SLLM (Single Lady Large Mortgage)

lantanna

You to Sistergold, I’m off to Manchester tomorrow for a solo break until the New Year. Welcome Secondstar

Sistergold

lantanna said:

You to Sistergold, I’m off to Manchester tomorrow for a solo break until the New Year. Welcome Secondstar

Hope you enjoy you doll break! 🌺

Sistergold

SecondStar said:

I’m hoping to be able to join this thread in earnest soon!

My ex and I broke up last week, and we own a house together as joint tenants. I’ve moved out for now, but we’re sitting down on Tuesday to discuss finances, the house, our pets, and our living situations going forwards.

It is my aim to either have him buy me out, or to have the house sold, and then to buy somewhere by myself.

Hello @secondstar, we look forward to you joining SLLMs, also wish you luck that discussions about assets and finances will be amicable. Once discussed if agreeable sort out the agreements quickly as you don’t want anyone changing their minds especially with the house. Please keep us updated as you are already part of us now that you have “shown your face” 🌺

SecondStar

Sistergold said:

SecondStar said:

I’m hoping to be able to join this thread in earnest soon!

My ex and I broke up last week, and we own a house together as joint tenants. I’ve moved out for now, but we’re sitting down on Tuesday to discuss finances, the house, our pets, and our living situations going forwards.

It is my aim to either have him buy me out, or to have the house sold, and then to buy somewhere by myself.

Hello @secondstar, we look forward to you joining SLLMs, also wish you luck that discussions about assets and finances will be amicable. Once discussed if agreeable sort out the agreements quickly as you don’t want anyone changing their minds especially with the house. Please keep us updated as you are already part of us now that you have “shown your face” 🌺

Thank you @Sistergold !

We sat down and had a chat yesterday. He said he would like to try and buy me out, and that he would like to stay in the house till then.

We split our savings yesterday for 3.7k each, and to buy me out would cost 10k.

I explored options to buy him out over the last couple of months, before realising I wasn’t able to afford the monthly payments on the property - I have expensive senior pets, who are a high outgoing.

But I told him the options that I had found - either sell things to scrape the cash together, have the cash given or loaned by family or friends, or remortgage at a higher price to generate the cash.

I have told him to speak to a mortgage advisor to asses his affordability, to start with, and to explore the option of a higher mortgage to get the cash he’d need. I have asked that he do this by mid January, because if he isn’t able to get the money together then I’ll want the house on the market asap.

I am able to stay with my friend until mid May at the latest - she has a standing arrangement that another friend will become her lodger in June.

I’ve told my ex that I want to be settled in my owned home well before June.

I’ve got a lot of Feelinggs about my ex staying in the house, but I’m dealing with those with the help of my therapist.

I know that him buying me out would be the best financial option - it would be quicker, less admin, and be slightly more money than I’d get if we sold and split the money. It would enable me to get into my own place faster.

Fingers crossed.

Sistergold

Good morning ladies. 

It was pretty hectic in my household leading up to Christmas. I know I was kind of feeling burnt out, going to work, managing the children/house AND making the kitchen so I had said I was now not going to push the kitchen and leave it to after new year. Me being me though I still carried on so much such that I then realised I had made enough progress to call in the plumber for final fit of sink. So Thursday morning I started doing the floor starting with the area where the sink would go. Plumber called to say he can come so pushed myself to get the garage areas cleared so he can move washing machine from kitchen to garage. He then came did new plumbing into garage, moved washing machine and plumbed in new sink plus new tap.The tap is 360 swivel plus it’s a pullout tap, can change mode to spray and I just love ❤️ it. Easy to use as its loops up high so big pots etc can easily go into sink. 

I was not sure about washing machine being in the garage as it means going “out” to do laundry but I have now done few loads and it’s not too bad. All along the drier was in the garage so now you can just move clothes from washing machine to drier if you want to. I tend not to use the drier but when I do it’s now going to be easier. Now that washing machine is out during laundry there is no noise in the house which is great really. 

