Advice Wanted........please

a.n.other_4

I feel like i have been away from these forums for too long (i normally use a different username but don't want to use it on this occasion).
So much rotten stuff has been happening

A couple of weeks ago my wife suffered an ectopic pregnancy at seven weeks. Just over a year ago she suffered a mis-miscarriage also at seven weeks. Sadly as part of the op for the ectopic they had to remove one of her tubes. It breaks my heart to have seen my wife go though this. We were so sure it would be ok this time.

How common is it to have an ectopic pregnancy?
How likely is it that next time it will be a mis-miscarriage or another ectopic?

Any help or advice would be very much appreciated.

I'm off to have a good cry

MonkeyGirl

Sorry I don't have any advice I just wanted to offer you and your wife my hugs and prayers and hope things become easier for you in the future. *hugs*

Jay-Jay_4

Oh you poor thing.

Unfortunately m/cs are fairly common and ectopics are less common but still happen to lots of people.

It's quite normal to conceive naturally without a tube so try not to worry about that. What I would suggest is that the next time your wife conceives, go down for a scan straight away to make sure that everything's as it should be.

It's a horrid time for your wife but she'll really appreciate your love and support to get her through it all. Unfortunately, you need to be the strong one so come on here for a virtual hug from us then go back and be a rock for your wife.

I wish you much luck x x x

a.n.other_4

Thanks to you both its really appreciated

I am doing the best i can to be a rock for my wife. I think she is amazing the way she's dealing with it all. At least her physical wounds are healing well, it's going to take some time for the emotional ones.

Jay-Jay_4

Going through the whole conception/miscarriage thing is truly horrible if it's not working. It can really take over your life but hopefully it won't last for long and sooner or later you'll have a succesful pregnancy and be able to put all this hurt and pain behind you x

Becles

Send her *big hugs* from me. I've had an early miscarriage and it's a terrible thing to have to go through. There is light at the end of the tunnel and she will get through it, but she will need some time to deal with it.

A lady I met at ante-natal had all sorts of 'womens problems'. They'd had a few unsuccessful attempts at IVF and nothing happened. They saved up again, and decided this was their last attempt. At the last minute she got cold feet, said she couldn't go through the treatment again, so they blew the money on a cruise instead. When she came back, she found out she was pregnant!

Maybe in time, you could book somewhere really nice and take her away for some relaxing and who knows what could happen

Pinky9

I really feel for you and your wife, I had an ivf miscarriage at 8 weeks and felt that after all the build up and then the subsequent pregnancy I was almost home and dry - saw the heartbeat and everything was fine and then a week later it was over. I am too old now to have any more children so it was not meant to be for me.

For you both, the future really is bright. Many women lose a tube and still manage to concieve normally and have a beautiful outcome. It may seem as though things look really bleak, and indeed trying again with the possibility of more heartache is probably not too appealing right now - but things will get less painful.

Good luck to you both, and big hugs, and well done you for being such a supportive husband - we women need more men like you!

Pinky xx

jenpoptab

Best of luck for the future.

The bounty & bbc websites are very good sources of information usually, it may be worth a look.

Best wishes.

Mumstheword

hugs to you both, and best wishes for a happy future
Mumxx

eml_3

Sorry to hear about what you are both going through. I know 2 people who have had miscarriages and ectopic pregnancies and both of them lost fallopian tubes. However, one now has 2 children and the other has just had her first baby. So there is no reason why you won't go on to have successful pregnancies.

Try this site
https://www.ectopic.org

take care

Plasticman

Don't forget that your doctor may be able to offer you some good advice and guidance for the future. They should be able to answer the two questions in your original post.

Also, you may not want to admit to your wife how bad you feel but talk to people here & talk to your friends and family. Don't bottle things up.

Take care.