Family inheritance problem

chesky

Silver tabby, I think that may be the case.

pickledonionspaceraider

I say leave your estate to your grandchildren.

They are the ones who are really going to need it - not your daughters

The chances of your grandchildren ever owning a home, as you say, are very slim,where your daughters are sorted- and if you leave it to your daughters it may get absorbed into his family at some point, ie complete strangers

Grandkids, all the way

chesky

Thank you all for your comments.
I must admit that my first thinking was that I could bypass my daughters and leave everything to the grandchildren but, despite what some have said on here, it's not MY estate that primarily concerns me - it's my daughter's.

If, by some horrible unnatural occurrence, my daughter died before me, I would be still upset about what she had done, even though I could correct the financial imbalance.

At any rate, I'm not rushing into anything. I love both my daughters and have always tried to treat everyone fairly. It would never have crossed my mind to leave them out of my will and I think doing so would upset them, not just about the money, but the mean-spiritedness of excluding them.
Perhaps I could leave them a set amount, with the residue to the grandchildren.

The pondering continues.

Mojisola

chesky wrote: »

it's not MY estate that primarily concerns me - it's my daughter's.

If, by some horrible unnatural occurrence, my daughter died before me, I would be still upset about what she had done

You really just need to get over it - your daughter has made her choices, just like you have with your will.

getmore4less

If you don't like what your daughter plans for her estate, don't make it bigger.

pickledonionspaceraider

chesky wrote: »

it's not MY estate that primarily concerns me - it's my daughter's.

If, by some horrible unnatural occurrence, my daughter died before me, I would be still upset about what she had done.

Now you are just looking for things to worry about.

Your daughter has made her choice and as a fellow adult - it is not your business to concern yourself with

You do not need to own all the worry in the world.

Concern yourself with stuff that is your business and under your control, ie your own Will

Skiddaw1

Chesky, I think your idea about leaving your daughters a set amount with the residue going to your granddaughters could be the solution. As you have said, your daughters are both comfortably off so leaving them both an equal, comparatively modest amount isn't likely to raise any eyebrows and then you know your granddaughters are going to benefit.

Gavin83

chesky wrote: »

I love both my daughters and have always tried to treat everyone fairly.

Yet you seem to be upset with her doing the same thing.

I do agree with the others though, it's not really any of your business. You are in control of your own will and should plan accordingly but you certainly aren't in control of hers. I don't even believe you've got a right to ask her to justify it either.

Your suggestion does seem to be a reasonable solution however.

onwards&upwards

chesky wrote: »

Thank you all for your comments.
I must admit that my first thinking was that I could bypass my daughters and leave everything to the grandchildren but, despite what some have said on here, it's not MY estate that primarily concerns me - it's my daughter's.

If, by some horrible unnatural occurrence, my daughter died before me, I would be still upset about what she had done, even though I could correct the financial imbalance.

Would you not be more disappointed if your daughter had married a man who was happy to cut out his children? I think it’s a good sign that he hasn’t given up on them.

Mojisola

Skiddaw1 wrote: »

Chesky, I think your idea about leaving your daughters a set amount with the residue going to your granddaughters could be the solution.

There could be a problem with this if much of the estate gets spent on, say, residential care in the future.

The daughters' set amounts would be paid out first, possibly leaving very little for the grandchildren.