Can anyone advise on being (or not being!) a guarantor?

ambc

My son started University in September 2019. He got great A Levels, got into his first choice University, a place in halls, and all seemed good.

He came home for 4 weeks over Christmas at which point he'd found a 2nd year house to live in with his friends and he asked me to be a guarantor for him. I agreed to this, as did his friends' parents, and we all signed the contract. I understand a guarantor's responsibilities and, as I said, I was happy to sign, given that things were going well for him and he'd generally been a pretty responsible person so far.

Fast forward to this week and I discover that it hasn't been going well. At all. He's been lying to me the whole time. He's in counselling and has been prescribed anti-depressants for anxiety and depression, he's had two attempts at suicide, and he's been self-medicating with a huge variety of class A drugs - which were found in his room in halls by security after his friends reported him. He's now been excluded from halls and banned from entering the grounds of ALL university residences. He's waiting to hear if he's also been excluded from his academic studies. And we're also waiting for the police to contact him to find out what action they will take. He'll not be returning to university this year and I genuinely don't think it will be in his best interests to return again in September either - that's if he'll even be allowed back. 

Yep, that escalated fast. It's a proper mess.

So, first and foremost is his well-being. I've already registered him with the local substance misuse service, we're having family counselling, and he's starting weekly GP appointments. But what's also worrying me is the practical stuff - mainly this tenancy for a property that he's more than likely not ever going to live in. And which I'm ultimately going to have to pay for.

It's my understanding that once you've signed as a guarantor, you can't get out of that responsibility, but how do landlords generally deal with cases like this one - where the tenant doesn't actually live in the property in the first place, rather than the tenant living there and failing to pay the rent.

I know I'll get a bunch of responses telling me that I shouldn't have signed in the first place, but that's not really going to be helpful.

Anyone have any experience with a situation like this?

Thanks.

spadoosh

Loads of time to find a replacement. 

Speak with the group that where going to let with him, theyll have their own ideas of who they want living with them and it will do you well to facilitate this as much as possible. 

Realistically the LL just wants easy rent from all the rooms. Providing you can get someone else to take up his his room by September i cant see the LL chasing you for payment. 

JGB1955

Can't you find a replacement tenant?

ambc

Ok, thanks guys. Finding a replacement sounds like a sensible solution. I think I jumped the gun and hadn't actually considered that.

However my son is still very much under the impression that he's going back in September to live there and will 'get a job' if he can't continue his studies. That raises all kinds of other issues that he hasn't thought about, including that the property will then attract council tax meaning his friends will also need to pay for that too. And then there's the question of whether his friends even want him living there in the first place!

It's all still pretty raw right now, and I haven't really had a chance to catch my breath and sit down and talk to him properly about this. I'm letting the dust settle and will tackle this with him next week.

In the meantime, I'm just about to drop the landlord agency a line to ask them how they normally deal with this kind of thing.

tom9980

ambc said:

Ok, thanks guys. Finding a replacement sounds like a sensible solution. I think I jumped the gun and hadn't actually considered that.

However my son is still very much under the impression that he's going back in September to live there and will 'get a job' if he can't continue his studies. That raises all kinds of other issues that he hasn't thought about, including that the property will then attract council tax meaning his friends will also need to pay for that too. And then there's the question of whether his friends even want him living there in the first place!

It's all still pretty raw right now, and I haven't really had a chance to catch my breath and sit down and talk to him properly about this. I'm letting the dust settle and will tackle this with him next week.

In the meantime, I'm just about to drop the landlord agency a line to ask them how they normally deal with this kind of thing.

No your son would pay the council tax entirely because students are exempt.

ambc

tom9980 said:

No your son would pay the council tax entirely because students are exempt.

Ah, gotcha. Hadn't realised that's how it worked. I thought everyone over 18 in the property became liable if it became non-exempt from council tax.

Thanks.

julicorn

He would be the only one paying the council tax, and should be able to get a discount because of that too - a few years ago that used to be 25%, but it's worth looking up what the situation is now. 
Aside from that, it sounds like a horrible situation and something that no one wants to go through. I wish you lots of strength over the next few months, and in the future in general, and that your son manages to find his feet. 

Bonniepurple

You’ve been given some good advice already, but I just wanted to add that depression and self medication  is very common amongst students, and your son won’t be the first to have done this.  Uni is a big jump from school, as is living away from home.  I wish him all the best for the future, and, if he wants to study again, I would recommend something like the Open University, where he can stay at home while learning.

spadoosh

ambc said:

Ok, thanks guys. Finding a replacement sounds like a sensible solution. I think I jumped the gun and hadn't actually considered that.

However my son is still very much under the impression that he's going back in September to live there and will 'get a job' if he can't continue his studies. That raises all kinds of other issues that he hasn't thought about, including that the property will then attract council tax meaning his friends will also need to pay for that too. And then there's the question of whether his friends even want him living there in the first place!

It's all still pretty raw right now, and I haven't really had a chance to catch my breath and sit down and talk to him properly about this. I'm letting the dust settle and will tackle this with him next week.

In the meantime, I'm just about to drop the landlord agency a line to ask them how they normally deal with this kind of thing.

From experience this doesnt work out. Hes not gonna sit and watch all his uni mates dossing all day and getting smashed all night and be happy working full time. Id expect the job to suffer very quickly. 

We had a ballache with our mate who did this. Ended up in a new low paid job every few weeks/months, always struggling to actually pay his rent and bills. LL tried starting to chase us but had ballsed up with it being a HMO but not having the necessary requirements. Hed put us all on one agreement when it shouldve been individual agreements so he couldnt do much. 

Might be worth pointing out that student residences are usually a stupidly expensive way of securing accommodation.

Not sure how bad the drug issue is, id say drug use at unis is quite high, so its not uncommon. People abilities to deal with their drug use varies greatly. A close friend would do anything going all weekend, speed, ket, cocaine, pills you name it hed have it , then be in fro every one of his astrophysics phd classes. I didnt see him graduate his phd but he got a first in his BSc, he was bright and appeared to function quite normally with a very high drug use. Someone else i knew started smoking weed, over a few months it got to higher and higher levels until he snapped and went in to a paranoid induced panic/rage which took him years to get over. 

ambc

spadoosh said:
From experience this doesnt work out. 

Yep, I know that. You know that. On the other hand, he has zero life experience and is completely clueless.

ambc

Bonniepurple said:

You’ve been given some good advice already, but I just wanted to add that depression and self medication  is very common amongst students, and your son won’t be the first to have done this.  Uni is a big jump from school, as is living away from home.  I wish him all the best for the future, and, if he wants to study again, I would recommend something like the Open University, where he can stay at home while learning.

Sure, thanks. Looking back, I think it was probably a mistake for him to leave home in the first place, and that he should probably have studied at a local university. That would be my preference - I think he'd struggle with the discipline to do a fully home based learning course.