Back to the kitchen, so plumber took quite some time as I also wanted outside tap moved from inside the garage to be outside the garage so as not to be getting garage floor wet. Plumber also needed to create water supply behind the fridge as I want to replace current American fridge freezer with a plumbed in bigger fridge freezer as as to have water and ice on the tap. Sink and water supply is on outside wall and fridge freezer is on opposite inside wall. As the plumber was doing his work I could not do mine as much so I only completed the floor on Friday and luckily dear son helped. We then managed to move back the floor units which we had been keeping in the lounge. My dishwasher is semi integrated and when plumber came the housing cabinet was not ready so he did not connect it. On Boxing Day though I managed to cut to size the countertop for the dishwasher cabinet, fitted to top and fitted the dishwasher. I connect the dishwasher and after some error codes and a bit of stress managed to get it working! So now the kitchen is almost complete! It was like last minute it just came together! 

As I was at home past few days I managed to carry on with some kitchen bits like doors, countertops etc and I just now feel more relaxed as there is not much left to do. 

The whole experience has been quite intense looking back now but I now feel more relaxed. It was really nice having an almost complete kitchen for Christmas. I say almost complete as there is still one cabinet to make and also the kitchen table still to make. The walls still need to be done but if I look past all that the kitchen is no longer the eye sore it was. Functionally it’s actually complete. All in all I am very happy with where I am now with the kitchen and what’s still need doing is functionally not urgent. 

On the mortgage front direct debit went on the 14th which included £999.99 OP. Closing balance for 2022 is £387021.09

Friday1989

@SecondStar It sounds like a productive conversation in a difficult situation. I hope things can be tied up quickly so you can move forward in your own home soon. 

@Sistergold As ever, I'm in awe of your DIY skills! 

As I chip away at the mortgage, I'm seeing the numbers going down and it's spurring me on. I'm paying for some fitted cupboards in February, going to Japan in April (almost completely paid for but I'll need spending money and to buy a Japan rail pass), and will hopefully be doing my bathroom when a relative pays me back a big chunk of money and a couple of others pay me back smaller amounts. After that, I should be able to increase my overpayments by another couple of hundred a month without feeling the pinch too badly. I could overpay more but I don't want to scrimp on enjoying life. 

I'm currently trying to decide whether to apply for a different job. My current job is pretty repetitive but low stress with decent pay. The one I'm considering is more interesting, likely more stressful but has probably got the potential for me to gain experience to get into a higher paying job. The bottom of the salary range is less than I'm on now so I'd only consider if they matched my wage (I imagine they would). 

The other option is agency which would probably pay more even factoring in pension and holidays, but I wouldn't get sick pay which worries me. I'm getting bombarded with agencies contacting me so there may be quite a few options...

badmemory

If you are getting bombarded by agencies then your skills must be in demand & they are looking at their share.  This is probably me being old fashioned but avoid the bottom feeders.

Sistergold

@Friday1989, the Japan trip finances are adding up nicely. New bathroom sounds nice, I do love a beautiful bathroom! Well done on being focused on the OPs, and it’s nice to see the numbers going down. My OPs are also going in by direct debit but at the moment it just feels like all I have over paid ‘is not making a difference!’ With all the money I have overpaid due to the increase in interest rates my monthly payments are now almost catching up with my original payments. When I got the mortgage I was paying £2200 now I am paying £2139 despite thousands of OPs! I just checked and the products I am being offered at present will mean monthly payment of about £2400! My current tracker expires 30th June! I  just trying not to think about it too much and concentrate on the fact that despite the rise the actual loan is going down and I am sure one day all the little efforts will add up. I know if I had not overpaid I would have been paying much more but still? 

@Friday1989, it’s nice to have all those job choices, I guess you will have to weigh it all up and choose the one with right balance. 

LadyWithAPlan

Glad to see we are all moving forward in 2023. I have signed up for a twice weekly DIY class - 10 weeks of level 1 carpentry and level 1 plumbing starting next week after my Autumn 10 weeks of general DIY which I loved.

I tiled and repainted my bathroom and its a joy to walk into. I now need to do the same for my kitchen and I have lots of other DIY to do in the flat but its tax month, lots of paid work and I am doing my side hustle again in February,   so I need to get back to working for that - and getting in that gym, so a busy January...plus I have bought a new Made.com workstation in the auction so this weekend as it arrives, I am sorting out my study from trashed to clear and peaceful
 I am not drinking though for January which frees up more time

Sistergold

Well done @LadyWithAPlan for committing and going through with dry January. Oh the feral diy course is done and wow you are starting the plumbing and carpentry courses? By the end of this you will be an all rounder! Once you get into diy you wonder why you never did it hey? Learning all this makes life much easier! The beauty of it is that you can make the place exactly the way you want rather than trying to explain and hope someone will be able to catch onto your vision of things! Well done!