 

Ive had £60 amazon voucher off my life insurance so used that to tackle a bit of the kids xmas lists. This is the worst time of year for me to be skint. I usually take it easy through May- August and then work 3 or 4 nights a week September to December as I have 3 kids birthdays and Christmas all at the same time. At least lockdown has stopped me having to do a party or take a gang of their friends out this year! 

Thank for the support. Xx

MovingForwards

Think of it like looking for a bargain, the best price, rather that putting extra pressure on yourself. Get a feel for what's around, prepare a few template letters for ease of altering as appropriate. If a potential bargain pops up while looking, apply for it. If one doesn't, keep looking.

Create a generic CV which covers your transferrable skills, rather than one for career and one for retail. Allows you to apply for something office based and general temp work.

Maybe 5 minutes a day, 5 words, 5 lines. Any time spent is a distraction for you, as is keeping up with reading and learning while the other thing resolves itself.

Perhaps try and change the thought process about Christmas. Use the current climate and recently buying the house as a reason for not doing everything like you usually would, scale it back and do gifts of love and hugs, with a few small things to open.
Socks pinned up with little things in to nibble on, buy a tub of chocolates and other wrapped things. (This was always my favourite part)

Family games, family dinner and all being together creates a memorable holiday season.

You want to give the kids the world, but it's not always available. The kids will not want you spending loads, being unhappy and stressed about funding it.

You will get through this x

FtbDreaming

Cv and job hunting is deffo a job for next week. I have got my head out my backside and chased up things for work so that has made me feel a bit better. 

Today is dd1 12th birthday! Its been quite nice in lockdown! No running around or friends to entertain. We usually go to a dessert bar and spend £40-60 on the kids birthdays. Today I went the supermarket and got all the waffles and cream and goodies, wine and bday cake as well as my normal weeks food shop for £61 so deffo a winner! And I usually spend about £20 on balloons and banners. I got a good display that is better than my usual for £4 from the pound shop so I’m made up with them! 

I’m getting my hopes up for being back in work pre christmas. If I’m not then I’ll manage anyway cus that’s what I do. Ive got a new sick note until the 4th dec. 

I love Christmas for all the traditions you mentioned MF and moneys never big on my agenda- the kids don’t expect that much. I think it was just being in town seeing everyone else with bags of goodies made me feel inferior but I have 3 kids a mortgage and no debt- better than a pile of makeup brushes and electronics and a credit card bill as long as my arm! Now that would be stress. 

MovingForwards

Sounds like a wonderful day for DD1 and she probably enjoyed it a lot more.
No need to feel inferior, look at everything you have done over the years for the family. Happy memories are free and last a lifetime x

FtbDreaming

Hello again! Still no progress on my work front although I’ve done everything I can from my end. I’m just waiting on replies now. 

I’ve had a bit of a gamble today and paid £55 for DP medical so he can apply for his hgv licence. I am skint but you don’t get anything out of life without putting some in. He has been a stay at home dad for 10 years but now I think it should be my turn for a bit and the kids are in full time school now so no reason both of us can’t work a bit each to take the pressure off each other. 

Even though I don’t have the money to overpay right now I’ve still been playing with the numbers and if I overpay £360 a month and the odd bit extra now and again I will be able to pay the mortgage in 7 years still. As soon as one of us is working that will be easily achievable. The loft/ diy/ Other plans are on the back burner until we’re comfortable. The house is fine as it is tbh I just wanted it to be better than fine. 

I just hope the news of this vaccine is the end of a horrific year. Everything has gone wrong for everyone I know and not necessarily covid related it’s just like the forces have been working against us all for 2020! X

MovingForwards

Nothing stopping you both working opposing shifts, DP days and you a few nights.

I still think you should cut your O/Ps down, do a token amount just to round it up a little. It's not forever, you carry on saving them when everything is settled make a big O/P or use the money for more work on the house, keeping some back as an emergency fund.

Do keep applying for other positions, as that will keep your hand in. Even if you can do some shifts via an agency, it all helps with the other thing.

Apologies for not posting sooner, I didn't see a notification you had updated your diary x